Stay-At-Home and Work-At-Home Parents....

[PrincessFiona]

What do you do all day?

I'm just curious about how we spend our days...and perhaps I'm feeling a bit of summer guilt?

For the most part this summer, the kids get up and have breakfast and then watch HBO Family while I clean up the house a bit, check my email, etc...then we go for a picnic lunch at the park/or eat lunch here...and they either 1. play outside and ride bikes 2. Play in the back in the pool while I sit out with them or 3. We go to the public pool and they play while I sit and read/watch.

I'm feeling guilty..no homework yet, extra stimulation, etc......


kris

[mommax3]

Kris,

You are not alone in your struggle of what to do with your kids, trust me. Here is our summer schedule, such as it is.

M-W-F

We all generally get up around 7 and I just throw on clothes to go to the gym. Everyone gets dressed and we have breakfast. I put some fruit, crackers, and bottled water in a bag for my oldest to take to his theatre camp. We all get in the car by 8:45 (on a good day! ) to take Luke downtown to the theatre, and after we drop him off, we head to the gym. The younger two boys go to childcare and I exercise for a little over an hour. We used to go home then, but since I have to pick Luke up at noon, it is hard to find a way to fill that time, so today we went to our neighborhood pool for about 45 minutes, and then we went back downtown to get Luke by noon. Back home again for PBJs, baby carrots, and milk, and then naptime for Nathan. I grabbed a shower after my delectable Lean Cuisine lunch, while the boys were still eating. I put Nathan to bed and told Luke he needed to spend some time reading, and got Joel interested in some bubbles outside. I dried my hair and put on makeup, and broke up a fight between the two of them. I put Luke in time-out and played bubbles with Joel for a while. When Luke got out of time-out, I told him he could play Nintendo for 45 minutes (his daily limit) and I set Joel up to play Jump-Start Kindergarten on the computer. I sat with him for a while and then I cleaned up the lunch mess, loaded the dishwasher, started some laundry, and got the mail. I sat down to read a People magazine that came in the mail. Nathan woke up, so I changed his diaper and took him outside to play with bubbles. Joel finished playing computer and came out too. I realized Luke's time was about up, so I gave him a 10 minute warning and realized I had put wet clothes in the dryer, but hadn't turned it on, so I turned it on at that point. Nathan and Joel got done playing with bubbles and I poured a couple of buckets of water on the front step to rinse off the bubble residue. Joel wanted to play an Elmo game on Nintendo, so I set him up and made Luke do some piano stuff with me. Nathan tagged along with us. Luke got done playing piano so I gave he and Nathan popsicles and told them to go in the backyard and eat them. Joel is about to finish playing Nintendo, and I am about to put in a video or a DVD!!!!! This is a typical day for us three times a week.

T-Th

We get up at the same time, but while we are eating breakfast, I am also fixing three lunches as well as Luke's snack. We drop off Luke at 9, and then I take the younger two to their preschool for a summer mom's day out program that runs until 3!!!!! They both love it. There is a school age component to it that Luke attends in the afternoons, so I take his lunch over there to keep it refrigerated. I exercise one of these days and take the other day off. I still have to pick Luke up at noon and transfer him to the other program, but the rest of the day is mine. Last week I had lunch with my husband both days, but we usually just shoot for one or the other. I am going to start stripping some wallpaper and painting in my dining room on these days without the kids. When I pick the kids up at 3, they are tired out and we usually watch a video when we get home and maybe make some microwave popcorn or something.


Nothing too exciting! I need to get to the library with the two older ones, but I haven't made it a priority so far. They both have reading assignments (and Luke is supposed to do a book report as well) from their teachers and I don't want to wait until the last minute.

Luke performs his musical the first weekend in August. His grandparents are coming to see him in it, and then are taking all of the boys home with them for a few days. Travis and I are going to spend the first part of the week in Dallas alone and then will head up to KS for some time with his parents and brothers -- everyone has planned to spend the second weekend in August with them. We will be in KS until August 13, and then we will only have a couple of weeks until school starts. Sooooo, I really only have to make it through the next month.

