Text Etiquete

[PrincessFiona]

And I had to look up how to spell etiquette.

I rarely text and I really struggle with texting in general. I feel like I'm doing something wrong.

Something that is really hard for me is knowing how to end a conversation once I've begun (so I just don't start!). It's harder to carry on a conversation for me via text and I find that I feel rude just simply not answering once the topic has been played out. Generally, that is how other people end txt conversations with me. We are talking and suddenly there is radio wave silence. By the same token, if I get a quick text from someone, I feel concerned that I'm supposed to be initiating more conversation.

So how do you do it? Do you share any of my awkward feelings or am I just old?

Kris

[lovelight]

Yep, we just end conversations when it's played out. I think it's just the way of texting so nobody ever thinks anything bad of it. I'm not sure I've ever officially said bye or "ended" a text conversation.


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[MAPPLEBUM]

I think this is one of those differences between generations. When my MIL used to text me and I'd stop responding she'd send 5-10 more before finally giving up. It was really annoying.

For my generation and younger I think the common sentiment is we all know we're connected all the time so if you stop responding or even just take awhile to respond it's not personal, you're just doing something else. Or to be frank, you're tired of talking. I'm one of those people who can take days to respond to a text. Or longer. I just responded to a text my friend sent on the 8th. I must have been busy when I got it and it got lost in the shuffle. I don't expect anyone to take that personally. I get so many texts and emails a day the only ones I try to respond to promptly are work related.

It might be easier to pretend you're sending casual emails to a friend. Or posting on here. Great if they respond immediately but this conversation is not actually happening in real time.

[medpedspouse]

I do not know this is proper etiquette...call it MPS rules of texting.

I only text to convey information, record information (contractors, coworkers, etc) or to send a message to someone that I do not know if they are available to talk.

So, here is my rule of thumb...if it takes me more than 3 text messages to pass on my information, I ask the person if I can call. I get the social aspect of texting and engage in it sometimes but I limit it to no more than 3 or max 4. My social texting is usually a "hey! been thinking about you...how did X go? Yes, doing well, blah, blah blah". If I want to know more about whatever they share I ask if we can catch up over the phone or get together. Therefore, the "conversations" usually die out once the info is exchanged. I rarely say Bye...it is usually just an "OK", "Great plan", "talk to you soon", etc.

I just do not have the patience to text a whole social discourse with my thumbs and f-ing auto correct.

[mommax3]

I text until the conversational objective has been achieved. With my friends (who are also "old" &#128521 we sometimes end the conversation with a "talk to you later" or "gotta go", but not always. With younger people, (my kids, etc.) that doesn't happen.

[spotty_dog]

Texts cost me $.20 each, and pecking through the numeric pad to punch in my message is laborious, so although my mom always ends conversations with an emoji (that I can't see, because I don't have a smart phone, so it's just like "square box!") I just don't answer if I don't have something else relevant to say. I definitely share your concerns about this feeling like an awkward way to have a conversation.

[ladymoreta]

Yes, it's fine to let it hang there without a goodbye after the information is conveyed. I think of texting in several different categories.
- Informative: "No soccer practice today!" I reply "Ok" to make sure they know I got it.
- Picture of the kids to a relative or friend: Don't expect a reply. If she replies with a comment, I usually don't reply unless it was a question.
- Group conversations: I reply as I have time, sometimes to things that happened hours ago. Also fine to not reply to things from hours ago if I have nothing to add. No offense taken by anyone in the group if someone isn't responding at the time.
- Random thoughts to DH: He replies if/when he has time.
- Checking in with friends: "Hey! Haven't seen you in awhile. How's it going?" Ok to reply hours or even a day or two later. Also fine to call to catch up. These usually consist of the initial text, a response, and the originator saying what's going on with them. 3 texts should take care of it unless we decide to follow up with a meetup. No need for a "Goodbye" or "Talk to you later".

[ladymoreta]

Texts cost me $.20 each, and pecking through the numeric pad to punch in my message is laborious, so although my mom always ends conversations with an emoji (that I can't see, because I don't have a smart phone, so it's just like "square box!") I just don't answer if I don't have something else relevant to say. I definitely share your concerns about this feeling like an awkward way to have a conversation.

This is a good point - if someone doesn't have a texting plan, they usually let people know. Definitely don't drag out conversations with people who pay for individual texts!

[Vanquisher]

There are some people that I only have text conversations with (ahem, Sylvia). Some that I have very short convos with occasionally (Ryan). Most people are in between. Text for a quick convo or broken convo (doing something else) or I call.

[SoonerTexan]

What Laurie said. Mostly I view it as a convenient way to connect with or transfer info to someone when you don't really have the time to call. I like it actually!

[Ladybug]

I (we) usually text about a specific topic. It ends with questions answered. The occasional, hey what's up, txt happens with family. It usually ends with a time to call and talk.

[niener]

I don't expect to have an official ending/sign-off to a conversation either. Occasionally one warrants a "sounds good" or "ok thanks" or "see ya then" but for the most part they just end when the conversation dies down. My biggest texting etiquette pet peeve is people who don't use punctuation. I have a tech illiterate aunt who sends one obnoxiously long text every time without a single punctuation mark. It is SO hard to read!

[samssugarmomma]

I agree with the others - I don't think I've ever said "good bye" or had anyone else text "good bye" when we were done conversing via text. I have occasionally responded with something like "It's too complicated to write down so I'll call you in a bit" but that's mostly to DH.