What do you do all day?

[mommax3]

My youngest son Nathan turned six on Friday. He was born on a Friday, too, so somehow the memories really came rolling back this weekend. He is such a delightful child. He is the one most like DH and I, and because of that, he seems to be the easiest *so far* (did I just jinx myself? ) to parent. It is funny to type that as I remember what a hard, hard baby he was. He cried all. the. time! I thought I would lose my mind. He didn't smile for weeks, and even then, he was a miser with them.....he did not dole them out generously at all. We watched old video of all the kids recently.....Nathan cried during his first, second, and third birthday celebrations due to being overwhelmed by either the cake, the candles, or the singing. He would have been a very happy oldest child, but he had a rough row to hoe being the youngest of three boys. He is very careful and cautious (although much less so now) and had zero ability to "roll with it" as a baby and toddler. I spent most of his first year on the edge of despair mainly due to lack of sleep (and living in Wichita Falls, TX!) and never would have dreamed what a delightful child he would become. Over the past six months, he has become obsessed with the piano and the keyboard that we have. I started him in piano lessons this summer, way earlier than I started the other boys, and he FLEW through his first book and is halfway through his second. He plays the piano or the keyboard for at least an hour every day....not all at once, but he spends a LOT of time there. It will be interesting to see where that interest takes him. He is reading like a champ (Junie B. is a current favorite) and loves anything to do with numbers. He is an interesting guy and I am SO GLAD we had him!

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

ARRRGH! I hate DH's job this weekend. He has been at work ALL WEEKEND. He was home for four hours on Saturday afternoon, but other than that, it has been all hospital, all the time.

To further enhance my weekend, I was at Kohl's on Saturday morning with DSs #1 and #3. They both need clothes for fall....jeans and pants and long-sleeved shirts. They also need shoes. DS #2 had stayed all night with a friend and they were going to bring him home around noon. I was hoping DH would be home by then so I wouldn't have to quit shopping, but about 11:50 I got the call that he wouldn't make it, so I made a bee-line for the check out area, and amazingly enough found a checker with no line. We got in the car, I turned the ignition, and ......nothing. *&%$. So I call the mom of the friend that Joel is with and explain the predicament. She says she will send her husband (who used to work for GM and still works in the industry) to Kohl's with Joel to help me. So we wait. The guy gets there, tightens the connections to the battery, and the car starts. But it keeps dying. So he says he will follow me to the garage where we take our vehicles. Picture me gunning the Suburban out of a parking place at Kohl's in order to keep it from dying. NOT EASY! Once I was giving it gas regularly, it was fine. I had been on the phone with DH intermittently through this time and he was finally leaving the hospital, so I told him to meet us at the garage. He did, and we left the Suburban there, then all piled into DH's car to go to the airport and get a rental until the Suburban is fixed. One thing I dislike about the area where we live is that there are NO car rental places, except for one at a car dealership that has such narrow hours that it is hardly worth considering. We do live pretty close to the airport, but not so close that it is convenient to run over there when your car is in the shop. Whatever. So we rented a Toyota 4Runner.....we know the Suburban's days are numbered (it has almost 170K miles) and we are forever considering what we will get next. It won't be a 4Runner. I know I am spoiled and politically incorrect, but honestly, it feels like a small car after what I have become used to. The ride is rough and the interior is really cramped. Now we know, I guess. So that was how I wasted 2.5 hours (that I didn't have to waste) on Saturday. DH went back to work about two hours after we got home from renting the car (and he slept most of the time he was home) and he has just now walked in (at 2:45 Sunday) for the first time since then. The house is a wreck because we had the dining room ceiling painted on Friday due to a roof leak we have had that is finally fixed. Our dining room table, chairs, and the shelving unit we have for piano music (along with all of the music) is crammed into the living room, and the buffet and piano are shoved together in the middle of the dining room. We need to get all of that put back, and we also need to get the laundry finished. I haven't had a minute free and clear all weekend, and I still need to get DSs #2 and #3 some clothes and all three of them need some shoes. This week is state testing in Indiana, which means that I work some full days to help out, and the schedule is completely screwy when I do work. DH and I would like to take the kids and go away next weekend, but I can't find anyplace at this late date that has any vacancies.....I was hoping for a cabin in the woods or something like that.....remote and relaxing. DH's birthday was Wednesday and we have hardly even celebrated it.

