Help me! DS has speech delay!

Hi all-

Ok, I need help from anyone who has gone through this--at DS's 15-month checkup, the Ped was concerned that he was babbling, but not saying words. At 18-months, he sent us for hearing tests (which were fine) and speech therapy analysis, which yielded results that indicated that he had a speech delay.

One month later, we're almost up to about 10 words now (dada, no, sissy, bye-bye, ball, cracker, Nana, night-night) but he had his first speech pathologist appt today and I'm feeling discouraged again. She gave me a Rosetti scale (?) analysis which determined that his receptive language is at a 9-12 month level and his expressive language is at a 6-9 month level.

I had no idea he was so behind! Has anybody else been through this? What did I do wrong? I feel like the world's worst mother right now...and I've got another little one now! Who let me have kids? Help!

[DCJenn]

First, relax. You're not at fault here.

We're dealing with a bit of a delay here, mostly due to language acquisition. They tested his hearing and he appears to hear well. But, he's Russian, babbled in Russian and understood spoken Russian. The audiologist wanted us to see a Speech Pathologist and I refused. I think 2 months in America is a little soon for us to be rushing off to Speech professionals.

Did your son have any prolonged ear infections? I know that when they can't hear properly, they obviously can't learn sounds properly, either. I know of several people whose kids were delayed until they got tubes put in the ears.

Jenn

Oh yeah, sorry for the exclamation points.

This is the weird thing--he's only had one ear infection ever! However, when he did have the hearing test, they found fluid in his ear, but it cleared up on its own within two weeks.

My mother, who is a teacher, was severely annoyed by all of this and thought it was much too soon to be worrying about it. But it seems like he is pretty far behind, according to this speech pathologist. I just don't know ANYTHING about all of this, so I'm kinda being led around blindly. I'm trying to do research on my own, but I have no idea where to begin...

[mommax3]

Okay, the following is anecdotal, but hopefully there will be something inside that will be helpful.....

My oldest son, who is EXTREMELY bright, did not talk much at all until right around his 2nd bday. I was starting to be concerned because all he had were one or two word phrases, while other kids his age were starting to talk in short sentences. Just after he turned 2, we moved (residency) to San Antonio, and he started talking in not just sentences, but PARAGRAPHS.....and he has hardly been silent since! My mother said that I was the same way. So, it may just be that he is the oldest child, and when he gets ready to talk, he will be all over it.

My niece has a severe speech delay. Last fall, as she turned three, she still said virtually nothing. She didn't babble as a baby or toddler, and the noises she did make were very high and breathy, not really compatible with speech. She is adopted, although not from another country, but there was some history of speech impediment, and to complicate matters, my BIL & SIL moved three times, from NV to TX to NC during the year Kate was two. I (gently) expressed my concern to them, but they were unable to really get anything started as far as therapy until they were done moving. She has started therapy and will be in it for a long while, most likely.....however, she is REALLY smart and I bet she can read.....she knows everything anyone ever says to her.

My best friend's youngest child and only boy babbled, etc. at normal times, but did have a long history of ear infections. He made a lot of noise, but was unintelligible except to those that lived with him. He started speech therapy a little over a year ago, and made wonderful progress. He LOVED going to his class.

I don't know if your son is in daycare or if he is around other children very much, but it has been my experience that being around other kids will make even the most reluctant talker speak up. If your son gets to be 2 and nothing much has changed, I would get going with a speech pathologist. But if he starts progressing, I would hold off for awhile. I think, personally, that 19 months is a little young to be concerned, especially for a boy. And however it turns out, none of it is your fault! You may want to ask your mom and your husband's mom about when you both began talking, if they can remember. That information may provide some insight and perspective. Hang in there and keep us posted!

Sally

My bestest friends daughter was classifed as having speech delay and now at 5 she routinely uses words like arduous and ridiculous in her daily speech. She was in therapy from 18 months til this past spring.

[Meenah]

Caroline didn't speak very much until she was 1 1/2 years old, then she took off and hasn't stopped. She had a 3.5 last semester in her second year of college!!!!!
Luanne

Yes, you are all good--I really just need to be told that everything is going to work out fine and that I didn't mess the poor child up already!

