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Join Date: May 2024 · 03-03-2008, 07:23 AM

Re: Nursing in public

Just do it and ignore the people who give you looks. It's their issue - you're perfectly fine.

**Malpka** · 03-03-2008, 07:25 AM

Re: Nursing in public

It's their problem not yours. I have and will NIP anytime my baby needs to eat. I am always discreet, and the new faux maternity type shirts that are so popular now make it easy to keep everything covered even without a blanket.

I have seen my share of eyerolls, but the only time I had someone say something negative was another mother with her approx 5 year old girl on a plane

I was sitting in the window seat, my body turned towards the side of the plane and using a blanket. There was no way anyone could have seen a thing. She said she "shouldn't have to explain to her daughter what that lady was doing". I said "yes, God forbid you teach your kids that boobs can be used for something besides selling beer".

**Meenah** · 03-03-2008, 07:29 AM

Re: Nursing in public

Great response Rebecca!

**poky** · 03-03-2008, 08:08 AM

Re: Nursing in public

I'm thinking people looking at you, weird or otherwise, in public, is something you're just going to have to ignore/not let bother you, because it's *going* to happen (even if you weren't BF, if you're looking for it, you'll see it). If they don't say anything rude, there's really no point in letting it upset you. Just be confident that you're doing the right thing, and doing the best you can to not bother others, and you'll be fine. And keep Rebecca's comeback in mind, just in case.

**PrincessFiona** · 03-03-2008, 08:11 AM

Re: Nursing in public

Originally posted by Malpka

I said "yes, God forbid you teach your kids that boobs can be used for something besides selling beer".

OMG...That...is fabulous!

I agree with everyone else, Jane. It's their problem not yours.

Kris

**Michele** · 03-03-2008, 11:19 AM

Re: Nursing in public

I've never had anyone say anything to me....sometimes I wish they would because I sooo want to have a snappy comment.

But I guess I'm oblivious to the stares....I'm also not very discreet. I try to be, but Daegan likes to play with my shirt so he usually ends up exposing most of my breast. Ah well.

Join Date: May 2024 · 03-03-2008, 11:39 AM

Re: Nursing in public

I've had to nurse at a truck stop. How's that for everyone feeling weird? My worst experience was in Philadelphia. I was eating lunch with a relocation agent (DH was interviewing at CHoP) at a small, neighborhood restaurant. I had to NIP and there was a crotchety old lady who was very vocal about her displeasure about it and just kept saying mean things, e.g. "It's unnatural, It's disgusting, blah blah blah". I didn't want to live in Philly after that. Later, DH & I went to a restaurant that had a sign "Breastfeeding welcome" on the door. It's sad when a sign is needed for bf'ing to be accepted. Honestly, I really don't see why people can't accept it.

**Cumberland** · 03-03-2008, 12:02 PM

Re: Nursing in public

I just do it and if someone doesnt like it, they will likely get an earful from me, although I doubt as eloquently as Malpka.

**Auspicious** · 03-03-2008, 12:35 PM

Re: Nursing in public

I have to say this has been probably my biggest bugbear of new parenthood! Apparently a few decades of not exposing my nipples to daylight in front of strangers is pretty strong conditioning.

If/when someone actually says something to me I'll probably be mortified. But whaddya gonna do? Quit? Never take the kid out? :huh: Whatever. I try to be polite and not make others uncomfortable in public etc., but if they're made uncomfortable by something as simple and necessary as feeding the baby? Sorry, can't help 'em, they're just going to have to get over it. Hopefully silently.

**Rapunzel** · 03-03-2008, 12:49 PM

Re: Nursing in public

Originally posted by melfitz

I had to NIP and there was a crotchety old lady who was very vocal about her displeasure about it and just kept saying mean things, e.g. "It's unnatural, It's disgusting, blah blah blah".

Cue Rebecca's response. Good grief! I think you have to be borderline retarded to think breastfeeding is "unnatural". Seriously. And, even that is offensive to borderline retarded persons since I will bet the vast majority of them also see that breastfeeding is quite 'natural'. That woman had some serious issues.

I just got back from a series of plane trips (four total). I breastfed Charlotte on every flight and in every airport. No dirty looks. I am discreet (I've had a lot of practice

) but I know that people can tell I'm breastfeeding. Occasionally I have someone look at me and I always make it a point to return the stare (it immediately stops the staring - especially if I smile at them when I return the stare).

I agree that this is about the insecurities and sexual confusion of others. I think a mother breastfeeding her baby is a sweet scene and I wish we saw more of that behavior in public! At a restaurant a couple of years ago I walked into the restroom to find a young mother nursing her child. Personally, I was a bit yucked out that she was doing it in the bathroom (I mean, how unsanitary can you get?) but she told me she felt she *had* to. I told her that I thought she was doing a great job of being discrete in the restroom and that if she was that good at it in private that she could totally do it in public - and that I wish she would! I felt so bad for her - that she felt she had to hide away in one of the dirtiest places you can find (ie public restrooms) to do something so necessary and so good for her own child. That's just wrong.

Anyway, I'm not flashing my breasts at people in public - I think there is a happy medium. But, people who overreact based on their own issues (mostly related to sexuality I think) make me

.

**peggyfromwastate** · 03-03-2008, 01:34 PM

Re: Nursing in public

Originally posted by migirl

I don't want to start a debate here, but I'm discovering that with a newborn and a toddler I pretty much have to NIP at some point. I'm fine with it, I have no qualms about doing it at all ... but I hate how *other* people make me feel about it.

I was at a birthday party over the weekend (DH was working, of course

... so I had the two kids there with me by myself). Well, the baby got hungry and Jack was running around playing so it's not like I could excuse myself and go somewhere private to nurse the baby, so I just covered up with a blanket and let him eat. I was discreet about it, my friend told me that she couldn't even tell that I had the baby under the blanket. But there were a couple of people (one was a young mom, even!) who I felt like were staring at me and giving me weird looks.

Honestly ... if I don't feel uncomfortable about nursing my child in public, why should you? :huh:

It could be that the young mom was just seeing how to do it!

Hang in there- I had to nurse in line to go up the empire state building... I wasn't giving up my place in line, so I sat down on the floor and nursed-- this when I was 19 and already receiving the "teenage mom" nasty looks. I guess I don't even notice now... :huh:

**SuzySunshine** · 03-03-2008, 02:32 PM

Re: Nursing in public

We haven't done it much b/c I'm not comfortable with it. Not the exposure of it but me holding her, etc. So we've been practicing at home this week b/c we're leaving for CA Thursday. I realized we got a middle and aisle seat on our flight so hopefully the window person isn't disgusted or rude. :huh:

**Rapunzel** · 03-03-2008, 03:39 PM

Re: Nursing in public

Suzy, I've found that if I tell the person with the window seat that I intend to breastfeed the baby on the flight they will generally switch with my husband and I so that he can be in the middle to 'hide' any flashing and I can be up against the window where it is more private. I have yet to have a man or woman refuse this request when I politely explain ('warn'?) them of my intent to breastfeed the baby. I think most people understand that if the baby's mouth is full he/she can't cry or scream on the flight and I think that makes people relieved (the idea that the baby won't be howling through the flight).

If you meet resistance from your seat-mate I suggest you express the above to an airline attendant on the flight when you board and he/she will most certainly find someone who will trade a window seat with you.

I have yet to have this NOT work (and, I've been on tons of flights now over the years with various babies of mine).

**SuzySunshine** · 03-03-2008, 04:14 PM

Re: Nursing in public

The problem is DH is 6'4", he can't sit in a middle seat for a 4+ hour flight, we're hoping there are empty seats on board, we'll see.

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