This is why I constantly question my decision to work. At this point, we have plenty of money and no time to spend it....honestly. (Probably why we have gotten so much debt paid off. ) In a regular week, I have maybe two conversations with DH.....and we are doing well if we have that many. He has tomorrow afternoon off, as well as next Friday, but I don't, so there is no time to get caught up. Getting up on Monday morning feels like starting a marathon that doesn't end until Friday when I get the kids home from school, and I am exhausted. Ahhhh, the glamourous life I dreamed of during residency........Guess what? I'm still dreaming. Hopefully things will work out for the upcoming weekend.

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

So, new month.....temps still in the 80s here in the midwest. What is up with that? Not really complaining, but it kinda feels like we're back in TX....north TX, at least.

I already posted elsewhere about my aunt's medical condition, so I won't re-post it all here, but the short of it is that she is 89 years old, on dialysis, diagnosed with a tumor, and unable to tolerate enough chemo to make any kind of a difference. She has had a good life and is in good spirits. The doctor has given her anywhere from 1 month to 1 year. We have planned a family get-together at her apartment for the Saturday after Tgiving, so I hope she has more than one month. She also has the option of quitting dialysis if the cancer makes her miserable. I am pretty sad about this, even though at her age it is to be expected. She and I are very close, and I am mourning the things I will not be able to share with her. She would LOVE to be in on all of the things I will be deciding about the house we are going to build. I will miss talking about all of it with her. It is hard to lose people who have loved you your whole life.

We met with the builder that we are probably going to use on Friday. We sketched out the house we think we want and got some ballpark figures. It really isn't that outrageous, but a big enough number that I am a little freaked out. I think nothing about blowing money at Target on *crap*, but spending BIG money on something substantial freaks me out. Anyone with me on this? I am struggling with all sorts of philosophical questions, like "how much of a house do you need, anyway?" and "what does NEED mean?" and "how many people could you help if you spent X amount less on your house?".....it just goes on and on. Part of my deal is that apparently DH and his partner are doing quite a bit better than I realized and DH's salary (potentially) may get quite a bit higher than it was during his salary guarantee period (which ended this past summer). All the numbers aren't in yet, so I told DH to let me know when he has some solid numbers to show me and then we can talk about this house again.

Two more weeks of soccer, then a break before basketball begins. My first concert at school is October 17th.....feeling the first twinges of nervousness about it, just because that is how I am. The kids this year are really doing a great job, and I am enjoying them

That's about it from here for now!

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Well, the first concert is *tomorrow* and if I do say so myself, I am holding it together remarkably well! I think the kids will do fine and I am actually looking forward to the whole thing.

The older two boys had their last soccer game last night, and we have one magical week before basketball starts. Their Fall Break is Thursday and Friday (of course, mine is NEXT Thursday and Friday....how convenient ) and then Monday there is a parent meeting and practices start on Tuesday. So here we go again!

I had conferences with each of my childrens' teachers this afternoon and they all went pretty well. My middle son has struggled a bit in school since we moved here and finally this year I feel like he is back where he was, confidence-wise, in first grade, the last "good" year I feel like he has had. Too bad it took him until fourth grade to get his groove back! Ironically, I think that playing on the soccer team has helped him a lot. He went toe-to-toe with the big kids all season, and got lots of kudos for that and for his quickness. The practices and games certainly impacted his study time, but I think the confidence he regained has made up for that lack.

