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DCJenn...a poem

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  • DCJenn...a poem

    Heard this on NPR this morning (The Writer's Almanac), and I thought of you...


    How to Tell If You're a Participant or a Staff (A Handy Guide for Day Programs)

    If you have a bowel movement at work and no one records it in a
    communication book — you're a staff person.

    If someone shouts at you from the other side of the room, Did you
    wash your hands? every time you come out of the bathroom — you're a participant.

    If your feet don't quite touch the ground when you're sitting in one of
    the cafeteria chairs — you're a participant.

    If you know where the candy is in Jolene's office — you're a staff
    person.

    If you can run out to Subway or Burger King for your lunch — you're a staff person.

    If you're in a wheelchair — you're a participant.

    If you get a buzz cut every staff day — you're a participant.

    If you've never ridden in the back seat of the van — you're a staff
    person.

    If you can walk in the office without being asked, Where are you
    supposed to be? — you're a staff person.

    If the soap dispenser is on the side of the sink opposite your one good
    hand and you can't reach high enough to keep the automatic faucet
    from getting your sleeve wet — you're a participant.

    If you can give a hug without someone telling you, Remember circles —
    you're a staff person.

    If you go out for cigarette breaks — you're a staff person.

    If your paycheck is for $1.82 — you're a participant.
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