Sally

[SueC]

I don't know if I count in this category, but here's my day.
7am kids wake up--dress them and feed them breakfast.
8am leave for Jazzercise, we're there until about 9:45am
when we get back it depends on the day.
Monday morning--pack a lunch and go to playgroup at a park with wading pool.
Tuesday morning--go to American Royal (they have a kid agricultural program)
Friday morning--take them to mother's day out!!! They are there until 3pm.
Any other morning--hang around the house, maybe go to the park or something, sometimes go to Wonderscope (kid's interactive place with art, balls, nature things, etc.)
They eat around noon and hopefully nap from 1-3--they didn't today so I'm about to wring their little necks. While they are napping I try to get as much work done as possible. My work generally spills over into the afternoon when they wake up and hopefully entertain themselves for awhile.
After nap--if it's Tuesday our babysitter is here until 7pm so I can work.
Any other day, put a video in, take them outside to play, let them play by themselves in the playroom, or go run errands.
That's it! Nothing too exciting here except for the few structured activities we do have. Don't feel guilty Kris--your schedule sounds like what summer is all about. If it is too structured, they might as well be in school!

[Rapunzel]

Here's my rough schedule (ie this is the ideal - things usually meander off the path and various emergencies can and do pop up):

6am - I wake up and work out (although I've been seriously falling down in this area - I think I'm going to join a gym and just go there at 6 in the am) IF Jon is home (ie not on call and if he isn't leaving for work until 7am)

7am - I shower, spray down the tub with shower-to-shower, put in contacts, do my morning beauty ritual, wipe down sink with Clorox wipes and go to the bedroom to get dressed and put on a bit of makeup

7:45am - throw a load of laundry in the washer, take my vitamin, eat, look at the calendar, unload the dishwasher

8am - wake the kids, have them get dressed (I change the baby's diaper and dress her), feed the kids, brush all the girls' hair, wipe down the kitchen

9am - I take a break (hey! I've been going since 6am!) and let the kids watch a little tv or play in their rooms (their choice)

10am - run errands, do various tasks around the house (currently remodeling the kitchen so I have spent quite a bit of time painting) while the kids hang out for the summer with their 13year old uncle/built-in babysitter who is visiting for another few weeks. Also have done/usually do in the morning: change poopy diapers, take a pregnant friend on an emergency trip to the hospital, go to playgroup once a week, clean up cluttered areas in the house (paperwork pile-ups, etc), take care of technical details (like ironing out our dental coverage), read to the kids, supervise drawing with markers (always dangerous!), go for a walk with the kids, sign up my older daughters for ballet lessons, track down a basketball league for my son, take laundry out of the washer and put into dryer and a few other tasks I'm probably forgetting...

12pm - lunch!

12:30pm - clean up lunch! Change baby's diaper and put her down for nap! If other kids are grumpy/tired then put them down for naps, too! When I'm ill or haven't gotten enough sleep it is Mommy's naptime as well!

12:30pm - 5pm (roughly) - generally do any of the following: take clothes out of dryer, fold, and put away; read over my lesson for Sunday, spend a bit of time on the computer either catching up on news, doing electronic "errands" or on a handful of sites such as this one; clean up any disasters that have formed or are forming; go thru the mail (when it arrives) sort it and spend a bit of time reading if I receive one of my magazines or catalogs; go to the grocery store w/kids; go to the post office w/kids; go to the library w/kids; if it is hot outside turn on the lawn sprinklers and let the kids run through them like maniacs (poor people's version of a pool ); there are probably a few things I'm missing here but you get the drift....

5pm - start thinking about dinner, kids play inside or read or on crazy days they get to watch a little bit more tv or play videogames for a bit

6:30pm - EAT (I'm just about to eat - dinner is on the stove!)

7pm - put dirty dishes in dishwasher, run dishwasher, wipe down table, wipe down kitchen counters/sink, put any leftovers away, have kids pick up toys and put them away, have kids pick out clothes for next day and lay them out, feed the cats and change their litter, take out the trash to the garage, sweep the new kitchen floor, turn off lights in the kitchen (it's officially closed for the night!) and the living/dining rooms, turn on night lights, bathe the kids (every other night)

8pm - read to the kids (they each pick a book so the length of time we read depends on the lengths of the four books my kids pick), brush kids teeth, say family prayer, kiss all children and possibly sing them their favorite lullaby individually (they LOVE that)

9pm - spend time with my husband and/or to myself

go to bed at 10pm when I'm smart and after 10:30 when I'm stupid

So, that's the "Summer" schedule which will change in late August to include two to three hours of devoted learning time during the optional play/tv time in the morning and afternoon. Something that I have had a hard time fitting into my schedule that we need to start doing is Family Home Evening which we are supposed to have on Monday nights. I think what we might do is have it after the kids are ready for bed once a week and just put them to bed later than usual that one night. We'll see....