We are planning our first trip to Disney World (as a family) for the week following New Years. I am so excited about it! I have wanted to take the kids for years, but when we were in TX, it was too far to contemplate driving, and we didn't have the money to fly. I had started to think we would never make it while ds#1 was young enough to care, but he is 12....I think he will still have a good time. They don't know yet.

I have a link to some pictures of "the house" we are thinking about building. There was a home show here locally and we saw this house (by the builder we are going to use) and really, really liked it. It isn't *exactly* how we want it..... we are going to tweak it some to make it fit our family better. The house in the pictures has a walk-out basement, which I don't think will work on our lot (although the builder thinks *maybe* we could make a walkout on one corner) so the back of our house won't look like the pictures, but it gives a basic idea of at least some of it. We will have a full basement with a kitchenette, family area, bedroom, bath, and exercise room. The kitchen is going to have to be redesigned to have a little more storage than the one in the pictures, and we are going to move one complete exterior wall out about 10 feet to make the garage deeper, expand the laundry/mud room area, add a tub in the master bath, (although the shower in there is awesome....but sometimes I just want a bubble bath, you know?) and give us a little more square footage in the master bedroom. We are so grateful that all of the rooms we wanted to enlarge were along the same wall! I am really NOT a spatial person, so seeing this house already built is a huge help to me. I can't believe we will be building for real a year from now. Anyway, here is the link. http://public.propertylinx.com/templ...MlsNum=2734825

Life is pretty good right now. I am busier than I would like, but I think it is just part of having school-aged kids.

Sally

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

So the concert is now history. It went fine, and I had lots of help from both parents and other teachers. This year is SO much easier than last. My kids were cute and sang well. No one said "Teste 1, 2, 3" into the microphone.

My kids have been on fall break the past two days. DH took the day off yesterday, and they were on their own this morning until I got home at 1. My middle and youngest sons had friends (brothers) over this afternoon, and then I took all five boys (my three plus the two friends) out for pizza before taking the friends home. DH is working an in-house shift tonight, so I have been a posting fiend. Next week is MY fall break, but before I get to the "break" part, I have to facilitate 18 student-led conferences for the kids in my homeroom. I didn't have a homeroom last year, but because our school population is growing, they had to give me one this year in order to keep the homerooms as small as they want them to be. I have a half-day Wednesday, with students, and then will be in conferences from 1 to 8. Thursday is a half-day for the students also, with that afternoon off, and all day Friday off as well. (The silver lining to my kids being off this week is that when I am off next week, my time will be my own!) Because I am a half-time employee, I will get to take the whole day off Thursday, to compensate for working the equivalent of three half days on Wednesday, AND I will have another half day off, to be taken at my discretion. SWEET! So I am looking forward to the second half of next week! I have to point out that I would not have realized that I got the extra time off if my principal hadn't told me. He is really a good guy. So is the ass't. principal....actually, there isn't anyone on staff at my school that I don't like. That is a RARE thing, in my experience.

My middle son has decided not to play basketball on the school team. I don't really care, either way, but he will end up going to all the games anyway, since my oldest is playing. All the other (four) boys in his class will be on the team, so I hope he doesn't end up feeling left out. He has never really cared about basketball, though. The fourth graders will be on the bench most of the time, but I think they will learn a lot in practice. Oh, well, I imagine he could join after the fact if he changes his mind.

DH is on call this weekend for the second weekend in a row....weird schedule glitch. He has had the previous three weekends off, so I can't really complain, but I will anyway. I hope he gets to sleep tonight so he can have a nice day with us tomorrow, when he isn't answering pages, that is.

My thoughts are with Kate and her family tonight. Her strength in the face of all she has had to deal with is impressive and inspiring. I hope she made some good memories today. May God bless all of them.

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Time for an update, although not much is new....the chaos is ever-present.

Basketball has started for Luke and Joel, and they practice twice a week from 5:30 to 7:30. So much for having dinner as a family.....but hey, even if its drive-through crap, at least we are eating it together, right? DH is working an in-house shift tonight, which is a bummer, but he has tomorrow off. (Wish I did!)

