I broke up a fight at the playground this last week.
I had just arrived at the park which is located 100 yards from our front door with my 5 y.o., my infant, and a seven year old girl who lives behind us. The little girl's mom and I have decided to help each other out with supervising our kids whenever we're outside to maximize our kids' ability to play outside. She is a single mom, and like us, has no fenced-in yard. This tradeoff seems to be working out fairly well.
Anyway, when we arrived, there was an 11-ish year old sister and brother yelling absolutely horrible things at one another. The sister pushed the boy backwards over the slide so that he tumbled backwards and landed on his neck. He got up with a scary, explosive anger and held her down to bite her on her arm. They continued to say nasty things to each other and push one another. Finally, I set my baby down and told my son and the girl to stay put at the edge of the playground. I walked over, drew my 5'2" frame up and yelled, "THIS IS NOT APPROPRIATE. WHERE ARE YOUR PARENTS? YOU TWO GO HOME NOW!". Suprisingly, they obeyed, got on their bikes, and returned home. The adults playing tennis at the attached courts, who apparently were not the parents, did stop and stare before returning to their game.
A few moments later, a barefoot woman walked out to retrieve a backpack. I was ready to be concilitory towards this mom, who clearly has her hands full, by sharing stories of my little angel's best moments. Although her children were way out of line, I realize that parents don't need more disdain, but support. I intervened in this fight because I'm always complaining that the proverbial village that is necessary to raise kids no longer exists.
At this point, I expected her to say any one of the following: "What happened?", "How dare you interfere?" or "I'm so embarrassed... I'm very sorry....". Instead she glared at me and sent her kids back out to play before returning to her townhome. Her kids proceeded to play unsupervised again and resorted to spouting nasty things to one another. I honestly could not believe my eyes.
If I ever contemplated sending my son out alone at some future point, this nipped that thought in the bud. My fears have always been stranger danger, getting hit by a car, or even his exercising the judgment of a five year old: "Oh, that sewer grate would make a fantastic place to play....". What has become apparent to me is that I need to protect, or at least guide my children, in the face of effectively parentless children who have no one who cares enough to guide them. This whole situation saddened me on so many levels.
I can't believe that I've become the bouncer of the playground.
Kelly
I had just arrived at the park which is located 100 yards from our front door with my 5 y.o., my infant, and a seven year old girl who lives behind us. The little girl's mom and I have decided to help each other out with supervising our kids whenever we're outside to maximize our kids' ability to play outside. She is a single mom, and like us, has no fenced-in yard. This tradeoff seems to be working out fairly well.
Anyway, when we arrived, there was an 11-ish year old sister and brother yelling absolutely horrible things at one another. The sister pushed the boy backwards over the slide so that he tumbled backwards and landed on his neck. He got up with a scary, explosive anger and held her down to bite her on her arm. They continued to say nasty things to each other and push one another. Finally, I set my baby down and told my son and the girl to stay put at the edge of the playground. I walked over, drew my 5'2" frame up and yelled, "THIS IS NOT APPROPRIATE. WHERE ARE YOUR PARENTS? YOU TWO GO HOME NOW!". Suprisingly, they obeyed, got on their bikes, and returned home. The adults playing tennis at the attached courts, who apparently were not the parents, did stop and stare before returning to their game.
A few moments later, a barefoot woman walked out to retrieve a backpack. I was ready to be concilitory towards this mom, who clearly has her hands full, by sharing stories of my little angel's best moments. Although her children were way out of line, I realize that parents don't need more disdain, but support. I intervened in this fight because I'm always complaining that the proverbial village that is necessary to raise kids no longer exists.
At this point, I expected her to say any one of the following: "What happened?", "How dare you interfere?" or "I'm so embarrassed... I'm very sorry....". Instead she glared at me and sent her kids back out to play before returning to her townhome. Her kids proceeded to play unsupervised again and resorted to spouting nasty things to one another. I honestly could not believe my eyes.
If I ever contemplated sending my son out alone at some future point, this nipped that thought in the bud. My fears have always been stranger danger, getting hit by a car, or even his exercising the judgment of a five year old: "Oh, that sewer grate would make a fantastic place to play....". What has become apparent to me is that I need to protect, or at least guide my children, in the face of effectively parentless children who have no one who cares enough to guide them. This whole situation saddened me on so many levels.
I can't believe that I've become the bouncer of the playground.
Kelly
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