Jennifer

[PrincessFiona]

Wow

I really am a loser...

Here is my schedule:

6am get up to go walking

7 am come home and have a cup of coffee, snuggle up on the sofa and watch Fox News until I doze off (usually ony takes 15 minutes)

8.30-9.00 Wake up kids. My son has become a self-professed "later-tater".

9-10 Breakfast and kitchen clean-up....and a cup of tea in there for me!

10-12..I have no idea what we do 8O We hang out, the kids watch HBO Family or a good kids show. I tend to check out the 'puter, do some writing or read. But I'll confess to spending time online a lot more that I wish that I did.

12-1 lunch

1-5...could be the park, pool or hangin' out at the house. If we're hanging out at home, I probably clean up the house a bit, play online, go through the mail and talk on the phone 8O

5-6...consider what I should have defrosted and didn't...and what I can actually now make for dinner

6-7...eat said meal and pray it isn't a fiasco.

7-8.30...kids can watch a movie or read.

8.30-9...teeth get brushed and kids get to bed. This is all theoretical of course, because the kids tend to get up and down quite a bit much to the dismay of their helpless, overwhelmed parents who tend to give in way too much!

10-12 or later 8O Thomas and I watch a movie (Netflix) or HBO and spend time together...

Now you see why I need a nap in the mornings....


OK..new promises to myself...less time online, more quality time...

kris

[mommax3]

Kris,

NO, you are not a loser. It sounds like your schedule is working for your family. I wish that a) my husband left for work a little later (he is usually gone by 6:30 at the latest.....and that will probably never change) and b) my kids would sleep in -- we have a rule that they can't come out of their rooms until the first number on their clocks says 7 -- they are awake earlier than that.

I realized that I forgot to "finish" my day --- sometime between 4:30 and 5:30 Travis and I talk and I find out when (if) he is coming home, and make dinner plans accordingly. Right now I am doing Weight Watchers and am eating frozen entrees, and he usually does too. I try to have ingredients for at least three things the kids will eat on hand all the time (this DOES include macaroni & cheese, hot dogs, and frozen pizza -- hopefully not all in the same week -- but hey, this is call week for us, so anything goes) so that I can figure something out for dinner at that point without freaking out. After dinner (which is usually somewhere in the 6:00 hour) we may take a walk, go to the pool, play piano, play a game, play outside, or read stories. If it is bath night, (two youngest only; Luke takes showers every morning now) we start that between 7 and 7:30 and they go to bed by 8:00 after stories and prayers. Luke goes to bed between 8 and 9 depending on his behavior and how tired he is. At that point, Travis and I (or just me, depending on how the night shapes up) fold clothes, talk, channel surf (him) and play on the computer (me) and also use the time to make phone calls to our parents, siblings, and friends. We head to bed around 10, watch the news, and then catch a re-run of Everybody Loves Raymond at 10:30 if we don't get caught up in something more "interesting".

I think your days sound just fine --- don't let these posts make you feel guilty. I love hearing how you, Jennifer and Sue spend your days. I don't think anyone has ever asked me before what I do all day and really cared about the answer so thanks!

Sally

[SueC]

I guess I never finished my day either!
And by the way Kris--you are not a loser! Your day sounds just fine to me!
After kids wake up from naps, I turn on a cartoon or let them play in the playroom, if I don't have to load them up in the car and take them to the post office to get some work stuff in the mail. Sometimes it occurs to me around now that we need to eat dinner so I figure that out, or wait till my husband gets home and let him figure it out! Lately, he has been cooking some, or we'll go get fast food. If I'm feeling especially domestic I will let the girls help me bake brownies or something, and also sometimes I do a cutting and glueing project with them (not nearly as often as I should, though).
I try really hard to get the girls fed, bathed and in their jammies by 7pm and we go on a 3.5 mile walk with anywhere between 1 and 3 other moms in our double jogger strollers. If we don't go walking, then sometimes me and my husband sit out on the porch and watch the girls play in the front yard. Around 8:30 or so, I put the kids in bed and it is back to the computer for me for more work. As you can see, nowhere in my schedule does housework happen--I pick up as I go and the house stays fairly neat but the deep cleaning doesn't happen nearly enough. Luckily my husband has very low expectations of me!

Kris,

You're day sounds an alot like mine. We almost do the same things at the same hours which is quite funny. You're pregnant as am I and I think we just require a little bit more "hanging out" time. I am 23 weeks along now. Dont know about you but I feel like I have a watermelon under my shirt. I had forgotten how long summer pregnancies can be. We just play our days by ear sometimes especially since there really isnt much to do where we live.