My Fall Break was last Thursday and Friday, and while I enjoyed myself immensely, it didn't feel like a break since my kids still had to be taken to school and picked up. I wasn't exactly footloose and fancy free! We did go out Friday night with some friends to The Melting Pot and had a great time. I was feeling kind of low on Sunday (mostly to do with my aunt, who is not doing well) so DH took me to a movie Monday night after he got home.....the kids had their homework done, so we put the oldest in charge and just went! It feels weird to be able to do that. We went to Chipotle for a quick dinner and then saw "Michael Clayton", which was really, really good. George Clooney on the big screen would be enough for me even if he were just standing there, but I think he is a pretty good actor, too.

One of my 7th grade students (girl) was killed in a car wreck Monday night. She went on a quick ride with her neighbor and his girlfriend (high school students) because the guy had just gotten a new stereo put in his car. He was speeding, went over a little hill, lost control, and hit a tree. He and his girlfriend were in the front seat, wore their seatbelts, and were treated and released that same night. Tabitha was in the back and didn't wear her seatbelt. She had massive head injuries. The kids have been all over the place this week as a result. So sad. The visitation is tomorrow afternoon and I am dreading it.

I have a collection of pictures that I have been meaning to post, so in no particular order, here they are.

Nathan on his birthday in September:


another one of Nathan:


Luke trying to be cool:


I need to get one of Joel up here, too!

Not much else is new. I really miss you guys and wish I had time to post more often!

Sally

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

I felt bad that I didn't get any pictures of Joel in my earlier post, so.....

Here is the proud owner of a new pair of glasses (his first)


and another one


DH and I went to the school auction tonight. WE WON A FREE YEAR OF TUITION! For the cost of a $20 raffle ticket! Awesome! I also got a bike! I don't know much about bikes, but I have been wanting one, since I am the only one in the family that doesn't have one. This one is a Trek, with a wide comfy seat, and it is pink. The lady who donated it is older (late 60s) and just didn't like it after she got it. It looks brand new, and we got it for $250. With it being pink, I don't think the boys will ride off on it!

So here are a couple of pictures of DH and I before we left this evening.




It was a fun evening. We met some nice people, including a couple who are currently building in the neighborhood where we will be building. Their kids are around the age of Nathan, so that will be nice when we move out there.

I went to the visitation for my student this evening. So sad. Her family is just destroyed, you can tell. They are a little on the rough side, I think....they were all wearing jeans and sweatshirts and reeked of smoke. They barely know me at all and as soon as I walked up, her mom hugged me and started sobbing about how much Tabitha loved to sing. Poor people....their world has been turned upside down.

Basketball tournament this weekend.....they've only had three practices, but why not?

Sally

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

My aunt passed away a week ago today. She was 89 years old, on dialysis, and had cancer on her one remaining (non-working) kidney. She was ready to go. But still, it has been very hard. She began to go downhill just one week before she died, on the 19th. We had planned a post-Thanksgiving family get-together with her on Saturday, the 24th, and we went ahead and did that. Although she was in bed and on some pretty powerful drugs by that point, she spoke to each of us and told us she loved us. She was gone less than 48 hours later. I got the call last Monday morning at 7:15. I went to my school and made a sub plan, and arrived at her apartment just as she was being brought out in a body bag. Why couldn't I have hit a couple of red lights? The rest of the day was spent making phone calls, planning her funeral service, and beginning the process of packing up the apartment she had lived in for over 30 years. Her funeral was last Friday, and as of today, her apartment is almost completely empty. I am physically and emotionally depleted. It has been draining to be responsible for dismantling the trappings of my aunt's life. I have packed boxes and boxes of stuff, and have made countless trips to Goodwill. DH packed a U-Haul full of stuff that we (my sisters and I) wanted to keep before the visitation Thursday night, drove it back here afterwards, and unloaded it in the freezing cold Friday morning, before coming home to get ready for the funeral. I taught three days last week because I have a concert coming up next week and didn't feel like I could take any more time. Today, I went back over to her town because the dealer who bought her stuff was coming to pack it all up. It is surreal to see her apartment EMPTY. I know it is completely irrational, but today while I was there I kept expecting her to come around the corner and wonder where all of her stuff was. Her apartment was the only constant that remained of my childhood. My parents are not in the same houses where I grew up, but my aunt's apartment the day she died was pretty much the same as it was when I was 10 years old and would spend a week at a time with her in the summer. So it is wrenching to see it all packed up and taken away, especially when I am the one responsible for it all.

