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Highly depressing news

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  • Highly depressing news

    Well, it looks like despite all of the positive moves in the last few weeks, the local judge has decided to interpret the new Russian law to mean that Nikolai has to remain on the National database for a total of six months. He will now be "available" on March 26. Which means court in April.

    How exactly this benefits him? Well, I'm not really clear on that. The deal is apparently that he has to remain on the databank, but because he's "undesirable" no one else will want him. Yeah, there's some positive things to say about a less than one-year-old.

    I am beyond angry, have kind of worked through sadness and am hoping that I get stuck at "not eating and really wanting to work out a lot".

    They were able to send us a picture which was great, but also depressing.

    This sucks-

    Jenn

    PS- My advice for people considering a Russian adoption: Get a dog. It's cheaper, it's more immediate, and it's not nearly as heart-wrenching.

  • #2
    Jenn- How frustrating and disappointing to hear about Nikolai and your delay in bringing him home. He needs you. I am so sorry! I hope April comes quickly for you.

    Jennifer
    Needs

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    • #3
      That sucks!!
      How does he look in the photo? Still wearing a pink onesie?

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      • #4
        I'm so sorry. April will be here soon.
        Luanne
        Luanne
        wife, mother, nurse practitioner

        "You have not converted a man because you have silenced him." (John, Viscount Morely, On Compromise, 1874)

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        • #5
          Sometimes you have to wonder what judges are thinking in some of the decisions they make. I'm sorry your reunion with Nikolai has been delayed. I hope the next few months pass quickly for you!

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          • #6
            Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear this! You all have been through so much already, this latest news must be so extra-frustrating for you. I'll be thinking of you guys and your little one, I hope the time passes quickly for you.
            ~Jane

            -Wife of urology attending.
            -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

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            • #7
              Jenn,

              I know you are aching to go get Nikolai. I am so sorry that things didn't go your way (and his!) in regards to the court date. Try to stay busy (not hard with your job!) and the time will pass quickly, as I am sure you know. Maybe you and Rick can get away somewhere for a weekend sometime in the next two months? I can't imagine how discouraging this all must be.

              I will continue to keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.

              Sally
              Wife of an OB/Gyn, mom to three boys, middle school choir teacher.

              "I don't know when Dad will be home."

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              • #8
                "Undesirable" and fervently desired! Ugh. The time will pass more quickly than it seems, I hope.
                Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
                Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

                “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
                Lev Grossman, The Magician King

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                • #9
                  Jenn--I'm so sorry things aren't happening as quickly as you had both hoped. I have great hope that the three of you will be a family soon. Hang on until April

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                  • #10
                    That's so unfair. Hang in there til April and I like the idea of you guys taking a babymoon before the little one arrives. Keep the faith.

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                    • #11
                      Jenn, and

                      oops, entered before I was done.

                      Keep on hanging on, you will be with him soon. You'll be holding his precious little body in your arms before you know it.

                      Beauracracy at its finest.

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                      • #12
                        That is terrible news!!! Makes you wonder who makes these kinds of decisions and whether or not they have a heart at all! I hope the next few months pass by quickly for you.
                        Awake is the new sleep!

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                        • #13
                          I am so sorry to hear about the hold up. Hopefully time will fly by and soon enough it will seem like a distant memory.
                          Mom to three wild women.

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                          • #14
                            Oh Jenn.....

                            I know it seems like forever.



                            kris
                            ~Mom of 5, married to an ID doc
                            ~A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss

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                            • #15
                              Gee, whatever happened to what's best for the child? I guess being in an orphanage for a few months won't kill him - so why not?

                              What a frustrating thing.

                              Jenn, are you and your husband concerned with the potential for attachment disorder with the baby - especially if he is in an institutionalized setting for several more months? From what I understand having friends who've adopted from Eastern bloc countries there seems to be a problem with attachment disorder in children institutionalized.

                              Sorry for such a crappy turn of events.

                              Jennifer
                              Who uses a machete to cut through red tape
                              With fingernails that shine like justice
                              And a voice that is dark like tinted glass

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