School in the Fall.

[scarlett09]

We just had a Zoom virtual orientation yesterday for our oldest, who is due to start K in the fall. They outlined a typical day, pre-COVID. They have zero clue what September will look like, and similar to what MrsC said, the state will dictate what happens. I could help the oldest with online school, but no clue how to balance that with the youngest, who will be a toddler. Do I send the 1 yo to daycare more frequently? Can’t bring grandparents into the mix. I also left my job and need to find a new one, so do I go PT? So many unanswered questions.


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[MrsK]

Not to dog pile on Tulips because I’m sure that she put a lot of thought into homeschooling and it’s the best for her family, I agree that because of the points stated, homeschooling is not for everyone.

I probably could at least decently handle about 50-70% of homeschooling. I have really volatile kids and I have a low frustration tolerance. I know those things about myself. I am happy helping out in classrooms for limited periods. I love doing a lot of “field trips” and educational things with my kids but I wouldn’t want to handle 100% of their education.

K1 is really the only one of my kids that is happy to be distance learning and that is because he can avoid navigating social situations at school. He needs to go to school exactly so he can practice navigating those social situations. I’m very worried that not being able to go to school, or going and not being able to work on group projects and have other opportunities to interact with people outside of our family, will set him back and cause him to be even more unprepared for the social pressures of middle school.

The other two....they are miserable. Lambie is willful and knows all my weaknesses. She often refuses to do work. K2 is just not studious. He’s athletic and social and excels in leadership roles among his peers. Without that, he is like a powder keg and he has tremendous anxiety about being home.

I’m undecided about what I will do in the Fall. It really depends on what school looks like for my kids and how risky it is for them to participate. If it’s awful enough, I will not have a choice but to keep them home. But I truly hope it does not come to that.


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[MrsK]

We just had a Zoom virtual orientation yesterday for our oldest, who is due to start K in the fall. They outlined a typical day, pre-COVID. They have zero clue what September will look like, and similar to what MrsC said, the state will dictate what happens. I could help the oldest with online school, but no clue how to balance that with the youngest, who will be a toddler. Do I send the 1 yo to daycare more frequently? Can’t bring grandparents into the mix. I also left my job and need to find a new one, so do I go PT? So many unanswered questions.


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That’s tough. I was discussing it with Lambie’s kindergarten teacher who has become a friend to me over the last 5 years that my kids have been in her school. One option for kindergarten parents is to delay their start. It’s not ideal but keeping those kids out of the classroom would allow smaller class sizes and therefore greater distancing in the classroom. Knowing myself, I think it’s very likely I would go that route if I had a kindergartner starting in the Fall and the classroom environment would be much changed from what it is now.


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[OrionGrad]

The moms at our school suddenly seem like they’re ready to revolt. Someone started circulating those CDC recommendations on Facebook, and the whole thing picked up steam, and now there’s a Facebook group “against” our district adopting those guidelines. At this point our district hasn’t said anything either way, so the whole thing seems a dramatic to me.
I’m really hoping they find a way to do in-person school in the fall, but personally I don’t have a problem with my kids wearing masks or cancelling field trips or anything. I guess that means I’m in the minority around here. 🤷🏼*♀️


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[MrsK]

The moms at our school suddenly seem like they’re ready to revolt. Someone started circulating those CDC recommendations on Facebook, and the whole thing picked up steam, and now there’s a Facebook group “against” our district adopting those guidelines. At this point our district hasn’t said anything either way, so the whole thing seems a dramatic to me.
I’m really hoping they find a way to do in-person school in the fall, but personally I don’t have a problem with my kids wearing masks or cancelling field trips or anything. I guess that means I’m in the minority around here. 🤷🏼*♀️


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The CDC guidelines are frightening and I’m having a hard time accepting that school may look like they suggest in the Fall. IDK if it will though. The landscape is constantly shifting and it’s too soon to know anything. We could have something that is less intimidating and for a shorter duration than the present CDC recommendations or we could have something that is worse and goes on indefinitely. I’m trying my hardest to just push those thoughts out of my mind.


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[spotty_dog]

The CDC guidelines are frightening and I’m having a hard time accepting that school may look like they suggest in the Fall. IDK if it will though. The landscape is constantly shifting and it’s too soon to know anything. We could have something that is less intimidating and for a shorter duration than the present CDC recommendations or we could have something that is worse and goes on indefinitely. I’m trying my hardest to just push those thoughts out of my mind.

I don't find this scary per se. It's a bit...sobering to confront the reality, that school simply cannot look the same in the fall as it has in the past. Some changes have to be made. But a lot can change between now and August, and I'm trying to hang in there.

