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Getting baby to sleep alone

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  • Getting baby to sleep alone

    Christine,
    to you. I have no advice as my DD is almost 2.5 and still sleeps with us and DS slept with us until he was 3. If you really want to transition him out of the bed, there might be a little crying at first. Our cousins who did this at 6 months had a couple of weeks of crying but now their DS sleeps in his own crib through the nite. Hope you find a solution that works best for all of you.

  • #2
    The Baby Whisperer...I didn't like that book, not one bit.

    The No-Cry Sleep Solution has some more flexible ideas for easing the kiddo into a new routine.

    I don't have a lot of advice since at six months we've just started the process of looking for a crib (and making a place to put it!) Right now Edward doesn't even like sleeping in his sidecar bassinet though, so I don't know how well this will work.

    I don't think nursing to sleep is a bad thing at all, personally! It's different for every family of course, but I really think that there's a reason that it works so well for the baby to be soothed by a full belly and comfortable sucking. It just becomes a problem if that's the ONLY way the baby EVER falls asleep and he's completely conditioned that sleep requires sucking. Then you have to work extra hard to help him learn new associations and fade the sucking-to-sleep one.

    Right now Edward is so interested in crawling that he can't nurse to sleep lying down anymore -- if he's on the bed awake, he is crawling! Even if he's exhausted. So we nurse (sitting up) until he's full, and then bounce until he's asleep. I put him down and his eyes flutter and sometimes he looks at me but he quickly falls asleep. So that gives me hope that when I try to put him down in a crib in a couple of weeks, he'll sleep then too!

    Anyway, I think I'm rambling. Good luck to you and I feel your pain!
    Alison

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    • #3
      We have a guest room that sees fairly frequent use. We also aren't that shy about just letting him sleep soundly on his own half of the bed while we...use...the other half.

      Isn't it funny to think of rolling on your child once you've been in the habit of sleeping with them for a while?

      The reasons I'm interested in at least making a good attempt at transitioning DS to his own bed (and probably room) are because he's getting big and wiggly and tough to sleep with (and conversely, he seems to sleep better if he can spread out and not touch anyone!), and because he is going to crawl off the bed someday soon and I'm going to feel guilty.

      But I don't think it's anything worth really rushing over. These months are such a blip in the long run, and I am completely positive that Eddy won't be going to college still sleeping in Mommy and Daddy's bed.
      Alison

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      • #4
        Originally posted by spotty_dog
        I don't think nursing to sleep is a bad thing at all, personally! It's different for every family of course, but I really think that there's a reason that it works so well for the baby to be soothed by a full belly and comfortable sucking. It just becomes a problem if that's the ONLY way the baby EVER falls asleep and he's completely conditioned that sleep requires sucking.
        ITA.

        DS is now 17 months old, and still nurses to sleep at night most of the time. I feel like this is ok because (1) he consistently sleeps through the night, so it seems to me that when he wakes during the night he's able to put himself back to sleep and (2) on the occasion that he doesn't fall asleep during nursing and I put him down in his crib awake, he'll roll around and talk to himself and eventually fall asleep on his own. Since I know that he can fall asleep without nursing, I'm ok with having him fall asleep while nursing. Does that make sense? :huh:

        Anyway, if The Baby Whisperer didn't work for you (I never read it), you might have to try different methods to hit on something that will work for you. Or, you might have to just accept the fact that it might be a rough transition and he might cry for a little while. I personally swear by Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child but I know a lot of people disagree with some of the methods outlined in the book. I put DS in his crib around 4 months, and for all of my worrying about how it was going to go and what was going to happen ... it turned out to be a complete non-issue. He slept exactly the same in the crib as he did with me! It took a lot of work, but we got through it and so will you. As Alison said, he won't still be sleeping with you when he's ready for college.

        ~Jane

        -Wife of urology attending.
        -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

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        • #5
          I nursed all my kids to sleep at some point or another. DD#3 didn't sleep well for a long time and ended up in her swing for a couple months. Anyway, now she is a champ at sleeping in her crib and all I have to do is give her a pacifier and her favorite doll and she rolls off to sleep.

