drop off birthday parties

[Flynn]

How old were your kids when they started going to birthday parties without a parent?

My daughter is not quite three and a half and she's not ready for this but has several friends in school who are turning 4 and apparently having drop off parties. I have never met some of these parents either...

So what's your experience with this?
Your thoughts?

I think it started around 5 with us.
At 4, if it was with people we knew and another parent was staying (v. familiar with my child), I would consider drop-off. And make sure they have my phone number.

[Phoebe]

My daughter turned 4 years last fall and our birthday party included the parents. All of the birthday parties she has attended also included the parents. I don't think I would allow my daughter to go to a birthday party without me at this age unless there were a small number of children and it was a friend or neighbor that I knew very well.


Jennifer

[PrincessFiona]

Kindergarten or First Grade....

[SueC]

We've only done this once--the other day my 6 year old was invited to a birthday party, and although I could have hung around, a few of us did go down the street for a drink during most of the party so that we wouldn't be in the way. We hardly ever do the drop-off kinds of parties because we travel in the same social circle as our kids so it's a social thing for us, too (we're such happening folks ).

[mommax3]

My oldest was 2 weeks away from being five the first time I "left" him at a bday party. It was a preschool friend's party and I had known the mom for two years. I stayed for the first fifteen minutes and then left for about an hour and a half. My second son was about 22 months old, and he was a pain to watch at stuff like that, AND we were flying to Philadelphia (it ended up being a trip from hell, btw) that evening sans DH of course, so I used the time to run a few last minute errands.

Sally

[Rapunzel]

1st grade (or about 6 years old) for us....

The last party DS went to about 1/2 the parents stayed and half dropped off. The kids are in kindergarten. I stayed because DS wanted me to, and I am kinda glad I did because it was at a resturant and it was pretty hard to keep track on him one on one.

[Sheherezade]

We did our first drop off with DD at 4.5. Way to young!!! It was with a good friend who lived in a tiny city apartment. I failed to factor in that she was Japanese, that most of the kids coming were Japanese and that the primary language spoken would be Japanese. No matter that she was a great mother -figure and very kind - my daughter was scarred for years after. Refused to be dropped off with ANYONE for fear of falling in to another dimension in which nobody speaks your language.

I think the average age is around 6. In Boston, it was older than here. I think in a small town setting, people are a little more comfortable with each other. (I'm still city paranoid with my kids.)

[Meenah]

Angie I know I'm not supposed to laugh at this but you have such a way with words!!!!!
Luanne

I wouldn't even THINK of suggesting a drop-off party simply b/c I don't want to be solo with 5 or 10 kids the same age of my children! I know eventually it will happen, but I think I can still get away with another party w/parents.

[PrincessFiona]

I just have to add that I had a 'drop off party' for Amanda when she was in preschool (turning 4)....I specifically wrote it on the invite because I was so embarassed about our home (we lived in a yucky place during fellowship) and I didn't want moms/dads watching me...plus I knew it would mean buying snacks for the parents.

It was the biggest mistake ever. Thomas didn't end up making it home from the hospital in order to help me, the dog pooped in the backyard and the kids all got dog poop on their shoes, and I was hopelessly, hopelessly overwhelmed. When the parents came to pick up their offspring, I had finally gotten them all in front of a video and I was scrubbing dog poop off of their shoes with an old tooth brush.

I, personally, would never DO another drop off party before the kids were 5 or 6....really.

kris

I tell ya, it used to be SO easy. All of the kids's friends were the children of our friends, and we all hung out and snacked and chatted while the kids played games and snacked. Then we opened presents, had cake and snacked and chatted some more while the kids played. Sigh.

[Amiens]

It's only been in the last few months that Emma has gone to drop-off parties, and she is 4. However these have all been with people we know. I probably wouldn't do it with someone we didn't know very until she was in 1st grade.

Crystal