I did check and my husband was a late talker (I joked, Yes--it was about sophomore year of college before I heard you speak in sentences, right?) and so was my brother, mother, and uncle. And although this gets a bit distant, my cousin's son did the no talk, followed by an explosion of sentences suddenly.

My father has an interesting theory on all of this: he tells me that my DS is so spoiled and gets everything he'd ever want, so he doesn't bother to ever use words. Ha ha.

And interestingly enough, he learned most of these new words shortly after his new baby sister came home...and I think his favorite is "Bye Bye" when sissy starts crying...

Ok, but keep the funny stories coming because they make me feel better!

[PrincessFiona]

My daughter didn't start really talking until she was two. All of a sudden, it was full sentences...as a matter of fact, she would wake me up by sitting on the edge of my bed and talking me to death! There's a lot of variation in language acquisition in kids. Good for your pediatrician (and for you) for checking it out though. The speech therapy certainly can't hurt.

Andrew (age 10) has always been a little on the clutsy side..we just chalked it up to him being more of a 'math' kid and less of a 'sports' kid. We ended up getting him tested though and found out that he has horrible pronation of his feet and that he tested below the 1st percentile for his age...at 4 years 7 months I felt like I had failed him by not noticing it, but the truth is that as his mother I just didn't realize how different he was until his then 5 year old brother was throwing/walking/running/kicking/jumping circles around him. When I drew the comparison between the two of them last summer, I was stunned (It's what prompted the consult actually.)

The good news is, Andrew has accomplished an incredible amount in a short time....He no longer stumbles and is able to ride his bike and run now without getting tired or having leg pain.

The only thing that honestly bothers me about all of these consults for ST, OT and PT is that they seem so open-ended. They set goals for the kids, but basically, they seem to set the goals in such a way that the kids could be in therapy for years.

kris

[Sheherezade]

It seems everywhere we have lived we've had a neighbor's child with a speech delay. They have always ended up talking just fine, but a little later. I'm sure you're baby will be the same way. It sounds like you are checking out all the angles, just in case. Nobody in my family has ever had trouble talking; in fact, you can't get us to shut up. Unfortunately, there is no therapy available for that!

[DCJenn]

To dovetail onto Kris' "never-ending therapy" note- it is true that there are some therapist who keep it going forever. I think the OT and PT consultants in San Antonio probably have my picture pasted on a dart board. I'm sorry, but there is a statute of limitations. (like if the man is 50 years old and the OT is still working with him to tie his shoes, lets save the $ for vacation and buy slip on or velcro shoes instead!!)

My friend's daughter had a birth injury (Erb's palsy) and was seen weekly, then monthly then every other month for her first year. The PT DID help, but now she's at the point that the exercises are no different than what she's doing in daycare- crawling around on the floor, etc. My point, be aware that you can stop therapy once you the parent reach a comfort level that things are better.

and back to the story at hand, my former boss oce told us about her younger brother who didn't speak until he was nearly 4. They had taken him to ENT, Speech, etc. and had diagnosed him as developmentally delayed. One day, he started speaking in complete paragraphs. and get this, when she asked why he hadn't started speaking until then he said, "Janey, I didn't know all the words yet." Needless to say the DD dx went away and the gifted label was quickly attached.

Jenn

My brother didn't speak for awhile but that was because I spoke for him. I guess that's a trait I haven't given up yet, just ask my husband!

When DS was2 I brought him in to be observed by a speech pathologist becuase I was concerned about his speech (or lack there of). They agreed that there *could* be a problem, but thought he was too young to be certain. at 36 months it was obvious - as I was the only person who could understnad anything he said - and that was minimal. He started to work with a speech pathologist. He could only make 5 of the basic sounds. Two years later and there are only a few sounds that he has trouble with. Now he works on the grammatical part of language (he was focusing on sounds when it was time to learn grammer). Our pathologist assured us that we did nothing wrong.

As it turns out, the speech pathologist that my son saw was the same speech pathologist I saw as a child. I had the exact speech delay as Zach. I worked with the pathologist until I was in 6th grade and now there are very few remanents of any speech problems (some say I have an interesting accent).

It is good that you caught it and are working on it. He will be fine!
Miranda