Are your kids' childhoods similar to your childhoods?

I was thinking the other day about how DH and I have saved a ton of our toys to give to our child, and when I thought about what those toys are....Barbies, Cabbage Patch Kids, GI Joe, etc....I realized a lot of those toys are still ones kids play with today. I know toys are just one part of the equation, but how different or similar would you say your kids' childhoods are/were to the ones we had growing up? It seems that your kids' childhoods are more similar to our childhoods growing up than our parents' were to ours.....

I know now that there's more technological stuff and kids are more tech-savvy, but beyond that, what are the similarities and differences?

What do you think?

Wow - I think about this a lot. Too much, probably.

Toys. Sure they play with a lot of the same toys but there are just so many MORE of them available. You can google literally any word with "toy" and find so many stores. Think about Barbie. We had a couple of Barbie dolls and I wanted the house so bad (never got it ) and now there are so many different Barbies and accessories. Definitely more tech toys and definitely more "your kid won't be smart unless you buy this" toys.

Activities. Honestly, I remember just sitting around at home a LOT. Playing in my room and watching TV . . .playing in the backyard and going to the library. I took *maybe* one class per week (ballet) and never more than that. There was no Gymboree, Little Gym, children's museums, Kindermusik, etc. Don't get me wrong, most of those are great additions but I think it also produces this insane amount of pressure on parents. Like you are a total slacker if your kids just sit at home and don't do "anything". It makes you feel guilty (and NOT rightfully so) if you just do "nothing" with your kids all day.

Pressure. I am so tired of the learning toys (me, personally, hope I don't offend anyone). A toy laptop for a baby?! I get that they are growing up in a different world with cells, internet, etc. but I know that when I was growing up, no one gave a @&*# if you didn't know your ABCs when you were 3! Now you hear a lot of "Oh, does your 18 month old know how to count to ten?" and the like.

Anyway, enough . I think they are living in a different time. Some aspects are definitely better, some are not.

Signed,
TOTAL SLACKER MOM

One of the reasons DH and I don't have kids, and are very seriously considering never having kids is that today's parenting environment is so competetive. Like the FairQueen, I sat at home alot, too. I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

My sister and I created most of our toys and games, and mainly fought and aggravated one another for entertainment. Again, I don't have a problem with kids being bored, and making up their own games and fun. I also believe that all that fighting (nonviolent - mainly throwing socks at each other, or hiding each other's dolls) with my sister taught me negotiation skills that help me get along with people today.

I think the overly scheduled world of kids today has its drawbacks. Kids don't have to think creatively to come up with something to do. I think it also fosters materialism in teaching kids that entertainment must be bought.

My biggest gripe would be with the noisy toys!! My god, is there anything on the market that doesn't require batteries, and make so much noise?

I don't want to have to compete with these perfect-image moms who have their kids in a gajillion activities, dress them in BabyGap, attend Gymboree, and look down upon those who don't. I think all this over-schedulization is really an attempt to boost the ego of the mom. "Look at all the activities Janie is in, look at how she excels in blah, blah, blah, look at the cute outfit I got her from Juicy Couture Baby." Do you really think baby Janie cares that she is wearing high fashion? No, but mom does.

[alison]

Holy sh*t! I had a Speak n Spell too!!! Mine was orange. To think that that was high technology back then...!

Did you have a Simon Says? It had 4 buttons on it. The machine would flash certain buttons and patterns and you'd have to do the same pattern? That was so fun. I wonder where mine is...

Oh, and one thing that is definitely improved is books! SO much more to choose from than what I remember as a kid! You can't ignore some of the old classics but there are definitely some really cute ones now!


Annie- I'm curious as to what you have as far as toys for your kids. I am trying (so hard!) to be a minimalist when it comes to toys as well but I never know how I am doing in reality Since we have moved so often in the last few years, we don't really know many people and so I really have only had one household by which to compare our toy level. Just curious Especially as we are nearing the holidays and I'm trying really hard to restrain myself from getting all of the cute things that call out to me everywhere. My 3.5yo daughter is just too darn fun to shop for right now.

[Flynn]

I'm an "go out and do stuff" mom too. I think we've been to the aquarium 9 times in 2.5 months. Every time we focus on certain things I choose or they choose. I'm flexible but we aren't just going to go someplace to run around -- unless it's a park in good weather OR I really have to get something done so a mall is a must.

We have limited toys -- but some good ones. My parents subscribe to a less is more mentality. We do too -- to a lesser extent than they do.

This Christmas the kids will get "group playthings from Santa" like a "store" or a "play kitchen" for the playroom, a few stocking stuffers, and a few (three or less) presents each from their parents. The rest will come from other relatives and when you add it all up, it will be a lot of stuff. I want them to have one "WOW" thing from us and one from Santa...but that's it from us basically. We're very into imaginative play. We have limited "noisy" toys but a few.

This year DD will get a Leap Pad for her "quiet time." We've kept the "stay in your room for at least an hour" while DS naps. It's worked out very well IMO. "Big girl toys" come out at quiet time and it's a treat to be the older big sister while DS naps. It's a win win because then I get to have some down time with NO kids. A little bit goes a long way in this regard.

I'm way off topic but I agree with Annie....how you parent is a choice. I don't feel pressure to "be" a certain way. Also, some of my kids' outfits they have are from a favorite aunt of mine who never had kids and is about the most generous person I know. I'm sure people look at me when my kids are "decked out" in their outfits...but my aunt LOVES to buy them presents and as long as it's not over the top (she gives GREAT books!) other people can think what they want.

Perception can be way of the mark of reality.

Parenting is what you make it -- then you punt when things don't go the way you thought it would.

[houseelf]

My kids' childhood look a lot like mine except they spend less time playing out in the 'hood. (There are far less kids playing outside in general, the lure of electronic toys, the safety factor, and the 7 months of winter don't help). Anyway, I feel bad about this, so when I can I get us outside as much as possible.

We go out every day. Period. Even if it is to take a drive or a hike or spend some time at the library. Mommy gets a little crazy otherwise. In the summer, we bike everywhere, spend long afternoons at the beach, and picnic under trees. So maybe my kids get a little more of me and less of their peers?

Kelly

[mommax3]

Has my kids' childhood been similar to my childhood? Um, no. DH and I are married, for one thing, and my Dad was gone by the time I was 5. My kids have never gone without milk because there wasn't enough money to buy it. My kids have never had to stay home because there wasn't enough gas in the car to make a trip. My kids do not qualify for free lunch. If my kids need clothes or shoes, we go to Target or Kohls and get whatever it is they need. I grew up with a severely handicapped sister and many of the responsibilities of caring for her, none of which my kids have experienced, even a little bit, since she died before my oldest was born. Also, I was raised in a household of women (mom and four daughters) and here, it is "my three sons" with a mom who is sometimes a little forlorn that there are no dolls or hairbows around anywhere. Totally different territory!

However.....there are some things that are similar. My kids have lots of people in their lives that love them, as did I. They are being raised with many of the same values that I was raised with. They are being raised with lots of laughter, which was always a part of my life growing up.

I really don't think I had a horrible upbringing, believe it or not. It was what it was, and I am sure I am stronger as a result. Obviously, I wouldn't choose it for my children, so there are lots of ways their childhoods are different from mine. But I hope I can give them the same fundamentals that my mom was able to give her children, because I think THOSE are the things that matter in the long run.

And btw, I don't think you have to get caught up in the parenting wars unless you choose to be......just my .02.

Interesting thread!

Sally