Doctor. Doctor.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

All is well....today was Daegan's 1-year check up from the osteomyelitis....and the rads/doc say the bones look good. We're clear! (I knew we would be, but it's good to get the official discharge.)

Tomorrow is the 1 year anniversary of taking our little boy home! And of course, Russ has journal club so we can't have a family dinner.

I'm going to be scarce for a while....there just seems to be too much going on....PMs come to my email if you need me.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

I have been home dealing with a pukey Daegan and the dawkter has a resp virus. Daegan has an infection in both ears and his throat...and hasn't kept anything down all day. I've washed the bed sheets twice now, am running out of non-puked on clothes, am confined to the rocking chair and have barely touched his costume. Our kitchen is full of dishes from the soups I've been making for the grumpy dawkter. I want my mommy!

At least Russ' moonlighting gig was canceled. Now he has next week off! The $$ would've been nice, but the break for our sanity/relationship will be MUCH nicer!!

At least I have iMSN to keep me company for this sleepless night.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

So in an effort to be more positive about my life, here are some pics of the boy from last weekend.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

I know I've been MIA lately. Things are just busy here. After Halloween, I went to the Brad Paisley/Rodney Atkins/Taylor Swift concert...Russ got sick again. Then this past weekend, I had a booth at the local babyfair for my babywearing group. I spent a lot of time making fliers/posters/photo albums....and no one that we didn't already know showed up!! At least Daegan was an ANGEL the whole day...from 8:30am until 3:30pm....he was up and down in the carriers and took both naps in them!

He's gotten soo much fun recently! He wants to run and play with the big kids on the block....and he really seems to understand me when I talk to him. 22.5 pounds and 30.5 inches tall. (He had a well-baby check today.) Even daddy's enjoying spending time with him!!

Less than 2 weeks until I see my family!!!

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

Thanksgiving was great! And I can't believe it was already over a week ago. I realized that Russ misses Florida as much as I do....he's just not as vocal.

Daegan wooed my family again and my parents are already planning their next visit.

I've been going to a 'French club' the past few months and I really enjoy it but I feel sooo dumb! I took several years in school but honestly haven't used it in about 8 years......and the group doesn't mind but I feel like my attempts are futile....maybe I can find a class at the local CC to practice with...I'm having trouble getting into the Rosetta Stone program we have.

ugh...Daegan calls...I'll try to update more later.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

I suck at updating....oh well...I suppose this is more about being cathartic to type it all out than to keep all my bitchin' inside.

So current bitchin': Daegan's daycare....I *think* we might have a solution....he's been fighting with the other kids (1.5 yo)....and there is a biter in the class. He's been bitten 4 times in the past 2 weeks....and twice on the face. I really think the teacher isn't paying enough attention...or doesn't have control of the class. She's the same one who always complains about him being "difficult." I went to the director and we agreed to move Daegan to a different room. He's now with the older children...2 yo to 2.5 yo. And he really likes the teacher. I hope this is going to be a good move for him. I hate struggling with the SAH vs W issue. I've tried to convince my parents to come out here for a bit but it's not really feasible for them. I wish it were.

Other bitchin'....Russ' "reading." He bitches and moans about how behind he is and how much reading he has to do...."it's not fun reading, honey...it's work." And about how I never let him do it and I demand too much time....and that I shouldn't expect anything from him. Ugh...puh-lease. You chose medicine.....you chose this field knowing that it required work. If I had to give up a crap ton to move for your job, you can give up your free time to read....not our time. It just royally pisses me off when I see him spending an hour, two or even sometimes more on the internet, reading about cars, or politics or whatever. He thinks the solution is to stay at work longer....uh no. You already come home too late and interrupt putting Daegan to bed (barking dogs and all)....and the little boy needs his sleep! It also sucks to do dinner and bedtime routines completely alone. I think he should get up early and do it then......but he wants to leave the house to do it...so I have to plan my shower around his schedule. I'm incapable of showering when it's just me and Daegan at home....so to avoid getting up at the asscrack of dawn to shower before he "needs" to leave....I guess I get to shower at night before bed (yeah right...I crash when Daegan finally falls asleep)...or during my "me-time." Yeah, I finally have some "me-time!" Daegan's new nap schedule at school has him sleeping from 11:30 to 2:30 ish so I have some time between 12 when I finish work and 2:30 when I pick him up. I've been tanning a couple of times and I've watched a couple of DVDs....I've also tried to catch up on iMSN. I'm starting to depend on it. And the days that I don't get it are sucky!