My other sad news is that my half-sister, who is expecting, has gotten bad news about her baby. At her ultrasound, it was discovered that the baby's heart only had two chambers. Since then, some genetic testing has been done, and it seems that this is an issue with chromosome 10 (extra material???) and while the heart defect isn't as bad as it was originally thought, the baby will also likely have growth restriction and retardation. There is a 50% chance that all of my sister and BIL's babies will have this problem. So that really sucks, too.

Life does go on, even when sad things are happening. Keeping all of the plates spinning in extreme circumstances is SO HARD! My boys are doing well, and work for me is going fine. My colleagues have been very supportive over the past week, with both my principal and ass't principal driving an hour and a half out of their way last Thursday night to come to the visitation at the funeral home. My principal had to cover one of my classes on the day my aunt died, and he actually rehearsed the choir. I really work with great people.

I am SO behind in the rest of my life that it isn't even funny. I *think* my choirs will be ready for their concert, but as for being ready for the holidays.....I almost break out in hives when I think about that. DH has been so wonderful....he has really stepped up, and has been very protective of my time and has shouldered a lot of the load that would have otherwise been on me, despite being on call all last weekend. I think the hardest part of this whole experience is behind us, although the grieving will continue for a while.

I have not even had time to read most of the posts here, but one of these days (I hope!) I will get caught back up.

Sally

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

I am *drowning* in life. Completely overwhelmed. Our Christmas tree is up, but not decorated. I don't think I will be sending out any Christmas cards. I still need to write thank-you notes for my aunt's funeral stuff. I am to the point where there are so many things that need attention that I just feel frozen in place. I am trying to spend some quality time with my youngest....damage control! He totally got shunted off to the side by both DH and I from the week of Thanksgiving until this week. The other two are older and in basketball, etc., but Nathan is still pretty focused on mom and dad, and we just kept saying "find something to do" whenever he needed attention. It got to the point where he was taking whatever kind of attention he could get from us....and he was acting like a brat to get it! This week has been better. Poor guy.

BUT -- I am taking the day off tomorrow, and DH is off as well. (Of course, he is in-house tonight, so no guarantees that he will be worth anything tomorrow!) I am hoping to finish Christmas shopping. We did a TON of shopping online last weekend, but there are quite a few more things to get. The bummer is that our oldest two sons have a basketball game tomorrow night. I really don't think Friday night games are necessary for kids younger than high school age. But hey, no one asked me, right?

I think DH and I are getting each other a new computer and ipods, but I don't know if we will have time to pick it all out before Christmas. We really need the computer! I use DH's work computer exclusively because our other computer is so old and slow it makes me crazy.

My in-laws are coming into town in a week. I get along with them very well, so no angst there, but my house is a *serious* wreck. I have a good friend here who is quitting her job, and has had a cleaning lady she has loved....she will be letting her go since she will be staying home, so I got her number and called her. Of course she hasn't called back.

We had three work-related parties last weekend....2 for him and 1 for me. Exhausting. I am just not feeling it this year, so far at least. At DH's office party, the doc (FP) who was hosting it divided us into groups (I was not with DH, btw, which was kind of the point, I guess) and made us rotate into three different rooms and play games. I am just not a games girl. And if I go to my husband's office party, I would like to hang out with my husband, thankyouverymuch. It was a long weekend, and not particularly relaxing.

