Cool Update...

This is kind of neat, so I thought I'd share it with you...last night at the skating party, Andrew's teacher was there...and we spent the whole evening together chatting...she told me how well Andrew has adjusted and that he is having no problems in the classroom with anxiety anymore...and works independently doing other projects...when he's done with the assigned work....I was so happy to hear this and so relieved that all of my worrying lately has been just worrying. To top it off, she invited our family to come to her vacation home on the lake this summer ....I volunteer in her classroom and we've gotten to know each other gradually throughout the year, but I never really thought that she liked me (low self-esteem). I just feel so good about this....I really needed that! I told her that I thought that it would be really nice and that it would be a real treat for the kids and she even mentioned it to Andrew....

And.....as if that weren't enough good news...it turns out that the girl that Finny was poking at last week in ballet class (the reason for her having to leave early) and playing with before class ALSO has some problems with social shyness and the mom was not only NOT upset about it, but she was excited because here daughter "olivia" was having trouble interacting with others and had few friends....and that she had spent the week last week waiting to have ballet with Finny!!! I just...was so happy about this all!!! The girls played together Wed. again before class and this time were able to be more disciplined in class...and they also added one more girl to their little group to play with .... and so we are all going to get the girls together outside of ballet class.

It's funny how things work out, isn't it? I spend WAY too much time worrying and feeling bad about little things...at least that's what my hubby says....I don't know if it's just a "mom thing" that we just want things to go well for our children or if it's just me over-worrying things....but I can honestly say that I feel so relieved this week that things have worked out so well lately...and I thought I'd add this positive update for a change....

Kris
Time is a Dressmaker, Specializing in Alterations!

Kris that is wonderful news! It sounds like the kids are doing great and it must be so NICE to have such positive feedback! That is something that Andrew's teacher invited you out to her place this summer. It does sound like things are going great!!!

Just out of curiosity ... what is Olivia's mom's name. One of my best friends from high school has an Olivia and lives in your general area and I believe is 5. I just can't resist asking.

Robin

Thanks, Robin...it is nice to have a positive perspective on things from time to time.

It doesn't mean that some of the same concerns that we've had aren't valid with Andrew, because he does experience anxiety until he adjusts to new situations and we still are going through with our evaluation....It is interesting that the teacher never spoke with me really about his improvement. We've waited months for his doctor's appt. and went in basically armed with what we were told by the teacher/school at the beginning of the year, assuming that that hadn't changed much because we hadn't been TOLD otherwise...I asked her why she'd never told me that things had gotten so much better for him and she admitted that feedback often comes when there is a problem and she apologized. She also told me not to worry about it all so much...that Andrew is going to do fine and that she will help us find a good teacher for second grade. Interestingly, she sees Amanda almost every Thursday because I volunteer in Andrew's room on Thursdays and she laughed when I told her about what happened in the other classroom with the "mean mommy". "Parents can be awful" is what she told me! I really have to stop worrying about what other people think and strive to have some self-confidence!!!

As far as Finny is concerned, I feel much better after talking to the other moms at ballet...realizing that other moms who I consider to be good moms have similar problems with their children...they handle themselves and the problems with more self-confidence and don't blame themselves if something goes wrong.. One of the moms works full-time and has had her children in full-time daycare since day 1, is a compassionate, caring mom, and is very self-confident about what happens with her kids. She is also a teacher and I talked to her last Wed. about the things that have happened this year. She told me that she purposefully did not apply to work in our district after interning there because of the prevailing attitudes and that in her 7 years of teaching she has only become more frustrated with the teaching attitudes of many of her colleagues, as well as those of many parents...it is really interesting to listen to her.

I'll have to find out what Olivia's mom's name is...her grandmother brings her to dance each week...and actually, none of the parents are on a first name basis We only know our children's names... A good reminder that we should find out who WE are!!!

Kris
Time is a Dressmaker, Specializing in Alterations!

My friend's grandmother doesn't live in Minnesota so I guess it isn't her but I did think it was pretty coincidental that the only other person I know in Minnesota has a 5-year old daughter named Olivia. Anyway...

I have a lot of empathy for the teachers, especially in this day and age. They are pulled in all directions. The parents can be terrible to deal with and I really admire the teachers who have so much patience and really work with the children. The disciplining has gotten more complicated too. When I was growing up, kids got spanked and though I am not an advocate of that, there was definitely more respect shown to the teachers by the kids. I had planned on becoming a teacher, received a college scholarship in fact from a teacher's association but ... I changed midstream because I felt like I had to be good at absolutely everything and I just didn't know if I had what it took to be a great teacher and not willing to get paid hardly anything for the privilege. I opted for school pschology but never quite got that far (bachelor's in psch and then marriage and kids.)

Anyway... It's great that you volunteer in the class and can see how Andrew is doing while you are there. I loved being the class mom for Jacob when he was in first grade. We moved here the day before he started school (have I told that story? It's a humdinger!) He was so shy and was behind in reading etc. It was so nice to go to class and help once in awhile and see how he was doing. He loved it too!

Parenting is the hardest job anyone can ever do, if you want to do it right.

Robin