Neighbor Kids

Here is my problem...The 4 year old down the street neighbor boy is over here all the time. He is here waiting for me to get back from taking my kids to school at 8:00am. This morning he was ringing the doorbell at 7:30. The boys and I were still asleep from all the 4th activities last night. One thing too is he just doesn't ring it once. Before I could get out of bed, I kid you not he had rung it 8 times. Before I could get to the door I'm sure it rang over 25 times! I told him we were still asleep and that he needed to go home. This little one got mad and told me to wake them because he was bored at his house and he wanted to play. I'm surprised his doorbell ringing didn't do the wake up trick! Anyway, I hate to go and complain to his parents but I'm really unhappy with him coming down here. All the other neighbors are calling him Dennis.

That is an interesting situation...especially considering the fact that the child is only 4. :..Do his parents know he is coming over alone at 7.30 a.m.?



When we were living in Pennsylvania, we had a friend with a similar problem. She and her husband bought a house and then the nextdoor neighbors, who were raising 3 girls, just allowed (even sent?) the girls over daily. She initially tried being polite....she felt sorry for the girls....but at the same time, she was caring for her own children and was getting exasperated by the problem.



What she eventually did was to become quite firm with the girls...and eventually less friendly. I don't know if she ever had to confront the parents personally, but I know she stopped being very friendly to them.



That is such a tough call, because you live next to them...



Do you know the parents very well? I just can't imagine sending my 4 year old out alone to head over to someone else's house to play...especially not without some sort of an invitation....am I just out-of-touch?



Kristen

These people have not been in the neighborhood a year yet. When they moved the boy was 3 and he rode his bike down the middle of the street to anyones house he wanted to go to. He had his birthday and of all things got a new bike! I was really amazed that the child was only 3. His mother works during the day and his dad "watches" him. Then mom comes home and dad works nights. I'm thinking dad says go play with those boys. I only met dad a month ago because he had been down here for 4 hours and he got a "little worried"! I too started off being nice but have since changed my plan of attach. I pretty much tell him to go home that the boys can't play. None of the 3 want to play with him, so I just send him home. He climbs the fence if the boys are in the back yard because he doesn't want me to send him home. When I do let him play he orders me around like you wouldn't believe...I'll take something to drink now and I'm hungry go get me something! I would curl up and cry if my kids acted this way to another mother. He even got into a tug of war fight with me as I was trying to put the toys away. My boys know when they push the limit and you should have seen my little ones eyes when he snatched the toy away from me. He has even gone so far as to call me "hey, dumb butt". He is hearing it from somewhere and I sure don't want him around my house. I use to feel sorry for him but I don't even have that anymore. Normally I'm really nice but this kid does me in.

You know, I find it really sad for that boy on the one hand...but I would be totally over the top if I were you! That is pretty rude behavior coming from a 4 year old...



Have you ever talked to the mother? I wonder if she knows what is going on? If she is working all day and trusting "dad" to do it....I wonder if he just sleeps all day and lets you be the "babysitter" if he is working nights.



Have you talked with any of the other parents in the neighborhood? Maybe you could all sort of "unite" and then choose someone to go over and tactfully have a chat with the mother. The thing is...this is really kind of dangerous for the child. If no one is watching him, then he could easily be injured.



I would say go and talk to the mom...and if that doesn't work, you may want to consider the Department of Family Services...although I think that should be a last-resort!



Let me know what happens, I am really interested in this.



Kris

Hi Devera,



Whatever happened with the neighbor boy? Did you end up having to talk to his parents?



I hope the rest of your summer is going well!



Sincerely,



Kristen

Kristen,



No, I have not had to go talk with his parents. He for the most part has stayed away. I'm thinking they were on vacation this past week. He was down earlier today when the boys were playing out in the front. He played for a little while and then got upset because "the rules are dumb", he then got on his bike and peddled home. Hasn't been to bad. I started a project before the boys and I went to Kansas City ~ refinishing the breakfast area table and chairs. I have the table back in the house and 6 chairs STILL out in the garage. I have 3 ready to move in but I'm waiting until I get those last 3 done. I figure if I move 3 in that I'll not finish the other 3 for months. My list of things to do this summer is getting shorter and I'm just about ready to get the monsters back into a schedule. I don't want to say things are running ttttoooo smoothly as that is always when something happens. The boys and I will be taking off this Friday to go to my parents for a family reunion. Some family from California that I have not seen in 15 years will be coming. Kind of scary ~ I was 18 years old the last time I saw them ~ Now I'm the mother of 3! Wow, kind of heavy! Well, I had better get as we have a baseball game tonight and the uniform is in the dirty clothes

So you do a lot of furniture refinishing? I built (from a LOWES kit) and finished our entertainment center, bookshelves, kitchen nook(table and corner nook and bench) and refinished an old bedroom set for my daughter...I found that I got better with each project.



I hope that you have a good time on your trip....It is scarey how fast the time flies by, isn't it. I certainly don't feel 30. Last time I went home to visit my mom, I met with our neighbor's daughter...she was in preschool when we moved into the neighborhood...and is graduating from highschool.....UNBELIEVABLE!!



Talk to you soon,



Kristen