My students had their holiday concert Tuesday night. It was this concert that kept me focused during the time of my aunt's death. I knew I couldn't miss too much school because the kids needed to rehearse. I am so relieved that it is over, but now that I am not focused on that, I am having part two of grieving. My aunt always had such fun going to Wal-Mart with me and picking out presents for the boys. I will miss doing that with her.

We are going to FL the week after Christmas. All the boys know is that we are going to visit my Dad, who lives in Clearwater. The truth is that we are going to Disney World for most of the week. The boys have never been there....we never could afford it before.....and I haven't been there since I was six! I think we will tell the boys this weekend. I hope our time there isn't totally chaotic, or if it is, I hope that just getting away for awhile will be the break that I need.

I am reading posts as often as I can, but I have a feeling it is going to take me some time to feel like I am caught up enough to post. I *really* appreciated the nice posts and PMs you all sent me after my aunt's death.....sorry I haven't been able to respond! I am starting to see a light at the end of this busy tunnel I am stuck in.....but it is still far away.

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Well, it looks like we are going to have a real blizzard here! I am pretty excited about it, mostly because it will force us to stay home and get the tree decorated. DH went out this morning for groceries, and I added cookie-making stuff to his list.....that is on the agenda for tomorrow.

We have plans with friends both tonight and tomorrow, but I think we are just going to play it by ear because of the weather. Most of the Christmas shopping is done, which is a huge relief. Thank God for online shopping! DH's parents will be here Thursday, and we are all going to see "Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat" at a local theatre next weekend. I am pretty excited about that.....it is a GREAT musical for kids, and my kids already know the soundtrack pretty well. It will be fun to watch them when we go.

We told the kids about Disney World last night. My oldest got tears in his eyes, along with a huge grin on his face. They really are at great ages for this trip.

I am fighting my third upper respiratory "thing" in the past month. This one distinguishes itself by a constant tickle in my throat.....very annoying. It almost feels like it is going to turn into laryngitis, which would make it kind of hard for me to do my job! Oh well, the concert is over, so the pressure is off. Just five more days until a much needed two-week break.

Sally

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Well, we are back from Disney. What an ordeal! I am glad we did it, but I am glad it is behind us, honestly. We did four parks in 3.5 days (but that really was more like 3 days because we slept in one morning, and then went to a movie, so we didn't get to the park until after lunch) and it was CROWDED and the first couple of days were really cold.
Watching the boys take it all in, though, was priceless. We spent the first day at Disney/MGM, and I don't think the temps made it out of the 40s. Brrrr. The boys got to go on both of the coasters there and we made it through an evening show that was really awesome.....but it was frigid indeed by the time we were done. The next morning, we wimped out and went to see Nat'l Treasure 2 in Downtown Disney (after sleeping in) since it was still really cold and windy. We ate lunch at a Wolfgang Puck restaurant after that (great food but horrible service) and then headed to Epcot. We did the front section of Epcot and just a few of the countries.....I guess I wouldn't mind going back to that park sometime. That evening, we went to a dinner/show ("Hoop De Doo Revue") that was a lot of fun, but didn't start until 9:30. It wasn't over until close to midnight, and then the bus we needed to take never showed up. After 30 minutes (again in the cold and wind) a bus headed somewhere else took pity on us and picked us up. Friday, we started out at the Animal Kingdom. The weather was much more cooperative and we all enjoyed our time there. We left there about 2 and went over to the Magic Kingdom (or stroller central). We spent the rest of Friday and Saturday from 9 to 2 there, and managed to accomplish everything that everyone wanted to do. I never thought I would say this, but I was thankful not to have daughters that were into the princess thing. The boys just want to keep moving. They don't want to meet characters or pretend. I can deal with that. My hat is off to parents who take babies and young children in strollers to Disney. No way could I do it. There were times that nausea swept over me as I realized how much the vacation was costing along with how much DH & I were NOT relaxing or even having that much fun. But the kids really did like it, and once the temperatures got into the sixties, DH and I had fun, too. The boys thanked us multiple times, and I know we made some great memories. We stayed off-site, in a place called Floridays Resort, and I would definitely recommend it to anyone. DH splurged and reserved a 3 br suite, which was really nice....we had plenty of room to spread out and relax....when we were there, that is!

