creep alert!

[Sheherezade]

I had an icky experience on our flight home from Las Vegas. One of the male flight attendents was speaking to another crew member at the back of the plane. He was talking about a co worker that was now flying out of Hawaii, China and the Phillipines. He said that the guy could probably pick himself up a "sweet little 12 year old" there.

I though I had misunderstood, but later I found him chatting at the bathrooms with a young girl (about 10) and it was totally inappropriate. He was asking her about Vegas, if she had fun, won any money and looking her up and down suggestively. It really creeped me out. Later, when he came to our row he paid special attention to my little girl - calling her "my little beauty" and stroking her hand when he gave her her drink. I nearly vomited and changed seats with her.

Anyway.....I don't really know what you can do if you just overhear someone say something skeevy and get a bad impression from their interactions. I just wanted to put out a warning should anyone fly with (or without) their kids. DH thinks I should report the guy, but I can't think of anything he really did that was illegal/wrong. Any thoughts?

i think you should report him, too. if nothing else, his behavior & language was inappropriate as the in-flight face of the airline. if there are other complaints, yours may help to piece together a pattern. you never know.

ICK!

[fluffhead]

ugh! ::
But as long as the guy doesn't actually *do* anything, I don't suppose he can be punished?
Though I think people who overhear this stuff should give him a piece of their minds.
That is really disturbing.

[SuzySunshine]

I agree - even an anonymous letter if you're not comfortable - they may have no idea who they have on their planes.

[planet]

Angie,

I would absolutely report this! It isn't going to make a difference short term, but if future complaints are made or a suspicion arises from a different incident it may lead to an otherwise overlooked investigation avenue. The ages you are talking about are so disturbing. This is a pedophile. Go with your instinct and make sure there is a paper trail on this guy...for someone else's sake.

[Sheherezade]

I'm glad you all feel that way. I felt the same way, but these types of accusations can really ruin someone's life if you are wrong. I suppose the company will just put the information on file and it will be there if anyone else makes a compaint along the way. All this JonBenet stuff has got me thinking about how these creeps make contact. Honestly, a flight attendant gig is probably a pretty good deal for them - particularly now that registered sex offenders have to "report" in a new neighborhood. If you are flying around the world and staying in hotels all the time, who's to know?

We had a sex offender offer to buy a 10 year old boy from his mom in Boston on our school playground after hours. Sadly, after the police picked him up for lewd behavior, he only went to a psych facility for 1 mos. Afterward, he was back in the neighborhood, but forbidden from entering school property. The parents in our neighborhood were told by the school to look out for him.

It's a scary world out there.

I agree that he sounds creepy. But like Fluff said, he didn't actually do anything wrong (in response to your comment about this sort of thing ruining someone's career if you are wrong). If I wrote a letter, I would focus on his comment about the friend flying to Hong Kong. That way they have a record of a complaint and if nothing else it can be noted that he was having inappropriate conversations during work.

With security screenings that must, one would hope, be done on flight attendants, wouldn't being a registered sex offender come up? Or at least a record of charges that, IMO, would dis-qualify a flight attendant? I would hope that would be checked out since minors traveling alone are often in the care of flight attendants.

[Sheherezade]

I'm curious about that, as well. Sometimes, screening policies can surprise you. We were considering an overnight camp for my son one year -- a program endorsed by the school district --and I asked the school administrators if the staff at the camp was screened. She called to find out. (surprise #1....she didn't know) The camp said they were not required to screen because of their small size. (surprise #2) Afterword, the school gave me a hard time for bringing it up and asked me "Haven't you ever just trusted anyone?" Apparently, the school district had a relationship with this program and didn't want me "upsetting" the camp. (uh......surprise #3! She didn't care about the screening!)

I'm glad we aren't in that district anymore.

about the camp.

I'm just guessing at this. During high school, a friend's mom started working as a flight attendant and I remember that they had really strict rules about being appropriate, esp in regard to not perpetuating the sexy flight attendant stereotype. That made me wonder about what kinds of background checks they do. I just remembered that one of my mom's friends flies for United. I'll ask her. I'm curious!

From a union website press release regarding Northwest proposing to outsource cabin crews:

Lawmakers and AFA-CWA say they're concerned that foreign-based flight attendants won't be subject to adequate background screening. Presently, U.S. flight attendants are subject to extensive 10-year criminal background checks, fingerprinting, FAA certification and random drug and alcohol testing.

[/quote]

[Sheherezade]

But apparently.....they do check the criminal backgrounds of flight attendents.

I just checked. That doesn't mean the guy wasn't a creep, right? Just an undetected creep.

There goes the plot for my next book.

I looked at a few other things, job postings etc, and it is FAA required to have the 10 year "look-back". I suppose that someone could have something on their record more than 10 years back.

You're right, doesn't mean he wasn't a creep.

[DCJenn]

It might have been one of those "for shock value" only conversations but nonetheless, NO ONE needs to hear it.

I'd report it- and add the caveat that you freely admit to overhearing the conversation. You can then add in though that since you overheard it, chances are that other people over heard it and whatever the reality of the situation, it's an inappropriate conversation to have in a bar at 3am let alone at 30k feet with families aboard.

Jenn

[Sheherezade]

I agree Jenn....that's what I thought about the conversation. I thought they must be kidding. Who would say something like that to a coworker? For whatever reason, we had an all male crew. I thought it was odd that these two guys would both consider this conversation OK. The less creepy guy in the conversation did seem confused by his "get a sweet little 12 year old" remark. He asked him what he meant by that. The creepy guy just dropped it.

It was the behavior of this guy towards the young girls (including my 7 year old) afterward that really freaked me out. Later, he sidled up to the 10 year old girl waiting for the bathrooms and started chatting her up. He was talking to her like you talk to someone in a bar. You know -- "Hey, good looking, where have you been all my life?" --that kind of thing. I went to stand next to her. He quickly left. Ordinarily, I would just think he was being cute by calling my daughter "my little beauty" and tickling her hand. But....it was kinda creepy. He also paid no attention what so ever to my son - or any of the adults. He was pretty much a grumpy middle aged guy.

Bleh. I'm going to have to think how to write a letter that conveys my concern but doesn't sound a red alert. If the flight attendents were just joking around to make their day more interesting, that's just so wrong. Yuck.

add all of those things together, and i really think it is something that should be reported. they are the face of the airline, and whether he meant it or not, it was inappropriate. his behavior is scary ... i want other moms like you around all the time to stand next to kids when stuff like that happens!

if he'd only made the 'joke' :: that would be bad enough, but include his behavior -- and his departure from the chit chat w/the kid once you arrived ... go ahead and report it.

if anyone can craft that letter, you can.