Schools-Decision-Tree.jpg

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

School in the Fall.

I don’t feel piled on. I just think it’s odd to say “this would be SO MUCH BETTER for my child but I won’t even try it.” Why not try it(not talking about people who have to work)? Many of you mentioned situations where the child doesn’t want it...I’m talking about situations where the child is neutral/likes homeschooling and it’s better academically for the child. Just seems odd to me to dismiss it out of hand.

It’s ok, I know I’m weird. You don’t have to answer me.


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[PrincessFiona]

School in the Fall.

I don’t feel piled on. I just think it’s odd to say “this would be SO MUCH BETTER for my child but I won’t even try it.” Why not try it? Many of you mentioned situations where the child doesn’t want it...I’m talking about situations where the child is neutral/likes homeschooling and it’s better academically for the child. Just seems odd to me to dismiss it out of hand.

It’s ok, I know I’m weird. You don’t have to answer me.


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I have homeschooled, but that was when there were homeschooling groups and we went horseback riding and bowling together. Socializing. This is not homeschooling. It’s crisis schooling. I have yet to have someone tell me their child was doing better. Although the video classes are good enough, questions aren’t asked and answered and there are no discussions on topics. I caught my kids turning off their video and doing other things. I had to constantly be the police. The level of education definitely decreased across the board. Kids need to socialize for healthy attachment and brain development.


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[scarlett09]

That’s tough. I was discussing it with Lambie’s kindergarten teacher who has become a friend to me over the last 5 years that my kids have been in her school. One option for kindergarten parents is to delay their start. It’s not ideal but keeping those kids out of the classroom would allow smaller class sizes and therefore greater distancing in the classroom. Knowing myself, I think it’s very likely I would go that route if I had a kindergartner starting in the Fall and the classroom environment would be much changed from what it is now.


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I can’t delay anymore. She will be 6 (!) in December. I think the district also has an upper age limit for K. But maybe they would consider otherwise? Socially, there will be at least 8 kids we know from daycare and the neighborhood who will start K with her in the fall. This includes her daycare BFF whose mom is a good friend. To not go with her after like 2 years of talking about it would be a huge blow. She would also be bored academically if we held her another year, she can read and write (although her numbers need work).

If it were my youngest with the late August bday, and we were sending her on the young side of 5, I would totally hold her back a year, with no reservations.


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[scarlett09]

The moms at our school suddenly seem like they’re ready to revolt. Someone started circulating those CDC recommendations on Facebook, and the whole thing picked up steam, and now there’s a Facebook group “against” our district adopting those guidelines. At this point our district hasn’t said anything either way, so the whole thing seems a dramatic to me.
I’m really hoping they find a way to do in-person school in the fall, but personally I don’t have a problem with my kids wearing masks or cancelling field trips or anything. I guess that means I’m in the minority around here. 🤷🏼*♀️


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OG - I agree with you. It sucks when you’re the only one who feels that way.

That blue graphic with the paraphrasing and misspelling of the CDC guidelines (not the nice looking one SD shared a couple of posts ago) is leading me to take a FB break. Between the refusing to wear masks or social distance, and that bit of misinformation spreading everywhere, I am at my limit for FB. I want to fight everyone on there and also scream “fuck you all” every time I scroll through my feed. Yeah, not good for my mental health, so break time it is!


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[TulipsAndSunscreen]

I have homeschooled, but that was when there were homeschooling groups and we went horseback riding and bowling together. Socializing. This is not homeschooling. It’s crisis schooling. I have yet to have someone tell me their child was doing better. Although the video classes are good enough, questions aren’t asked and answered and there are no discussions on topics. I caught my kids turning off their video and doing other things. I had to constantly be the police. The level of education definitely decreased across the board. Kids need to socialize for healthy attachment and brain development.


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I didn’t say that was homeschooling. I know crisis schooling isn’t homeschooling, obviously, since I don’t homeschool via Zoom.

I am just curious about the refusal of some to try it. Not talking about anyone here.


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[OrionGrad]

My 5yo is thriving academically since we started distance learning. He went from not reading before this, to being an amazing reader in just a few months. But the reason we had him do TK this year, instead of heading directly into K, was for the socialization aspect. I don’t think I could give him what he needs to learn to deal with different personalities and manage those outside-the-home relationships, even though I know there are some homeschooling parents who do an amazing job at socialization. So that’s why we’re not doing homeschool next year, even though this crisis has really given my kid a leg up academically.