The plane rides to and from were uneventful. We actually flew into Tampa (my Dad lives in Clearwater) and spent the first and last nights of our vacation with him. We went to a beach on New Year's Day, and the boys immediately betrayed themselves as northerners by jumping in the waves as though it was 85 and sunny instead of 65 with a cool wind. They loved it.....pics later. My Dad moved to FL in the spring of 2005 and this is the first time I have been down to see him but I think I will try to get back down there soon. He rents a condo in a retirement community called Top of the World, and although his current condo is going to be sold, he hopes to find another one in the same community. DH and I both commented that we wouldn't mind living in a retirement community ourselves! We are such nerds. We had a nice visit with my Dad, and he introduced us to the "lady friend" that he met while playing a gig at a local Moose Lodge. She was very nice and it was really good to see him with someone that treated him well. (It was also good to see him with someone his own age....a new one for me, since my mom is 13 years younger and my ex-stepmother is 23 years younger.) My ex-stepmother was really pretty ugly verbally to my dad for most of the years they were married (28 years) and the tension that caused for me made it hard for me to be around my Dad. I was nervous before meeting his new friend, and after I realized that she was actually kind to him, I almost got tears in my eyes. Such a relief. My Dad has not always made good choices, but his worst ones are many years in the past. I am happy he has someone like this in his life now.

I am not too excited about going back to school tomorrow....back to the grind. DH and I kind of had a blow-up about our hectic lives, and he told me to quit after this year. There is a part of me that would welcome a less-stressful existence, but another part of me fights to have something that is mine, where I am somebody besides the "wife" or the "mom". I think, too, that I need to feel a certain amount of pressure (i.e. stress) before I do my best work, and my job definitely provides that! I am good at what I do and get good evaluations. If my job became full time, I would definitely resign, but I think I will try to keep the job as long as it is part time. My principal is leaving after this year, and the superintendent is retiring as well. In addition, my colleagues and I will be moving into a new building in the fall of '09. I know there will be changes that will come as a result of all of that, and I am curious to see where those lead. So in the meantime, we are getting a cleaning lady and DH and I are going to try and schedule more time with each other, and hopefully we will take a trip together (just the two of us!) sometime this year.

Now, off to do laundry......happy 2008 to all of us!

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

During our trip to Disney, I had a lot of time for uninterrupted thought while standing in line for various attractions, and I realized that DH and I are roughly halfway through our parenting journey. Luke is 12.5 (actually a little more) and we have about 12.5 more years until Nathan graduates from high school. I know we won't stop feeling like parents when he graduates, but by that time, the biggest part of our jobs as mom and dad will be done. I told this to DH and he said "12.5 years seems like a long time ago", and it does seem like a long time since Luke was born. I have a feeling that the next 12.5 years will go a lot faster!

I have struggled a lot with the end of having babies and preschoolers and toddlers. They are a LOT of work, but for me, those years were really rewarding. The school age years, for me anyway, not so much. Lots of driving here and there and laundry and making sure homework gets done, but no more first moments or watching the kids discover the world.....I guess they still are, but in a much different way. Anyway, I have recently realized that what I want isn't to go back.....I think it would kill me (literally! ) to be schlepping a baby/toddler around to all the boys' activities. I am just recognizing (and mourning) the loss of those years that seemed (at the time) like they would go on forever. I am trying to embrace this stage of life, too.....can't say I am quite there yet, but saying goodbye to the previous stage is probably a good first step.

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

My grandmother passed away around noon today. She was 96 and had been declining recently, and had been in the hospital for the past week. She died in her sleep with her five kids around her bed....you can't ask for much more than that, really.

