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At what age to you guys consider it ok to allow a child to spend limited time home alone? This is a huge issue for me right now. We have acquaintances that have allowed their child to stay home alone for an hour or two since first or second grade....and other friends with a daughter Andrew's age (11) that babysits his two younger sisters (4th grade and 2nd grade).
I have gradually given Andrew more 'stay-at-home' responsibility, as I remember staying home alone during the day if I was sick during 4th grade or for brief stints. He's in 5th grade now and is pretty responsible. I have also let him stay at home very briefly (read: 35 minutes one time and 1 hour the next time) with Alex while I went to an u/sound and while I took Amanda to her dance class. The time I was gone for an hour, I actually called 5 times and he finally told me "do not call back here again, Mom". The kids are allowed to sit at the table and do their reading/math assignments (if they don't have anything, I pull something out of a workbook) and then they can watch tv.
They have my cell phone number and Thomas' cell phone number...and despite all of that and the fact that so many of our acquainances/friends allow this and my daughter's teacher even suggested that Amanda could watch Alex (age almost 7) for short periods of time and I should 'get over myself'....I can't....get over myself. To me, it doesn't feel right...I feel like the kids should be in 8th grade or something before they can be on their own for an hour or two....
Everyone tells me I'm just being too over-protective...even Thomas thinks I'm being silly.
Am I?
The kids don't fight when I leave them, they do the homework that they are told to do and don't destroy the house....and yet...I quiver "what if there is a fire? What if there is a storm? What if someone gets hurt? what if....."
kris
I have gradually given Andrew more 'stay-at-home' responsibility, as I remember staying home alone during the day if I was sick during 4th grade or for brief stints. He's in 5th grade now and is pretty responsible. I have also let him stay at home very briefly (read: 35 minutes one time and 1 hour the next time) with Alex while I went to an u/sound and while I took Amanda to her dance class. The time I was gone for an hour, I actually called 5 times and he finally told me "do not call back here again, Mom". The kids are allowed to sit at the table and do their reading/math assignments (if they don't have anything, I pull something out of a workbook) and then they can watch tv.
They have my cell phone number and Thomas' cell phone number...and despite all of that and the fact that so many of our acquainances/friends allow this and my daughter's teacher even suggested that Amanda could watch Alex (age almost 7) for short periods of time and I should 'get over myself'....I can't....get over myself. To me, it doesn't feel right...I feel like the kids should be in 8th grade or something before they can be on their own for an hour or two....
Everyone tells me I'm just being too over-protective...even Thomas thinks I'm being silly.
Am I?
The kids don't fight when I leave them, they do the homework that they are told to do and don't destroy the house....and yet...I quiver "what if there is a fire? What if there is a storm? What if someone gets hurt? what if....."
kris
:!
The weather was good and he was in no danger - but he totally panicked. It set us back light years in terms of his independence. He became so anxiety riddled that he wouldn't let me leave the house to take the new puppy in to the yard without him. We won't be trying that again for a long, long time. I t would probably help to try it only after he knows the neighbors well enough that he could go to them for help if necessary. (We're getting there with that.)
Can you say "projection"?
Then...once I had given Andrew and Amanda the leeway, Alex who had only completed Kindergarten was off and riding outside of the cul-de-sac.
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