Finding out the gender before the baby is born

[Michele]

It seems as if no one waits for the birth to find out if it's a boy or a girl. Is it a lot easier to know with planning and stuff? Is it that we're just too impatient to wait? Is it that you don't really get the option since it's all there on the ultrasound screen?

Just curious!

Michele

[SueC]

The first time we kept it a surprise and that was really fun although near the end I the curiousity nearly killed me. The second time around we found out just for practicality. Our girls were only 20 months apart and I wanted to be able to sort through the baby clothes before the baby came.

For my hubby and I it is alot of things. I feel like I can bond more when I know it is a girl or boy, like I get to know them. Also, for us it is hard to agree on the names so then we have a chance to focus on just one sex. This time with the third one it is fun to know too so that I can go through all of my old girl clothes that I stored and cannot wait to reuse! That's just us though. I have an old college roommate that never finds out and is surprised each time.

Jessica

[PrincessFiona]

knowing the sex...

With our first, we wanted to know just to be able to shop, etc....and he kept his legs crossed at every ultrasound...that little stinker! I was miserable by the end not knowing just because I had wanted to know so badly I knew with #2 and #3 and ...I did feel a certain amount of letdown because I knew in advance...but it was awesome to be able to shop, etc.

This time around, I really, really want to know...I guess I want to be able to shop for the baby, imagine how things will be with the baby, etc.....


kris

We found out with two of ours and were surprised with two. We didn't find out with the first one. The next two we did. I wanted it to be a surprise but my hubby wanted to know because he had so many unknowns in our life at the time. Which medical school, would we be moving etc. The last time we wanted to be surprised because, honestly, I was a little nervous I would be disappointed if it was a boy after having three. I knew I would be happy no matter what when the baby was delivered and I held him in my arms. I had a friend who bawled when she found out she was having another boy. I didn't want to do that. It worked for me. I was so thrilled to have little Dallin! If I ever had another one (which I won't by the way!!! :!: ) I would want it to be a surprise.

Robin

[peggyfromwastate]

I've wanted to know for all 3 of my babies. For my first, to know the sex for planning. For the twins, to try to divine if they were frat or identical. I looked forward to the determining ultrasounds so much that I felt like it was looking forward to a surprise at the hospital! I have some friends who have waited to find out, only to hear endless questions along the line of "What do you want it to be?" And then, "I bet your husband wants a little boy." And, ridiculously, "Will he be angry if it turns out to be a girl?" Anyway, we will definitely find out ahead of time. I think for our older kids it will be easier to get them used to the idea of a baby brother or a baby sister, so that they won't be disappointed if they are hoping for one, and they get the other...

What are you going to do????

[Rapunzel]

I've wanted to know the gender of each of my children in utero for one reason alone: to name the little bugger kicking me from the inside out! I mean, it doesn't seem as forceful to shout, "Hey, you! Stop kicking me" As opposed to, "Zoe Aileen and Madeline Rose, if you don't stop kicking my ribs I'm going to be really upset!" See, the first and middle names give it so much more authenticity. I know, I'm a dork.

[mommax3]

We didn't find out with our first, but when you have a husband who does many, many ultrasounds in the course of his work (as mine did by the time we were pregnant with our second) what are you going to do? I know we are weird, but with the second and third babies, we would get a babysitter, go do an ultrasound, and then go out for dinner.

Also, when I found out my second one was a boy, I did cry and I was glad that I was able to get over that little bit of disappointment before he was actually born. So for that reason, we found out with our third as well -- also a boy, BTW. But I didn't get upset that time -- I guess I was resigned to it. I just felt like every baby deserved a welcome untempered by even a little disappointment, and knowing myself too well, I wanted to find out I wasn't having a girl before the delivery.

(And if I HAD been having a girl, I would have needed major shopping time, as would the grandmothers! )

Sally

We didn't find out but I had a good feeling the baby was a girl.
DH was doing his ob/gyn rotation at the time and on a slow night we used one of the ultrasound machines at the hospital for 30 minutes. It was so fun to see her moving around and hanging out without any time pressure! Anyway, he thought he saw enough to tell it was a girl but he didn't tell me until after she was born.
Next time around (assuming, trying with no luck) I think we will find out just for the sake of planning, clothing, etc.
I do think it was nice to have the surprise of finding out to keep me going through labor.

[Michele]

It's good to hear all the replies. Russ and I aren't expecting for at least another 2 years. I always thought it would be great to be surprised, but hearing all the arguments for knowing, we might change our mind. And I guess if Russ does go into OBGYN I won't have much of an option of not knowing!

Michele

I think in our case we found out on the second baby to give everyone a heads up on the "needs" of this baby. If it had been a girl we would have needed everything, since it was a boy we have been able to use clothes that aren't to stained (gotta love spitters!).

The first child, we weren't sure if we wanted to know. Then when we went for the first ultrasound, DW was still in med school, the OB asks if we wanted to know the sex and I could tell on DW face that she had seen "the turtle sign". As I was the only one in the room who felt like they were staring at a moving Roschach test, I demanded that I be let in on the sex. THere was no way that I was going wait for nine months in the dark while my wife knew what we were having the whole time!

[houseelf]

Great thread!

My hubby and I found out the sex because we wanted to feel like we planned something!

In all seriousness, however, I will probably always find out because I'm an "eat dessert first" type of girl. I think that it would be incredibly special to wait to the big day and I admire those who choose not to find out. I guess to each his own!

Kelly

[Rapunzel]

I am just like Kelly. I cannot wait for surprises. I have a really hard time waiting until Christmas to open presents for instance. That is probably the REAL reason I feel compelled to know the kids' genders before they are born.