I have spawned Satan

[GrayMatterWife]

OK, so DS's latest thing, after I hug him and tell him that I love him, is to respond, "I don't love you, Mom." I know, I know--he doesn't really appreciate what he's saying and he's not trying to hurt me and he does it just to see what I'll do (so I just try to ignore it)...but still...OUCH.

I told DH about it. So the next day, when DH got home, I hugged DS and said that I loved him, as DH watched. Of course, DS immediately responded, "I love you, too, Mommy, so much!" and threw his arms around me in a big hug. DH looked at me, rolled his eyes, and walked off.

GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I totally got played.

[v-girl]

Oh my gosh! What a stinker!!! I think I would cry if one of my kids said that to me.

[mommax3]

I remember having to tell my youngest a couple years ago that it is customary to say "I love you" back when someone says it to you. "But why?" "Because it is hurtful to the person who says it first if you don't say it back, at least some of the time." "Well, I just don't really think about loving you, Mom, that is why I don't say it." Nice.

This is from my very logical son who is the most like his Dad of all of my boys and I have really had to work with him to develop empathy for others.....never an issue with the other two.

He still wipes off every single kiss I give him.

Sally

[GrayMatterWife]

He still wipes off every single kiss I give him.

Oh, he's not wiping it off...he's rubbing it in, so he can absorb as much of it as possible.

At least, that's what I tell myself when my little pischer uses the back of his hand to remove my love...

My DS is 2 1/2 and he sometimes says, "I don't like you" when he's frustrated. I tell him that hurts mommy's feelings and that he needs to say sorry. He seems remorseful.

Do you think it would be more helpful to be direct with him and tell him it hurts your feelings instead of ignoring it?

[GrayMatterWife]

My DS is 2 1/2 and he sometimes says, "I don't like you" when he's frustrated. I tell him that hurts mommy's feelings and that he needs to say sorry. He seems remorseful.

Do you think it would be more helpful to be direct with him and tell him it hurts your feelings instead of ignoring it?

Well, if he told me he didn't like me when he's not getting his way, I can't say that I blame him. Frankly, I don't "like" DS very much when he's being willful and I'm not getting MY way!

The first couple of times the "I don't love you, Mommy" thing happened, I stopped and got right down at his eye level and told him that it really hurt my feelings and made me sad. He didn't get it. He thought I needed medicine and brought me the jar of gummy bear vitamins.

[planet]

I have given mine things to say that they think break my heart. They feel like they have weapons to use against me when angry and I fake it. :> The end-all insult is that they won't play with me anymore. I feign angst as one marches away, but really...thanks for the peace!

I think I heard I hate X once and said that it was a word we save for very extreme things. Now I am not even allowed to say it. I can't help but smirk that your ds already knows how to get you. He really is a stinker. :P Ds2 has a few tricks up his sleeve and we have been known to refer to him as satan's spawn as well btw. Usually he's just the menace though (and an expensive one).

The tickle approach sounds good. Who needs therapy over tickling?!

[GrayMatterWife]

I know my children will require years of therapy. But really, who doesn't?

We don't need to pay for therapy, we can just start a new website, "Support Group for the Children of iMSN members"

Yeah, household in which the phrase, "Please don't play in Daddy's shoes. That may be brain matter" is not uncommon, will probably have several members who eventually need therapy.

[peggyfromwastate]

DD (the 11) has often said stuff like that, for forever. When I feel particularly snotty, I go on about how we don't love each other all the time, but we have to like each other, blah blah blah. A big philosophical lecture always gets her to leave me alone.

Anyway, Abigail, you know he doesn't mean it he just wants shock value and how ADORABLE that he brought you the vitamins!

They do like to test us, don't they...

[rainbabies]

my kids stay far away from daddys shoes...shouting, "there are cooties in those shoes...those are the cootie shoes..dont touch!!!"

i havent been told yet that im not loved. just an occasional "im mad at you mommy"

dd tells me all the time im her best friend.

[peggyfromwastate]

DD (the 11) has often said stuff like that, for forever. When I feel particularly snotty, I go on about how we don't love each other all the time, but we have to like each other, blah blah blah.

Uh, yeah, what I mean is that we don't always LIKE each other, but we always deep down LOVE each other... UGH. I was out the door to pick up kids from school....

Anyway, it reminds me of that really famous movie ---- what is it??? Can't remember. But the main character dies in it, and her kids have lots of anger issues... Before she dies, on her deathbed, she brings her oldest son in (he had the most issues) and tells him that she knows that he loves her. He is looking at her with hate and all that. So in all seriousness, this movie which I can't remember (it's pretty old) touched me before I even had kids and made me think about this issue. Because, not to be morbid, but we just never know when we will step outside our house and a piano will drop on our head. (I heard this in psych class??)

So I do try to reassure my kids that even though they get caught up in the energy of the moment, I know that they love me and daddy knows they love him, etc.

Can anyone remember the name of the movie??? I want to say it has sally fields in it, and there was a so-so sequel of it where the grandma was raising the kids...

[Auspicious]

DD (the 11) has often said stuff like that, for forever. When I feel particularly snotty, I go on about how we don't love each other all the time, but we have to like each other, blah blah blah.

Uh, yeah, what I mean is that we don't always LIKE each other, but we always deep down LOVE each other... UGH. I was out the door to pick up kids from school....

Anyway, it reminds me of that really famous movie ---- what is it??? Can't remember. But the main character dies in it, and her kids have lots of anger issues... Before she dies, on her deathbed, she brings her oldest son in (he had the most issues) and tells him that she knows that he loves her. He is looking at her with hate and all that. So in all seriousness, this movie which I can't remember (it's pretty old) touched me before I even had kids and made me think about this issue. Because, not to be morbid, but we just never know when we will step outside our house and a piano will drop on our head. (I heard this in psych class??)

So I do try to reassure my kids that even though they get caught up in the energy of the moment, I know that they love me and daddy knows they love him, etc.

Can anyone remember the name of the movie??? I want to say it has sally fields in it, and there was a so-so sequel of it where the grandma was raising the kids...

Terms of Endearment. She tells the seething kid that she knows he loves her, even if he pretends he doesn't, so if he feels guilty about acting mad after she's dead, he shouldn't, because no matter how mad he acts, she knows. That's a great scene--she screws tons of stuff up in that movie, but then that's a stroke of parenting genius.