Fortuna's wheel was kind to us on Thursday....a city water main broke and they closed the hospital clinics....Russ was off early...so we hit our fav sushi spot and gorged ourselves with yumminess! Her wheel spun back and Friday, all daycares/schools were closed, but hospital clinics were open....oh yeah and I had to work a full day b/c two other vets were out. No sitter, Daegan came to work with me. Thank god he's a good kid!! It was a slow day and I was able to wear him on my back for a good part of it. I was soo stressed out thinking that my coworkers were pissed.....but everyone was great and helped out when he got fussy.

But I'm not totally happy at this clinic. We'll see. I'm hanging in....the hours are good to me.

Maybe a bit later this week I can get some new pics online. The little duker's not so little anymore.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

My parents visit was great!! But too short! Daegan had tons of fun with all the attention.

My work is so-so....I went to a conference last weekend and it reaffirmed my concerns with this clinic. So I've given them a mental time-line to update the practice and if it's not met, I'm finding a new job. I plan to inform them a little later, but more last minute....they can scramble to keep me if they want me.

Russ' work sucks. There really is no place for optimism in residency....no matter what residency it is.

Daegan is doing great. He's such a charmer. He's starting to talk more....use signs and overall just communicate better. It's making some things easier. Of course he's practicing his tantrums daily....and he can have some doozies! He's definitely a ham....likes to be the center of attention. I can sense problems with this later on.... But really he's a great kid and we'd love to have a houseful of Dukers!!

Our little Who!


One of his favorite spots...


Picking out our Christmas tree


Walking the trials at Lake Claiborne State Park


Wild Hair!!! (he just woke up like that -seriously!)


Classic "Ham" face

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

il Duce is 18 months old today. He's so much fun! The three of us have finally found a stride.....of course that means were talking about adding another. I have an appointment to have my IUD removed and as it gets closer, I'm thinking more and more about my pregnancy with Daegan....my BP, the C-section, the NICU stay and all of that jazz. I'm also reading as much as I can about VBACs and the recurrence rates for pre-e/HELLP. I'm soooo angry!! I really feel like my pre-e symptoms were neglected. I re-read one of my old posts

Hmm...you're asking today? Today...the day I spent 4 hours in L&D triage b/c of my BP and edema.... Umm....I feel OK. Overall my only pregnancy complaints had been reflux and some ankle edema (oh and the sleeping stuff)...but the edema seems to be creeping up my legs and really filling out my hands. To where it's uncomfortable to move my legs and use my hands. My BP was 159/96 when I went in today...I went in b/c the edema seemed worse and when I checked my BP at the grocery store it was 135/95 (normal pre-preg for me was 110/60). So of course, I look it up online and found out all the symptoms of pre-e and made a bunch of them fit for me....things I clearly could contribute to "just pregnancy"...like the floaty lightening bug thingies, the occ. pains in my upper belly, occ. dizziness, blurry vision, weight gain (almost 15 pounds this past month)....so after completely freaking myself out, I went to get checked out. Blood work was ok, had some protein in my urine so I have to do the 24 hour catch, and my BP went down to normal (120/75) after laying in bed hooked up to the fetal monitor for a few hours. Baby seems fine and very content...kept kicking the monitor.

Ummm...yeah I know hindsight is 20-20 but really......this should've been a bigger red flag....and maybe it was only 11 days before he was born....but 11 days of knowing that an early babe was a possibility and a couple of doses of steroids might've helped me and his lungs. I know that this situation of not knowing isn't going to happen again (I know better to listen to my gut/body - though arguably I did by going into L&D to be seen)....but it doesn't help resolve my anger at what happened. I know I should let it go and get over it...and I will....eventually, but right now I'm pissed and emotional about it. I need to talk to someone about it.....but I don't know who. Also I don't know who to go see for an OB. I want to VBAC but from everything I've heard about local OBs, it's strongly discouraged and not allowed by some. I'm going to ask the OB at my IUD removal appt, but it's the LSU clinic that has all day waits and crappy receptionists....and the folks that kinda missed my pre-e until it was HELLP. Of course they are also the only MFM/high-risk place in town. I'm just all upset and emotional right now. Maybe Russ can chat with me tonight if he doesn't get called in.....

we haven't told anyone IRL about our plans to have another one...my mom has been vocal against the issue...so I feel like I have no one to talk to....that doesn't help the issue. I know there are other message boards....but I want to talk with someone IRL....maybe it's time to find a counselor....

