So, for those of you who are new, I blogged throughout my husband's deployment back in 2007. The whole entire thing sucked but the blog became my place to spew and worry and think "outloud" and generally be able to keep my sanity.

This time he's NOT being deployed but is heading back to DC for a year to complete a fellowship in Neurophysiology. (basically it's a year of epilepsy, all the time- and specalizing in ekgs and the other various tests they use in diagnosing epilepsy)

I'm not even remotely amused by this- I was zen, and then I was sad, and then I was mad, and that's pretty much been my general state for the last three or so months. Pretty much just generic rage. Sometimes it gets tamped down to annoyance but pretty much I'm exceptionally pissed.

As I was shoveling my 700th shovel of mulch this afternoon, I got so mad that I had to stop speaking to him while we were working on the yard. I mean for the love of all- I 'get' why he wants to do this and I was absolutely welcome to come along but 'we' decided (I decided) that it would be better for us to stay here. and it is better.

I've already said my piece to him, there's no sense kicking that dead horse, and he IS really upset about leaving. (and honestly, the deal is done- this is the Army, he's got orders, he'll be there to report for duty by June 25th or he's awol.) but COME ON-

I met him in 1999- 3rd year of medical school. He surprised me by picking peds. He completely surprised me by deciding to do neurology and this? completely out of the blue. I mean what dumbass GOES BACK for a year of fellowship after training for six years and being out for three? Seriously. (and 7 months of those three years was in Iraq)

I can't wait to hear what he's decided to do next. Dental school? Law school? Kathryn Gibb's Secretarial School? (are those places even open anymore- a friend of mine from high school actually graduated from one)

The packers come on Wednesday and at this point I will so happy to have the piles of crap out of my office/dining room/bed room that I'm not going to be 'that' sad. and I scheduled the cleaning lady for next Wednesday because he'll be gone for sure by then and I can have a actual CLEAN house.