Terrific Twos

My youngest is almost 2 and he is terrific BUT ... there is that other side of being 2 that really is showing up right now so I could use some advice from the experts out there.

Dallin has started spitting, kicking, hitting, and pinching when he doesn't get his way. His favorite words are no, don't and mine. Oh and "done" which is usually said after one bite of his dinner. My right leg is completely black and blue from holding him while he is kicking my thigh with his high top basketball shoes! Ouch! Anyway....

Any suggestions on how to minimalize the physical behavior? Have you had much success with time-outs at this age? My other children did this also but I don't remember it being this bad. Of course, my memory is shot!!!! Being the 4th boy in the family, I know he has picked up a lot of things from his brothers but I have got to get this somewhat under control, especially when we are in a public place. He throws these temper tantrums and makes it nearly impossible to get the grocery shopping done or go to the library etc. Help, please...

Having a desperate day in Arizona,
Robin

My "terrific" two year old is really bothered by time outs....he is my 3rd child (the baby of the bunch) and very much enjoys the time together with his brother and sister...it is almost devastating to him to be separated...

We have had a lot of trouble lately with spitting and huge tantrums....I'm quick to remind my older two when Alex hits them where he learned it from (Is that a terrible thing?)

On one occasion, I resorted to putting Alex in his room and holding the door close for a few minutes I felt awful about it, and it wasn't a long time, but I was so upset by the kicking,etc...

I feel at a complete and utter loss to offer you any advice because I consider you to be the mother du jour (did I spell that right?)

If it's any consolation, several of my friends with more than two children feel that the terrible two phase is worse in their youngest...perhaps because they get so much attention and tend to get away with a bit more? I don't know...it's probably true in our case though! Our others grew out of it...we can only wear shin guards until these little angels sprout their halos

Kris

[Meenah]

You don't even want my advice. We used to call it :

The terrible twos
The trying threes
AND
The fu--ing fours!!!!!!!!!!!

This is the easy part!!

When they are four they can whine, manipulate, throw temper tantrums, but you just cannot reason with them yet.

Good Luck,
Luanne

That is hysterical, Luanne!!!! So I'd love to hear your rundown on the teen-age years

Kris

I got a good night sleep last night and my "put-up-with" abilities have improved today. I haven't been so frustrated with the bad behavior and I just try to keep myself from getting kicked! He has been ornery today too but ... he has also been cute and I keep trying to focus on that. I still need to figure out something that works to curb the behavior. Patience, patience, patience. I was so deceived when I first had children and I thought they would outgrow the 2's and be angels. No one talks about the 3s and 4s. Luanne, I agree with Kris, your comments were hysterical!

I can't imagine Dallin being worse than he is now and it is a good thing because I probably would lock myself in a closet somewhere!! A lot of my frustration though is probably dealing with the whole thing by myself. I really could use a hand and Russ is three time zones away. Boy, will he be surprised when he gets home. He will wonder what happened to his angelic son!

I have closed Dallin in a room and held the door closed for a few minutes to save my sanity. If truth be told, and you may not agree with my tactic but I switched the lock on the door when Tyler was 3 so that I could lock him in when he was so out of control that I couldn't get him to sit in time-out. I figured it was better than me losing my temper. Unfortunately, for the door, Tyler threw a truck at it and actually put a hole in it!!!! I took the lock off when one day, Tyler locked me in while I was putting away some toys!!

I have quite the pair don't I?! They are good kids. They have an abundant amount of energy which comes from their dad's side of the family. All of Russ' family are up at dawn and going nonstop all day long. It amazes me. They get tons done and play hard too. I just don't have the energy to keep up. But... my four boys sure have that same energy. I am jealous!! Now, if I can just get them to control it.

I still welcome any other advice. It is nice to know that we all go through this to some degree with our children. Thanks. I look forward to hearing Luanne's high school stages!

Robin

[Meenah]

Robin,
I laughed so hard I almost fell off of the chair. When my girls were 1 & 2 I also turned the doorknob around. My husband traveled extensively at the time, usually gone three weeks at a time out of the country. One afternoon Amy locked the door and shut it. I was locked in the bedroom, UPSTAIRS with Amy & Caroline, and I knew my husband wouldn't be home for 1 1/2 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to climb out onto the roof (on the back of the house) and scream until somone heard me. Of course it was July and everyone was inside with the air conditioners on. Finally a little girl heard me and after some convincing believed I really needed help. This all took about an hour. One of the LONGEST hours in my life, until of course the first time Amy was an hour late with the car!!! You are in for some interesting times ladies.
Luanne

OMG...I am laughing hysterically ......that is sooo funny.......but tell me....how do you reverse your doorknobs? I might trythis (I'll just make sure I don't get locked in after hearing about all of this!). Our kids just refuse to stay in their bedrooms now at bedtime and we are having a lot of trouble with bedtime...It would make things much easier if they simply couldn't get out...

Well, Luanne, these aren't encouraging words ! My 5 year old has been going through the terrible twos since she was....well......15 months old . Her latest is to say in a very, very smart allecy tone "uhhh heeeellllooo" when she wants 1. your attention or 2. to make a point. This is said as if she were rolling her eyes in total disbelief at my stupidity and is driving me NUTS!!!! This is the same child that began her artwork on the walls as soon as she could color and get Andrew to hand over a crayon (before age 1).......I'm already at my wit's end....I can't imagine how things will be at age 10...let alone 13... sigh.....this should be really interesting!!!

Kris

[Meenah]

We have pictures of Caroline & Amy underneath their artwork on the living room wall. The artwork has improved. Just always remember - you are "making memories". I would give anything to have the little girls back, only now they are 16 & 17 (18 next week).
Luanne

[Meenah]

I don't think I would try the doorknob reversal. It really is a fire hazard and dangerous. I was desperate at the time!!!! How about one of those "hook & eye" gate latches? you can put those on the outside of the door up high where only you have control of it.

I have another door story, when my youngest was around 10 she SLAMMED the bedroom door whenever she was mad, upset, etc. Her dad told her that if she didn't stop he would take the door off the hinges. Well, she did and he did. After about a week she promised she wouldn't slam the door anymore and he put it back. A little drastic, but it worked. Isn't it funny, we try to keep them in their rooms when they are toddlers, and we try to keep them from locking themselves in when they are teenagers!!!!