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

Grammy gave Daegan a singing Valentine's Day lion...and the little man loves to dance! We don't know where he learned his moves, but they are cute!

Hope this works...

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid ... 1122&hl=en

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

Well today was my IUD removal appt. Overall it went well. She was less than encouraging about my chances for a natural vaginal birth...but she wasn't negative about trying for another either. My understanding is that basically I'm very high risk for high BP again and about 30% risk of HELLP again...which kinda really sucks. If I get high blood pressure again, she alluded to admitting me until delivery....that would be less than ideal....ummm...who's going to watch Daegan?? The other sucky part is that my BP was elevated today 140/80 (not horrible, but definitely not 110/60 that I had before preg with Daegan). I'm going to monitor it over the next few weeks, but if I have developed chronic hypertension that increases my risks of PIH and HELLP. She's also checking an ANA and some other proteins, as well as a BMP and a 24hr urine protein to make sure I don't have any kidney disease, lupus or other protein deficiency as a sequella to the HELLP. She also said she would encourage weaning Daegan. Not happening. I'm not ready and I'm not weaning my very real child for a potential second child. If it affects my fertility, then we're not ready for another child. Her other concern was that I'd be nutrient deficient trying to make milk and grow a baby at the same time....I'm just going to really watch my diet....and if the baby is small on ultrasound, I'll reconsider then. She also said I'd be monitored closely...I'm not sure I'm totally happy about that (inc monitoring can lead to inc interventions) but at the same time I don't want to be ignorant and miss something.

I guess we'll have to see ow it all pans out. I should have most of my lab results by the end of this week....and now the waiting game for the return of my cycle starts.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

After all my worrying, all my labs are NORMAL!! Yay! And my BP has been NORMAL the last two times I checked it!!!

And the friend I have in town who has a little girl 1 month older than Daegan who went through HELLP at 30 weeks like me is about 15-20 weeks pregnant and her BP is NORMAL!!!



So I feel much better about the whole situation. I'm going to try to only pay attention to the happy stories and positive outcomes...


In other news, Daegan is sick. Poor kid's had a fever all night and today. A trip to the ped got him a shot and some liquid meds. Not sure where the infection is, but the general feeling is that it's bacterial. Thankfully we have no other symptoms right now (ie vomiting/diarrhea) and I hope we don't develop any. At least I get a day break from the vet clinic.

I have a seminar on babywearing tomorrow...for the local YWCA Women's Week. I hope people show up for it.

Russ is busy at the clinic and studying for OKAPs in a month. Fun, fun!

My sister's store should open soon! Her and my BIL bought a TCBY and finally got approved for the license. Hopefully it will open in the next week or two. Yummy!

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

Daegan's eyes are finally better. Poor kid has had a rough two weeks! First the fever and some vomiting, then roseola rash, then more vomiting, then the swollen purulent eyes....and he's cutting teeth! I'm exhausted! I hope he's healthy for a bit....we need some more sleep in this house!

I've been picking up a few extra shifts at work to try to make up for the days I missed when Daegan was sick. I dislike working full days! I like the extra cases I see....seems like most of the cool stuff comes in the afternoon....but it just seems so late by the time I get home....Russ has also been having long days at the clinic. We need a family weekend again!

Spring is in full bloom here and the pollens are ridiculous! I can't even go in the back yard because of the flowering bushes....I don't even know what they are, but my sinuses hate them! It also means that I've got two itchy pups in the house!

---------------------------------------------------

Parenting stuff:

I'm currently struggling with the best course of punishment for Daegan....he's 19 months old, and has entered the temper-tantrum-throwing phase. He's also in the hitting phase. If I take away something that I don't want him to have, he hits me...and if I tell him sternly "no hitting" he'll swat at me again. When I place him in time-out (he won't walk there himself so I have to pick him up and carry him there - I try to do it gently - I don't drag him or anything) he'll either swat at me again, or he'll kick and arch so I can't sit him down. If I can't get him to sit, I'll lay him down in time-out...when he swats, I just reiterate "no hitting". I think let him sit for about a minute. Sometimes he'll cry, sometimes he'll sit and be calm and quiet, sometimes he'll bang his head against the wall. After time-out is over, I walk over to him, ask him to tell me he's sorry (he'll usually sign "sorry" and give me a hug) and then let him out of time out. It's not curbing the behavior at all. He's still swatting at me/hitting me many times a day....sometimes I'll ask him to say sorry instead of time out....but he's in time-out 3-4 times a day most days. I feel like I must be doing something wrong because that seems like a lot for such a young guy. I'm trying really hard to be consistent, calm....and I'm doing a pretty good job at it....I rarely raise my voice (in regards to this) and I'm trying to keep my phrasing short (ie "no hitting"). I wonder if there is something else I could do, or if this is maybe just a phase and it'll get better....

