Flying with an infant

[ladymoreta]

Need advice on whether or not I should attempt this...

My BIL is getting married in Florida this June, and my baby will be about 11 weeks old. I really want to go, but if I do, I have three options:

• Fly with an infant
• Drive there with my MIL (she has volunteered to go with me if I decide not to fly)
• Leave my baby with my mom while I go to the wedding

So, my preference is to fly with him. I know that crying babies on planes are awful and everyone will hate me, but it seems so much easier than spending two days each way in a car with a 2.5 month old. (BTW - my future SIL said that there will be several babies at the wedding, and they have a cry room at the back, so he is definitely invited.)

My mom thinks I'm being unreasonable to not want to leave him with her, but I just can't imagine leaving him for several days when he's so young. I'm not worried that she won't take good care of him, but he won't know her or her house, and I'm not sure if I'll be producing enough milk to pump enough for him for that long. And most importantly, I just don't think I'll be ready to be away from him for that long yet. She says that I'll be ready for a break sooner than I think, and she thinks it will be good for me to get away.

What would you do in this situation? Have any of you flown with an infant? I know the takeoff and landing will be rough, but how is the actual flight? Would driving be better? Or is it silly to think that it's that big of a deal to leave him with my mom for a few days? Or should I just send my regrets and skip the wedding? (Really don't want to do this...)

Traveling with an infant is the easiest time TO travel with a child. Generally the biggest concern with a baby that young is germs in the plane, but June is pretty much the low tide for cold / flu season if you're going to do it. FWIW, 2.5 hours w/an 11 week old would *most likely* be cake (assuming he's not colicky). It's entirely possible he'd just sleep the whole drive. We drove from Cleveland to Chicago (6 hours) when Quinn was just ... 3 or 4 weeks old?, and then from KC to Cleveland (850 miles, which we did break in to two days) when Mattie was 3 weeks old, and again at 6 weeks.

I would not have been ready to leave my infant at 11 weeks, but that's just me.

[MrsK]

I don't have an infant but I'm willing to try it if you are. I was sort of thinking of making a trip to my FL office with Baby K when he's about 11-12 weeks (end of March/early April) to ease my transition from maternity leave.

[ladymoreta]

Thanks! The drive would be about 20 hours each way, so we'd probably break it up over two days if we go the driving route. The flight would be about 5-6 hours, with one stop.

[ladymoreta]

I don't have an infant but I'm willing to try it if you are. I was sort of thinking of making a trip to my FL office with Baby K when he's about 11-12 weeks (end of March/early April) to ease my transition from maternity leave.

Ooh, you'll have to let me know how it goes. From what I've read, there's a good chance at that age that they'll fall asleep pretty easily after the takeoff. Crossing my fingers that we get sleepy little boys if we try this!

[Auspicious]

We flew with Cora for the first time when she was 11 weeks old--Chicago to New England, about 2 hours. I was definitely nervous about it beforehand, but then it went really well, actually. Having a 2:1 adult-to-infant ratio definitely helps. Blog post about the trip here. I think of that trip as really marking "the end of the fourth trimester" for us and it was kind of a turning point. I would not expect it to be relaxing, but I would plan to go and plan to fly with the baby, out of all your options.

Everyone is different, but I did not feel ready to be away from her that early, and also would not have wanted to try to pump exclusively for days at a time at that point. And I would rather do the flight than the drive.

Takeoff and landing have not made her cry either time we've flown with her. *shrug* I remember on that trip she was hungry when we boarded the plane, so she was already done nursing by the time we actually took off. She didn't care.

Good luck!

[JaneDoe]

We flew with dd from Pa to Or when she was about 10 or 11 weeks old. Other than all the stuff you have to haul for such a little thing, it was easy (compared to when she was mobile).

We flew with ds from Pa to Or when he was 4 weeks old. Of course we had dd too, who was two years old. Ds at 4 weeks was easy, Dd at 2 . . . not so much.

[MrsK]

Ooh, you'll have to let me know how it goes. From what I've read, there's a good chance at that age that they'll fall asleep pretty easily after the takeoff. Crossing my fingers that we get sleepy little boys if we try this!

I have to admit, I'm anxious about switching planes. Making the connections and getting through security in Houston was rough my last trip to FL. It was nearly impossible to run to the gate while 8 months pregnant. I couldn't imagine attempting it with a baby that needs to be fed, held, diapered, etc. I'm going to try to set up at least a 2 hour lay over next time. The 1 hour lay overs last trip were really rough.

Will your DH be with you?

There are very few times that I would say YES travel with your kids... but this is one time that actually worked for us. I travelled with all three kids at about three months. They did wonderfully. I have done both flying and driving.

I think with the flying, I tried to plan feedings for the take-off, landing time of the trip. One of my kiddos had a soother so I let them suck on that just to help with their ears.

I drove 16 hours with my 3 month old (my first child) and surprisingly that went really well also. They sleep A LOT during that period, and I find that they are the easiest to keep happy!

Let us know what you plan on doing!!

Oh and I agree, I don't know if I would be able to leave my 11 wk old bub with anyone either. You may be able to, and it might even be a well-deserved (needed!) break but you have to do what is best for you

[Chrisada]

I've traveled with an infant as young as 2-weeks-old. The smaller the better. Nurse during take off and landing and have a carrier like a Bjorn or whatever. Chances are the baby will sleep the whole time. With all that said, I know it can be nerve racking!

I would choose flying over driving because you can nurse/walk around/hold him etc as needed to keep him happy. And it really is easier before they are mobile!

[DCJenn]

and honestly (as I tempt the flying gods) even when they're older, as long as you're prepared and not freaked out, they won't be either.

Turbulence? Bumpy clouds and they're super fun to fly through!!!!

No snacks? No problem, mom has an entire bag full of dude's favorite snacks!

Spilling an issue? Mom has a cool water bottle that she carried on empty! Wow and it's NEW!

Boredom- nothing that new crayons, coloring books, reading along books, Where's Waldo books and stickers can't cure. and, although it makes for dicey preboarding- I fly when he's normally asleep- after a snack, some juice, a little coloring, the head goes down, he goes to sleep and I get to read the magazine from 2002 that I haven't read yet. (hey JLo and Ben Affleck are engaged- who knew?)

But everything I've ever seen and heard (and remember I used to fly weekly) is that infants are by far the easiest and most transportable age. Diapers, wipes, change of clothes, bottles if you use them. That's about all you need for the plane- the rest can get checked through.

Jenn

[Michele]

Babies are totally portable. Fly. Use a baby carrier. Just make sure to have a food source available for take off (breast or bottle).

(didn't read the other responses)

[HouseofWool]

Ditto what everyone said. I flew with C at about 3-4 months from WI to NYC. No big deal. He typically slept.

You can try to fly with a lap baby and bring your carseat (to gate check) and if there are enough seats, you can use it in flight.

Otherwise, nursing is a great way to ensure that you have your section to yourself. I've never seen businessmen clear out so quickly as when it became obvious that I was planning on nursing

Not sure what your layovers will look like, but don't be afraid to ask the stewardess to radio ahead asking for skycap to help you get to your next gate if you feel you need it.

[ladymoreta]

Great advice everyone - thank you so much! This makes me feel so much better about flying with him. DH scheduled his vacation for that week, so he'll be with me. That will be much less intimidating than trying to do it by myself. Yay - now I'm getting excited about our little mini-vacation!