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[SoonerTexan]

I don’t feel piled on. I just think it’s odd to say “this would be SO MUCH BETTER for my child but I won’t even try it.” Why not try it(not talking about people who have to work)? Many of you mentioned situations where the child doesn’t want it...I’m talking about situations where the child is neutral/likes homeschooling and it’s better academically for the child. Just seems odd to me to dismiss it out of hand.

It’s ok, I know I’m weird. You don’t have to answer me.


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I think parent desire is a huge part of why homeschooling works for some and doesn't for others, regardless of how well suited the child is to it. If you truly enjoy it, it's probably going to go well in most situations. If you don't want to do it/don't enjoy it, there's a good chance it isn't going to be a happy experience. There are definitely people who homeschool out of guilt/some feeling that they "have to" or "should" or do it out of a desire to "protect" their children from the world--I see that a lot in religious communities. I definitely have friends that have mulled it in those terms. (In my area, it is what some of the "super Catholics" do)

I could see Jason being interested in homeschooling. I believe I could put together an amazing curriculum for him that catered to his interests and made him a happy and academically successful kid with plenty of peer interaction. At this point in my life I don't think it would be a good thing for me at all. So he will be attending the highly regarded elementary in the district we just bought in. I am totally good with that.

This is where I go on a psychological tangent--I grew up with a mother who poured herself into her kids and was one of those amazing moms who did.it.all and was endlessly loving, but at a huge expense to herself. As we have gotten older, I've come to see how that was not a good thing and how she could have definitely benefitted from more balance as a parent. I think she would be a happier person now if she had done just a little less for us and a lot more for herself--it has caused a lot of strain in our relationship. Everyone tries to fix the mistakes their parents made (while making new ones haha), so my mantra is "good enough is fine" if striving for "the best" for my kids is going to drive me into the ground.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

And I grew up with parents who were self absorbed and didn’t pour anything into us unless it was going to reflect publicly on them in terms of achievement or prestige.

So yeah, it matters to me that I can do something that influences their life and pours into them.


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[Flynn]

I've been a SAHM for 13 years. I have an interest in, and am well versed in, understanding and teaching every single school subject from grammar to physics. I have a firm belief that the one on one attention (or one on several) of learning at home is the absolute best way for any child to learn. In particular, I think that there are exemplary approaches to education that aren't feasible in the group setting that are available to parents teaching at home. And yet I send my kids to mediocre public schools. And although I'm more torn than ever now that I've seen the CDC guidance for reopening schools, keeping them home is still not a slam dunk decision.

For one, the kids have a say. We've offered them homeschool on several occasions and they prefer the school routine and they like seeing their friends daily. For another, a rising tide lifts all boats. I work to improve the public school system for my children, and other children benefit. My work as a volunteer and an advocate has helped most of the 1000 students in the district. If I keep my kids home, my kids learn slightly more, but the district loses all the strides I've made for gifted education, science education, safety, and strategic planning. Plus it intensifies the already crisis-level budget crunch the district is experiencing.

Anyway, this time at home has been terrible for my kids' education. It's the worst of all worlds: the kids have to do the school's work, which is inane and boring and lightweight and disorganized, and have no motivation to do anything enriched that I might offer. It's in no way a preview of homeschooling.

This is me. (Except I could NEVER teach high level science or Math and have two kids in public school and one in private. I'm lucky my kids do well with in the STEM areas with minimal help. )

Homeschooling would not work for us. My kids are too interested in friends, extracurricular activities in school, leadership -- all stuff you cannot duplicate at home. I think there are very real and fundamental reasons to homeschool. My kids just don't fall into any of them. I think one on one learning is fantastic. I also think learning in a group setting with different kids, learning styles, and issues helps kids as well. I firmly believe that team sports helps all students later in life in the work force (as does band, orchestra, choir, drama -- things with bigger groups working together).

I was a teacher before I was a mom. Right now what we are doing is NOT homeschooling and has NOT been good for my kids. This is a public school curriculum given to students virtually. If anything it's more of an on - line learning course. I have a kid taking an AP test from her room today on her computer that is: open book, faster time, abbreviated content. This is NOT how the test was intended to be taken but I also understand how everything is different now and this is the best someone came up with.

Instruction is important. Thinking in small groups with other students is important. HELL -- my kids finding out that other kids don't care about school and will never care is important.

Additionally, assessment is HUGE for any type of learning to be evaluated. Saying "everyone gets Bs" by doing nothing is just plain silly. Yet, the districts hands are tied and I understand that side as well.

I will continue to supplement and help my kids with school anyway I can including volunteering on committees (which I hate) and attending school board meetings etc.

I can't wait to "get back to normal" but I fear that is a long way off. Going to school in waves is going to totally screw with families -- especially ones with both parents working.
We will see what happens.....