          I know it is frustrating now, but give it a little more time and you will get your little guy transitioned. Do what is best for you.

          Jennifer
          Needs

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Chrisada
            I have heard from friend's that their kids pretty much transitioned themselves when they were older. I just got done spending about an hour nursing a cranky baby to sleep! Now, that is one thing that I am tired of doing.
            The idea of having my toddler help pick out his bed and sheets and then happily embrace his new "big boy" lifestyle is a very appealing one to me, and I think a feasible one. But I'll probably still give the crib the ol' college try.

            Poor Eddy only went down a few minutes ago; I started trying to get him down two hours ago. Sigh. He's teething, and has a cold; he also has been off his schedule the last two nights. I'm pretty sure he'll go down more easily tomorrow. I hope your little one does too!
            Alison

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            • #7
              That is what we did for the toddler bed. It worked! (We were using the crib beforehand as well).

              One thought on reading your post, if it is taking an hour to get him to sleep, I wonder if he is over-tired. That doesn't always make sense, but I have found that my kids have a harder time falling asleep if they are too tired.

              I'm finally getting the baby to sleep by herself (not touching me the entire time!) and it is soooo nice. I've been putting her down almost asleep. Since she can roll over now and hates being on her back, I put her on her stomach. I am NOT recommending this or saying it is ok, just saying that this is the solution I have come up with, accepting the risks that come with it. She doesn't cry, maybe a little fussing, and nods off.

              I agree with the above about nursing before bed. I did that with my other two.

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              • #8
                As I look back now that we're done with kids I'm pretty happy with what we did. That said...there are always places where I could have done better.

                The best laid plans can always go....somewhere you didn't expect. Kudos to you for trying to transistion DS to a crib if for no other reason because your DH really thinks it's important! We've seen so many couples BATTLE over this issue. If you're on the same page whatever you decide is your deal....if you disagree that's when things get complicated. DH and I talked at length about our "ideas" about things before DD was born so thankfully we were on the same page unlike two couples we were close to. It really put a wrench in their marriage. To this day there is BITTERNESS between them as a couple when their 6 year old comes in their room and wakes them up four times a week.

                We had both our kids in the crib from day one -- that was our choice, I'm not saying it's the right choice for everyone. DS (baby #2) was a surprise so DD was transistioned to a big girl bed at 22 months. It worked out fantastically --- really NO issues with bedtime and limited issues with nap time. We lucked out big time. DS was in a big boy bed at 26 months -- he was climbing out of his crib by then so it was unsafe. I was ready to leave him in his crib for longer -- but you know how the "best laid plans" go.

                I think knowing your goal and working towards it is fantastic. Some people are so luke warm about "what they want for Jr." They have mixed feelings about transitioning to a crib (or whatever) and I think babies pick up on that.

                I have no helpful hints as I've not been in your shoes so I will just throw out the -- and kudos for respecting your spouse's ideas of where DS should sleep.
                Flynn

                Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

                “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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                • #9
                  Just my $0.02, but when we transitioned our kids into their own cribs we had a hell of a time until we got them a noise machine that blocks out other sounds. They kept waking up to EVERY little thing, so it worked for them. Granted, we did this when they were still really tiny, but the noise machine helped tremendously.

                  Good luck. It does get better, I promise. :therethere:

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by diggitydot
                    Just my $0.02, but when we transitioned our kids into their own cribs we had a hell of a time until we got them a noise machine that blocks out other sounds. They kept waking up to EVERY little thing, so it worked for them. Granted, we did this when they were still really tiny, but the noise machine helped tremendously.

                    Good luck. It does get better, I promise. :therethere:
                    We're big fans of background music, noice, etc.
                    Good point!!!
                    Flynn

                    Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

                    “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Totally forgot about the white noise dealie I bought at Bed Bath and Beyond. Very helpful, especially if you are in close quarters.

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