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It's going to be ok, right? Right???

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  • It's going to be ok, right? Right???

    DH and I just bought plane tickets and made hotel reservations for our first "vacation" without DS. (I say "vacation," because DH is actually going to a conference and I'm just tagging along because it's in Florida in October and the hospital pays for the fancy-schmancy *spa* hotel.) DH and I desperately need this time away, especially with the new baby coming in a few months.

    ANYWAY, I'm excited but nervous. The longest I've ever been away from DS is a few HOURS, the thought of leaving him for 5 days is making me break out into a cold sweat. We're leaving him with my parents so I think he'll be ok, especially since we'll have just returned from a week-long vacation with my parents so he'll be used to being around them. I have visions of him feeling abandoned and angry and punishing me by withholding love and affection when we return.

    But ... it's going to be ok, right?
    ~Jane

    -Wife of urology attending.
    -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

  • #2
    He will be thrilled to see you when you get back! ...and he'll love the grandparent love heaped on him. Go have fun...

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    • #3
      He'll do great! And you will be an even better mommy by taking some "you" time and relaxing a bit- don't feel guilty at all!

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Ladybug
        He'll have a fabulous time with his grandparents. Lucy loved the one-on-one time that she had with her grandparents when we were in Chicago. The dynamic is totally different than when mom and dad are around. Lots of attentions, fun adventures and special memories. So go have fun! I always start missing my children after about 48 hours, and it's refreshing to get home and be sooooooo excited to see them. With two kids it's been very difficult for DH and I to spend much time alone. It's a whole new ballgame, so enjoy your vacation together.
        spot on!

        go. enjoy yourself. i totally understand your anxiety (I get that way even when I leave the kids with dh!), but you'll be so glad for the break, and so refreshed. he'll just be thrilled to see you.

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        • #5
          OMG-

          If its anything like the visits with the grandparents in this house it's kind of like, "oh. it's you. you're back. um, yay?"

          ENJOY. Everyone will be better for it.

          Jenn

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Genivieve
            Originally posted by Ladybug
            He'll have a fabulous time with his grandparents. Lucy loved the one-on-one time that she had with her grandparents when we were in Chicago. The dynamic is totally different than when mom and dad are around. Lots of attentions, fun adventures and special memories. So go have fun! I always start missing my children after about 48 hours, and it's refreshing to get home and be sooooooo excited to see them. With two kids it's been very difficult for DH and I to spend much time alone. It's a whole new ballgame, so enjoy your vacation together.
            spot on!

            go. enjoy yourself. i totally understand your anxiety (I get that way even when I leave the kids with dh!), but you'll be so glad for the break, and so refreshed. he'll just be thrilled to see you.
            Yep. You'll thank yourself in the long run and you'll be a better mommy when you return.
            Flynn

            Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

            “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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            • #7
              The only problem I have with my kids after leaving with the grandparents for an extended period of time is that they begin to expect nightly massages, daily trips to Chuck-e-Cheese, and their every whim catered to. Believe me when I say that he'll have a better time than you will.

              GO!!!

              Kelly
              In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

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              • #8
                You are going to have a great time and so will he! And your parents. It is a little nerve-wracking but worth it and so good for everyone. You'll do great!

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                • #9
                  Jane....go, go, GO!!!! This trip will be good not only for you and hubby, but for DS as well. He will love spending time with his grandparents. And just think, you'll be able to eat dinner ANYTIME you want!!!


                  Originally posted by house elf
                  The only problem I have with my kids after leaving with the grandparents for an extended period of time is that they begin to expect nightly massages, daily trips to Chuck-e-Cheese, and their every whim catered to. Believe me when I say that he'll have a better time than you will.

                  GO!!!

                  Kelly
                  For nearly a month after we returned home, DS insisted that I massage his arms and legs until he fell asleep.

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                  • #10
                    Have a great time.

                    No MOMMY Guilt allowed!

                    He will do fine, truly.
                    Peggy

                    Aloha from paradise! And the other side of training!

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                    • #11
                      Yes. Everything is going to be completely fine. Be sure to leave a copy of your health insurance card and a power of medical consent form for the grandparents--just in case. This should give you a feeling of REASSURANCE, not panic. Everything will go great.

                      Originally posted by migirl
                      The longest I've ever been away from DS is a few HOURS, the thought of leaving him for 5 days is making me break out into a cold sweat.
                      Is HE sweating? No, he's not, is he? He's probably nervous but excited. Just like you. So stop wasting your pore-juice.

                      Originally posted by migirl
                      I have visions of him feeling abandoned and angry and punishing me by withholding love and affection when we return.
                      He won't think of it that way at all. You're projecting onto him the ability to rationalize/reason the way an adult might. Kids don't think that way. He'll definitely miss you, but you being away for a short time (especially when it is made clear that you will return) will not cause him to doubt your love. He is 100% certain of your love for him.

                      My son went to spend a week with his grandparents last May. He had a blast. On the drive down to Texas, he told my MIL, "My mommy loves me and misses me every day"--because that was the last thing I'd said to him.

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                      • #12
                        Thanks, everyone. I really, really, really needed to hear this. I know it will be so good for ALL of us, I'm just nervous since this will be my first time away from DS.

                        THANK YOU, Abigail, for the advice on health insurance card and medical consent form for my parents. I never would have thought of that. And thanks for the tough love on the conservation of my pore juice, I'll keep it for something more sweat-worthy.
                        ~Jane

                        -Wife of urology attending.
                        -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

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                        • #13
                          Leaving a detailed note, probably over-detailed, along with the insurance card and authorization always makes me feel better.

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