[PrincessFiona]

preggers

Hey Maria...we're at about the same point in our pregnancies...I'll be 23 weeks tomorrow. I think being pregnant does play a role in how tired and...lazy I've become...really! I've started showing (as noticed by a friend I had coffee with "Kris, you finally look pregnant" on Satruday) and feel heavy and clunky. I notice when I walk in the morning that I'm easily out of breath and can't walk as fast. I feel energized and then by the time the coffee is done brewing...I'm ready to go back to bed.

It's a good thing my children don't get up at 7am like Sallys! 8O Of course, if they did, maybe they would go to bed when they are supposed to Maybe I should start waking them up at 7

I feel a bit guilty that we aren't signed up for a lot of activities and running around, but I'm so glad that we aren't...I am kind of enjoying the 'lazy days' of summer routine around here.

kris

[mommax3]

I am all for the lazy days of summer, too -- but my kids are very active, especially the oldest one, and since it is too hot here (after about 10 a.m.) to spend any time outside, I signed up for a bunch of stuff for them to do. If I lived in a more temperate climate, I would force the kids outside and tell them to make their own fun -- which they are pretty good at doing in the spring and fall. It is just miserable here in the summer unless you are at a pool, and since my kids and I are blue-eyed fair-skinned blondes, that isn't a good solution for us.

I can't wait to move away from here!


Sally

Wow, you all have a good idea of your schedules. After reading this I realized, I know we have routines....but what are they? (I blame pregnancy hormones).
Our summer would really be split by each month. Bryn did swim lessons 3 days a week in June with the other two days at the preschool "summer camp" program. We went to swim lessons at 10:30 then stayed at the pool and had lunch 'til 1:30 or so. Hopefully she was tuckered out enough to take a nap. In August, I will start a few of my contracts and be working more so she will be at my mom's Tues morning and at preschool W, Th, and Fri.

So, July:

5:30-6:00 8O 8O Bryn wakes up and is *ready* to go. The beautiful thing is that her dad gets up with her and I sleep until 7:00 or 7:30.

7:30 -- If I am going to the gym I don't shower, otherwise I shower and try to coax Bryn in with me. We have breakfast, I read her the comics, we pack lunches and do whatever is needed to get ready for the day. Bryn does a lot of coloring or drawing in the morning. She has a little desk by my desk so this is usually my computer time.

8:00 -- if it's tuesday, she goes to my mom's house until 12:30. This is my time to make appointments, run errands, etc.

9:00 -- On Mondays, we go to the gym and she takes a tumbling class through the childcare center while I work out. If I'm not too exhausted, we go to the pool afterwards (it is convenient that the gym has an outdoor pool).
Wednesday and Friday, I take her to preschool from 9:00 to 3:00. I use the time to work out, run errands, take care of misc household crap (bills, my internet connection, insurance, etc), work on any other projects I have going, clean all or part of the house (we split cleaning into dry, wet floor, wet kitchen bathroom cleaning and I try to do one or all of those).

Thursday -- our day to hang out. We do playdates, go to the zoo, go the the pool, whatever sounds fun.

early afternoon -- nap?? Yeah, right! If I'm lucky. If she is really tired and needs to rest, she likes to watch cooking shows on PBS with me. I'm not sure why she finds these so fascinating but I like them too and can't complain.

late afternoon -- meet friends or dad at the pool or go alone. Maybe meet friends at the zoo (we have a membership and live 5 min away). Go for a walk or bikeride if it isn't too blazing hot.

5ish -- start thinking about dinner. Usually not too bad because I plan meals out because it cuts down on grocery bills. If the meal needs more prep time, we start at 5:00 otherwise its later.

6:00 or so -- eat dinner

6:30 -- take a walk if it's not too hot. A frozen custard place just opened 4 blocks from us -- *exactly* what I need! If it's too hot, Bryn likes to do "exercises" on the floor. Usually she can recruit one of us and likes to tell us what to do!

7:00 -- jammies on, brush, teeth, read books.

7:30 or 7:45 -- BED!!

Looking at other posts and mine.....we really do bathe our child! She usually showers with me or takes a shower after being at the pool. Since we have been at the pool so often that covers her bathing needs. If not, she takes a bath before bed.

And the schedule after 7:45 --- I usually in bed and reading by 9:00. Sometimes even a little earlier. Pathetic!