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When's Daddy Coming Home?

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  • When's Daddy Coming Home?

    DrK hasn't been home before bedtime in three nights. He just called and said he'll be late again tonight. Last night, I went to a kinder round up meeting alone (hired a sitter). He doesn't even know that the baby learned how to sing or how to clap her hands to "If Your Happy and You Know It" or that she's cutting four teeth and has gone almost a week without eating anything solid. Today, I've done 5 pick up/drop offs (and yesterday and the day before), taken the baby to mommy & me, taken the oldest to occupational therapy, read half a dozen books to the middle child, and run at least 3 errands with kids in tow and I've made at least a half dozen phone calls trying to schedule the eldest's IEP not to mention the dozens of other calls I've made relative and chores I've done to general family/household maintenance. I made dinner though the kids won't eat it and I'm trying to muster up the momentum to get everyone bathed and into bed. You know the drill.

    Now my co-room mom who claims that she's "not a pinterest mom" wants me to make these for the teacher's "surprise unbirthday celebration": http://communitytable.com/355342/phi...llery_355342-4. She says that she's already put "eat me" labels on the sherbet cups and "drink me" labels on the juice boxes and purchased propeller hats for all of the children....This started out as an "oops, we missed the teacher's birthday" so we needed to ask the parents to have the kids make cards for the teacher. Now it's totally out of hand. I told her I can't. I just can't. The day of the party, I still have to do my usual shuffling of three kids to three different places and take the baby to the pediatrician. I suppose she can make them with cream cheese instead of peanut butter but I doubt that she can even bring them into the classroom if they are unwrapped and not on the "approved nut-safer snack list". I feel like a total jerk telling her to cool it but really? She a SAHM to one child and her husband can actually leave work in the middle of the day to attend "visit day" in our children's classroom. I just cannot compete.
    Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

  • #2
    Oh, and this morning, when I sorted eight loads of freshly washed and folded laundry into stacks on our floor for the kids to take to their rooms....and he unconsciously trampled through the stacks.. and I told him to "please not step on the clean clothes".... he said that I was "uptight." I AM *NOT* UPTIGHT!
    Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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    • #3
      That could lead to justifiable homicide with laundered leggings.
      -Ladybug

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      • #4
        Hugs. Minus one kid and not as much running, I'm there with you. Last week, the girls didn't see DH once. This week, it will only be once. Good for you for saying no.
        Jen
        Wife of a PGY-4 orthopod, momma to 2 DDs, caretaker of a retired race-dog, Hawkeye!


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        • #5
          I just made grilled cheese sandwiches for the kids and told them that "I'm not a short order cook" when the boys demanded cream cheese sandwiches instead.
          Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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          • #6
            Hugs! Just keep swimming!

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            • #7
              The hours as a new attending suck. Hugs!
              Student and Mom to an Oct 2013 boy
              Wife to Anesthesia Critical Care attending

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              • #8
                Boys are watching tv and the baby just got her second wind.
                Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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                • #9
                  Tara
                  Married 20 years to MD/PhD in year 3 of MFM fellowship. SAHM to five wonderful children (#6 due in August), a sweet GSD named Bella, a black lab named Toby, and 1 guinea pig.

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                  • #10
                    Didn't he lose a partner? Is there plans to hire a new one? I know how much it sucked when DH was down a partner - hang in there! BIG BIG hugs!
                    Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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                    • #11
                      He lost TWO. And there is no sign that they will be replaced.
                      Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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                      • #12
                        Oh no!!! Call in reinforcements? Do you have any household help? You could ask specifically for laundry-folding. My piles always get destroyed by little feet.

                        So sorry it's madness right now.
                        married to an anesthesia attending

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                        • #13
                          I'm good for laundry folding. I do it when it's coming out of the dryer. It's getting it back to the kids' rooms that requires temporarily making stacks on the floor for the kids to carry to their rooms. Stack of pants for each kid, stack of pjs, etc. Then they take the stacks and put them in their drawers. If everyone cooperates, it takes about 15 minutes.

                          I have weekly house cleaning and a semi-reliable babysitter (becoming less so as she nears high school graduation, has a boyfriend in college, got another part time job....).

                          It's just the constant absence that is rough. And when he's home, he's too fried to be helpful or sociable.
                          Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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                          • #14
                            Oh wow, I didn't realize that he lost two partners...Is the rest of the group negotiating to remedy this situation?
                            Tara
                            Married 20 years to MD/PhD in year 3 of MFM fellowship. SAHM to five wonderful children (#6 due in August), a sweet GSD named Bella, a black lab named Toby, and 1 guinea pig.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by MrsK View Post
                              It's just the constant absence that is rough. And when he's home, he's too fried to be helpful or sociable.
                              Ugh, this is so hard. Because of both:

                              "When's Daddy coming home?" "I have no idea."

                              AND

                              "When's Daddy coming home?" "He is home, actually. He's just off somewhere staring into space because he can't tolerate any more human interaction today."

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