Adult Interaction

Hey all-

Alright, so I know that the adult interaction thing for SAHMs has come up on other threads in various forms, but I'm starting to freak out a little that I'm going in at the end of the week to tell my boss that I'm not coming back from maternity leave. Can some of you throw out some suggestions on how you've integrated adult interactions and intelligent discussions into life with the kids?

I'm wondering if I could scam my friends into coming over once a month for a wine and cheese party after the kids have gone to bed--you know, it's like going out, without paying for a babysitter...but other than that, I've been mostly going to the grocery store every other day and purposely going through the line with the real live cashier so I have someone to talk to! I'm sure I'll figure this out eventually, but my friends who work are already kidding around with me about how frequently and quickly I write or respond to emails or call them. Plus, it seems like I don't have anything to tell them anyway, unless it involves my children's digestive habits.

Ahhhh, and I was the one that was so eager to stay home at the beginning of this thing...

Mary
(not as sad as I seem)

It is an adjustment; I'll leave it at that so as not to hijack your thread.

A couple of ideas....try local community centers for low-cost classes (mom and tot sorts of things) as a way to meet other moms. The community centers where I used to live weren't all that great -- here they are so it just depends. If the city parks/rec centers don't offer much, try the YMCA or Jewish Community Center (you don't have to be Jewish). Other classes, though pricier, like Gymboree or Music Together are also good options for just getting out and for meeting others. See if there is a MOPS group nearby (http://www.mops.org). Mothers and More is another group for moms (http://www.mothersandmore.org). There is another that I can't recall the name of (it might be http://www.momsclub.com).

Summertime helps -- go to the park and don't be shy about chatting up another mom. Chances are you will meet someone who feels like you do! And if s/he doesn't -- the next one probably will!

I can't remember how old your oldest is. Will you be doing preschool in the fall? If $$$ is an issue, you could look for a co-op preschool as they are usually less. I'm sure they could put you in touch with other parents of similar aged kids and possibly some playgroups. Most of the families we have met are through DD's preschool.

I think the idea of having friends over is a great one. And then there is always the grocery store clerk.

My advice? Find or form a playgroup. The secret? Playgroups aren't really about the kids. Yeah, you go someplace that the kids will enjoy, etc., but it's really about getting to talk to other adults with somewhat similar positions in life at least once a week.

Mine was formed out of the hospital's breastfeeding support group, so we're all nursing mommas with kiddos roughly the same age. We rotate a house or other location (playground, zoo, story hour, special event, etc.) each week. We also keep up via email, etc. We'll meet up for other stuff periodically (ex: summer reading programs, like the miniature horses we got to go see last week, etc.).

Until this month, we've always done playgroup on Wednesdays from 10-11:30ish and have muffins and fruit and stuff. The local library had a baby and toddler story hour going on Fridays, so we did that. We also did a toddler art class that we all went to. It's all the same group of us, so the kids have gotten to be friends.

Over the summer, we're doing playgroup on Fridays and meeting up at the playground on Wednesday mornings before it gets so hot. We didn't want to be tied down with anything else what with summer travel, etc.

Check into story hours, etc. Some might even have puppet shows that work well for younger toddlers.

Moms Club International or MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers--church-based) might also be good options.

HTH!

Carrie
Mom to a 2YR daughter and babysitter to a 1YO boy, wife to a nontrad premed student awaiting August MCAT

[DCJenn]

I went online and googled "DC and Mother's groups" and found several. I picked the one that seemed to match the best and it's avery active group. They have cooking clubs and book clubs and fitness groups, etc. Then I signed up for Stroller Strides and I go at least every MWF. There's a group of regulars that go and pretty much we are gabbing the entire time. (Well, not during some of the exercises!)

I have no neighbors with kids so if I didn't force myself out of the house, I'd go crazy. I get out of the house every day by 8:30am, if only to walk the dog and the babe around the neighborhood. I figure eventually someone will move in with kids.

I also go to the Gymboree class with N. once a week. There's a bit of socialization there, too.

Jenn

The library is a great idea!

I just thought of another thing -- zoo membership or membership at museums, etc that your child enjoys. With a membership you usually get a quarterly or monthly newsletter that lets you know about events you can take your child to -- and you're sure to find other parents there too!

My experience...
Go to story time at the library, especially if they have a babies story time. Its a fairly new concept, but that is where most of my friends were made.
Try out LLL if you are nursing and ask some of the moms out to lunch afterwards if there are any you click with. i only went to like 3 meetings in total, but saw the friends regularly.
Go to the playground or any other child-focused places.
Put your name, children's names and your phone # on cards and carry them in your bag. Hand them out frequently.
Check out the local mall for a mom's club.


Memberships to child focused places make GREAT gifts from grandparents, and won't clutter up the house.

That is a great idea to ask for a membership as a gift!! It doesn't introduce new "stuff" into the house. I love it!

One of the things I love about our zoo membership is how low-key the visits are. If it starts to rain or someone pitches a fit, we just leave and we aren't out the admission fee. I have more than paid for memberships to the zoo, science museum, botanic gardens, etc. I do try to stagger the membership renewal dates so that I'm not hit with the expense all at once.

Or you can just live in DC like Jenn where all that stuff is free! (Only a little bit jealous).