I also think his tantrums are destructive sometimes...where he'll throw himself down and kick at the wall/whatever hard and repetitive...or he'll hit himself when he's mad. I don't know exactly what to do during those times....do I pick him up and try to soothe him, do I let him scream it out, do I try to stop the tantrum without touching him?? I think it's got to be good for him to get his frustrations out somehow....so he doesn't resort to violence (like hitting, it's working so well! or biting).....but should he be learning a better coping mechanism than laying on the floor kicking and screaming?? Is he too young to really understand coping??

I'm probably totally over analyzing normal toddler boy behavior, but I just don't know. My mom had two fairly mild mannered girls so she's no help.

And I'm ready to transition him out of our bed, but I guess he's not. He was doing well before he got sick and then when he was sick he was back in the bed....now when I try to lay him in the crib he has a fit! I'm not ready to let him cry it out in there, but I'm not sure what else to do....I end up giving in...oh well....maybe he's just still not feeling well. I'll give it some more time.

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

OKAPs (boards) suck! He's in that nervous/freaking out/ bitchy bear mode. I'm sure he's going to do fine, but he's really worried. April 26th so just over 3 more weeks of this!!! Thankfully my mom and sister arrive in just under a week!!! His mood is soo volatile when he's stressed about a test.......add that to sleep deprivation from studying and LOOK OUT! At least the time is finite!! Only 27 more days to go! We can do it. I will not kill him!

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

I take it back....I just may kill him!!! Yesterday started out like a lovely day. I woke up, go ready for work, sat down and ate breakfast with Daegan......during which he made the sign for 'potty' and said "potty" so I asked him if he had to go potty. He replied with a nod, and proceeded to try to get out of his highchair. Figuring this is going to be a game because we've never talked about potty training AT ALL and I don't really know how he even KNOWS about going potty (seeing us, I guess).....I take him to the bathroom, strip his bottom half and perch him on the toilet. HE PEED! Then he signed 'all done.' Of course, when I was trying to put his diaper back on him he fell forward and conked his head on the bowl! I guess that should've been my first clue of the day's true nature....

I got to work and got sick during surgery and almost passed out! That NEVER happens to me....I felt over heated, I was sweating, and oh-so nauseated. I spent the rest of the day feeling like puking and generally crappy. I get Daegan at the end of the day, head home, make dinner that I'm not going to eat.....Russ requested cookies, so I made those too....then Russ ran away to PLAY VIDEO GAMES! And bitched and moaned when I requested help with Daegan, who fell asleep swimmingly, but then woke up just as I finally dozed off and wouldn't go back to sleep. Why do I have to be the one to struggle to get him to fall back asleep when he's just playing video games??? It'd be a little different if he was studying, but he was playing cheesy computer games for over 2 hours (at the point I asked for help). Umm....then he proceeded to bitch to me that I "was supposed to leave him alone this week for studying." And I needed to pretend he wasn't there/ignore him. If he was STUDYING I would've given him space....but he was PLAYING GAMES and I was sick and tired and needed to get some sleep!!!


Ugh.....doctor entitlement bullshit! :banghead:


At least Daegan went on the potty!
(Oh and after reading all the threads in the parenting section, I am FULLY aware this could've been a freak occurrence never to be seen again....or at least for another year or two!)

[Michele]

Re: Doctor. Doctor.

Daegan has again peed on the potty!! This second time was prompted though, but still! I'm impressed with the little guy.

He's such a ham for the camera now!







I also took the plunge and chopped my hair! The before is a layered cut with the longest layers being almost to my waist (when did it get that long???). (excuse the flatness of it, I had it in a bun and took it out just for the pics)....and the after....finally was able to cut off most of the dyed part....and when did my hair get so curly??




Russ has found his big boy drawers and has been less of an ass....only 3 more days til OKAPs. I'm going to a vet pharma dinner tonight at a fancy restaurant! And Daegan's going to the sitter. Yay! Italian! Yum!!