I'm going to post this here while I debate on whether or not to send it...

Dear Oprah,

Two of your shows in the past two weeks have particularly caught my attention. One talked to several different 30-somethings about their lives and one on Inspiring Households. Specifically in the 30-something show you told the infertile women to relax, take a vacation, all the things that infertile women shouldn’t have to hear from anyone, especially someone in your position. Then in the Inspiring Households story you stressed several times that the quads were natural, not from fertility drugs. Is that important for some reason? Do you think those parents love their children more because they weren’t conceived with the help of modern medicine?

I realize that some people are against IVF and that is a personal decision but surely you know there are women out there that are infertile yet conceive with the help of medicine without using IVF. Being infertile doesn’t mean IVF is your only option, being infertile means you have been actively trying to conceive for more than one year under the age of 35 and at least six months over the age of 35.

I do realize there are women out there who are impatient and after 4-6 months they go to their doctor and demand treatment. These women, and their doctors, give infertile women a bad name. There are also women who through charting and medical ways of tracking your cycle know that there is something wrong after 4-6 months. These women and the other women who are seeking treatment have every right to seek that treatment and make the decision that is right for them and their families.

Some women will choose to stop treatments and adopt, they should be praised for choosing to open their home to a child who may not have had a good life otherwise. However, does that make them a better parent then the parent who chose to have modern medicine help them conceive a biological child?

You are one of the most respected women in our society today. You had the opportunity to really educate the public about the misunderstood world of infertility. You failed miserably by making an infertile woman seem uptight and by implying that most multiples are a product of IVF. I hope you will take to heart all of the letters I’m sure you have received on the infertile woman from the 30-something show and do a real show that will truly show how infertility affects women. Help us educate the world on what infertility really is and that there are ways to treat it. Help us educate the world that it truly is a disease.

Sincerely,
An infertile viewer