Favorite pregnancy/parenting zingers

[houseelf]

Michelle's comments about weight gain made me think of some of the asinine comments people make to the preggers and new parents. Want to share?

My personal favorites:

"Do you always eat this much or is this a pregnancy thing?"

"Don't worry, you are only gaining weight in your belly and butt."

"Was this one planned?"

"How long you gonna keep breastfeeding that kid?"

Kelly

[SueC]

Here's my favorite (or least favorite...)
Haven't you guys figured out how to prevent that yet? It's so hysterical and clever...

[Flynn]

"It cracks me up to see you so bloated and big. Now you know what the rest of the world feels like all the time. Now you are a "normal" size."

[Phoebe]

In reference to having third child due at the end of Sept...

"Couldn't you have just left the house?" :>

Jennifer

[BonBon]

My swiss cheese brain can't recall any good ones right now, but we are just starting to announce our news of #3 so I can't wait to hear what people have to say about that...esp considering #2 is only 6 months old.

People suck. (Thanks, Kelly. That's one of my favorite phrases. )

[Meenah]

People suck. (Thanks, Kelly. That's one of my favorite phrases. )

Kelly this is my favorite quote too!!!!

The perfect response "It's none of your business!"

or --

"Wow. You caught me off guard. I can't believe you actually ASKED such a rude question."

[Amiens]

When we had Brigham- "Awww now you have a boy and a girl, a perfect match. You're done aren't you?"

Now that we have had Reed, I have heard "Oh were you trying for another girl, and didn't get one?"

Crystal

[Michele]

I have to say I really hate the "was it planned?"


It's none of your f'in business. Ugh!

Actually I usually give them this sick look of disgust like I cn't believe you actually asked that....I'm not very good at hiding my emotions behind my eyes...oops.

[Vanquisher]

When I was pregnant, I recieved the following -

At 5 months -

"Don't go and have that baby right here."
"I'm not due until January."
"Are you having twins?"
"No."
"Triplets?"


Inappropriate, unauthorized touching of the belly at all times.

"Oh my God, you're huge."
"Wow, Heidi, I thought I got big when I was pregnant."
"Wow, Heidi, when you said you got big during pregnancy, I didn't really believe you."


After parenthood, it's mostly my MIL that drives me bonkers with her comments and parenting advice, but I have had the occasional stranger who wants to hold or touch my baby. "Ummm, no!" Plus, they always seem to have an investment in their warmth and socks. Why don't you try keeping socks on her, you old cow!

When my son was 18 months old (tall), I has a lady ask him what his name was. When he didn't answer, she asked him if he was 3. When he still didn't answer she asked, "Two?" I interjected, "he is 18 months." For the love of Maude, please stop looking at my baby like he is a retarded toddler!

[DCJenn]

We haven't gotten anything too wierd NOW but when people knew we were in the process of adopting? Wow. "Oh, you're adopting." "Did you try IVF?" and if I had the mental energy to answer questions that were no ones business to ask in the first place... "No. We avoided the entire treatment aspect all together." "Really? You don't want one of your own?" (never did I have the guts to say, "how would he be less of my own?")

Which brings me to my other soap box which I touched on in the TomKat thread- Tom and Nicole have two children. Not two adopted children. Does anyone say "Tom and Katie have a biological child." It's not anyone else's story to tell. and yesterday, in an interview with Angelina Jolie, the NBC lady referred to her two kids as "Angelina Jolie's adopted children." No Duh! It's like it makes them less important than the one she's giving birth to. and to her credit she did a great job of always referring to her kids as her kids...period. After we first got home with Nikolai we obviously had a new addition to the family so we explained to the neighbors, etc. But now? It's not my story to tell. If he chooses to tell people when he's growing up, that's his business. We'll never hide the fact that he was adopted from Russia, but I won't disclose it to strangers. I'm sure when they do the "where were you born" thing in elementary school, he'll have a more interesting story than some. but it's his story to tell!

Jenn

PS- end of soap box...

When we had Brigham- "Awww now you have a boy and a girl, a perfect match. You're done aren't you?"

Now that we have had Reed, I have heard "Oh were you trying for another girl, and didn't get one?"

Crystal

The boy/girl stuff drives me crazy. After we had a second girl, I was surprised by people asking if we would try again for a boy. As if we, specifically DH, should be disappointed. I can understand that people sometimes hope for one or another but having other people comment on the arrival of a HEALTHY baby with a hint of disappointment because of her parts makes me .

And of course, any of the "is she.....yet" and "is she still...." are always fun.

[Gwendolyn]

I was gigantic...I'm 5'11'' and had a 10lb6oz baby, but it didn't help matters when in my ninth month, upon seeing me in the hallway one of my professors actually burst out laughing!

There was also the woman in my program who, after hearing me talk about the ultrasound, launched into three horror stories about birthing including a mother dying and another about the baby dying!!

How stupid can you get?!?

[houseelf]

Oh yeah, I LOVE how everyone shares their nightmare pregnancy and labor delivery stories with the expectant mom. I forgot about that.

Kelly

[planet]

True story:

First day of class, we (moms) are all sitting together outside of the classroom. One of the moms asked another if this was her first child. The mom answers that it is, but that she has triplets at home. The questioning mom then, in front of us all, asks if they did IVF and how many tries it took.

It didn't stop. Questioning mom got more and more invasive with her questions. The mom of triplets went shopping the next class time. Come on!? I realize IVF is more common these days, but that is so intrusive!