This isn't hitting me as hard as my aunt's death. I wasn't as close to my grandmother. She wasn't really a warm person, although I know she loved her family and was very proud of all of us. She moved in with my mom (and basically took over) when I moved out to go to college, and I think I probably have some unresolved feelings about that.

My mom has never lived alone, and I think she is really going to enjoy it, once she gets through the shock of the change. I am looking forward to spending more time with her, and I think my kids are going to enjoy feeling like they have a grandma close by!

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Well, it is official....we are slobs. I am almost embarrassed to post about this, but who cares, right? I have shared everything else!

My cleaning lady started today. I had interviewed her here at the house a couple of weeks ago. We agreed on every other week, I told her what I wanted her to do for sure each time, and she took a look around. She said she would do everything (mop tile floors in a large kitchen + laundry room + entry way + 3.5 baths; clean the bathrooms, clean the kitchen; dust and vacuum the living areas and bedrooms....it is a 3100 sq. ft. house and I have 3 kids, 3 cats, and 1 dog ) for $60.00. Ooookay.

So, today....she got here around 8:30 and was still here at 1:30 when I got home from work. I ran some errands, picked up the boys from school, waited through a piano lesson, and got home around 4:00. She was still here. She left at 4:40, chagrined that she hadn't been able to vacuum the upstairs bonus room and bedroom, or the secondary bedrooms downstairs. The house is so clean! :stars: :stars: I felt bad that she was here for so long, but she says the first time is always the longest....although she did finally say she would accept 10 more dollars.

I am thrilled that we have found someone so thorough. I hope we haven't scared her off! DH is going to be in heaven!

[mommax3]

Re: What do you do all day?

Wow, two posts in one day to my blog....hard to believe!

My grandmother's funeral was yesterday and everything went well. Her whole family was there....5 kids, 17 grandkids, 18 great-grandkids, and 1 great-great-grandchild (there is another one on the way, too). She was a special lady, very intelligent and energetic. She never got tired of learning.

I am worn down from the events of the weekend, and just the daily grind. I am taking a bunch of students to Solo & Ensemble Contest this Saturday, as well as getting my (older) private students ready to compete in more difficult divisions at the same Contest, so this is a busy week for me. We had lots of absences last week at my school (about 75 - 80 a day, at a school of 425) so the kids aren't as prepared as they (or I) would like, and a couple of their parents are driving me up the wall. I debate every year about participating in this contest....a lot of teachers only enter the kids who take private lessons....but I think it is such a good opportunity for kids who are figuring out what they are good at. This may be the year that does me in, though.

My older two sons just have 2.5 weeks left of basketball! Nathan is going to play in a pee-wee league through school, but it only lasts 6 weeks or something, and it is all at the school.....no driving across town. The summer camp flyers have come out and the planning for that has begun. I need to see if my in-laws want to take the boys for a week this summer, and what their schedule looks like if they do. DH's whole family is vacationing together in Sanibel the last week of July in honor of my ILs 40th wedding anniversary. I am looking forward to that, but every year at this time, I get the edge of panic that the summer is going to disappear without my family getting to do anyting substantial. I always try to stay one step ahead DH's call schedule, so he plans his calls around what we want to do, instead of the opposite.

I feel a little detatched at work right now, and don't really know why. My principal is leaving at the end of the year, so the talk is ramping up about who will replace him....I can't get too excited about it. Most of the teachers there have been there for years (as has the principal) and are very invested in what comes next. It truly is the end of the era....my principal's *father* was also a principal in my building. I can see how some change might be a good thing, but I keep that opinion to myself. My principal is a great guy and I doubt I would have come back to work for anyone else. He is a truly kind man.

Well, that's it for my exciting life right now! My youngest lost one of his front teeth (his brother "assisted" in getting it out AT THE FUNERAL HOME ) and he immediately looks *way* older. My babies are growing up! I need to post some pictures!

Sally