Help, please

So Julian is one week old today. And my family is feeling it. MIL is starting to break down on me and I can tell that she is headed for burn-out. They need Mommy to get back into the swing of things. I'm just nervous. When did you take baby out? I waited 2 weeks with DD1 and DD2 was at BabiesRUs the day after I came home from the hospital.

Also, when can you start lifting "heavy things" as in DD2 who weighs 26 pounds? This would help a LOT b/c I could take her out with me and leave MIL with the baby and DD1 who is old enough to be helpful. But the doctor was describing all sorts of things that could happen to my uterus as a result of lifting that had me a little freaked out.

Or a carrier. I'm VERY anxious to get him into a baby carrier. Most of the carriers are 8 lbs min, though. He is probably going to hit 6 pounds even this weekend. He was 5.10 on Monday. I don't do slings. . .haven't ever been able to figure them out. I'm more of a Bjorn/Ergo mom but he's too little. And even if I do find one that fits him, am I terrible to take him out? We're BFing so that should count for something but. . .

Please help me.

[mommax3]

Re: Help, please

Go ahead and do a short errand (you and DD #2) and see how it goes. You will know if you are doing too much, I think. Just go on a short trip. It will do wonders for you to get out of the house. As far as taking your son out, as long as he is in his carseat, I don't think it can hurt him. I never used a carrier or a sling either. Ask your MIL if she needs to get out, too.....maybe the two of you can plan a good time for her to take a break for an hour or so. Baby steps! You can do this.....moving from 2 to 3 is overwhelming, though. At least it was for me!

[migirl]

Re: Help, please

When did you take baby out?

This time around (DS#2), I was out and about pretty much right away. I agree w/ Sally, taking him out in the car carrier should be just fine. Do whatever feels comfortable to you.

Also, when can you start lifting "heavy things" as in DD2 who weighs 26 pounds?

I've no idea w/ a vaginal delivery (I assume that's what you had?). After my c-section, my OB recommended waiting 6 weeks to lift DS#1 ... was comfortable with me waiting 4 weeks ... and I ultimately waited about 3 weeks to lift him (much to DH's chagrin ... I got all kinds of lectures about going "against doctor's orders" ... but he wasn't really around to help, now was he??! ).

I'm more of a Bjorn/Ergo mom but he's too little.

Says who? Is there a weight minimum for using either of those carriers? I've been using my Ergo with the infant insert with DS#2 pretty much since he was born (5 lb, 4 oz). He fits in it just fine (he's now 7 weeks old) and off we go.

[spotty_dog]

Re: Help, please

I carried as much as I felt comfortable with as soon as I felt comfortable with it. Eddy went to the farmer's market in a sling (walking about a half mile each way) at three days. I got my mei tai carrier when he was just shy of three weeks and that totally opened our options. I ran all kinds of errands at that point.

The more you do, the more your lochia will flow, that's one warning. So maybe take it as easy as is feasible, but especially if the little one is a carrier (and therefore people aren't leaning over and cooing in his face or something) I think you'll be fine to be in public and it might do you good to get out of the house.

[Michele]

Re: Help, please

I took Daegan out pretty soon after he came home IIRC...but kept him in a sling or wrap. Without the infant insert I'd be careful about using the Ergo /c he could fall out the sides...ut you'd probably be ablt to get the Bjorn snug enough.

[Meenah]

Re: Help, please

Will your MIL go out by herself? If so, send her out for a manicure and coffee. It will do her a world of good, but won't leave you alone for too long.

[Flynn]

Re: Help, please

You can do this.....moving from 2 to 3 is overwhelming, though. At least it was for me!

I'm not listening I'm not listening I'm not listening.

La la la la la la la la la!!!



We took DS out almost immediately. He's fine.
I healed up much faster with #2 than with #1 though AND no C section here.

Getting out even for an hour somewhere might be a good thing.

[Cumberland]

Re: Help, please

I put mine in the bjorn by day 2 with each and they were both around 6lbs. They were way down in there but it was fine.

Re: Help, please

We took our oldest DD to the dog park the day we brought her home.

[v-girl]

Re: Help, please

The first was at the mall at 3 weeks. The second spent her 5th day (we came home on her 4th day) at home -- with about 25 family members since it was Christmas. The third got a stop at Target on the way home from the hospital (he was also a 36 weeker).

We would hold the baby and cover with a blanket.

Re: Help, please

My two cents from the BTDT transition to three.

Re: the carrier, if I remember correctly the height is as much an issue with the bjorn as weight. If he is close on the height, I would give it a try. I didn't use the Ergo earlier on because I was afraid she would sink down while sleeping with that playdoh infant body and slip out the side. Might have just been paranoid on that count (I have the older Ergo model, maybe the new one is better in that regard).

Again, FWIW, I preferred to carry the baby in a carrier rather than the infant seat to make it harder for well-intentioned strangers to touch her. Besides, she hated the carseat. So, I would put DD2 (35 months at that point) in the seat of the grocery cart or stroller or something like that. Do you think your daughter would go for that arrangement? You would have to do the lifting to put her in the cart and in/out of the car, but I don't think that is too bad. Like Alison said, pay attention to any extra bleeding and let that be your guide to slow down. I tried, not sure how successfully, to do more holding and cuddling with DD2 sitting on the couch or snuggling in bed.

I also like the idea of encouraging your MIL to leave for a bit, that might really recharge her.

[Ladybug122]

Re: Help, please

Having worked (as an RN) at two different hospitals, and doing post partum discharges at both...I don't think there's a clear cut answer for heavy lifting restrictions.

The first hospital I worked at recommended for vaginal births that you avoid straining/lifting over 20lbs for 4 weeks. The hospital I work at now recommends avoiding lifting 50lbs for just 2 weeks! I think you'd be ok to lift DD2 if you have to, but I would try to avoid it as much as possible for the next couple of weeks. I know it's hard. If you start bleeding more heavily, definately cut down on the moving around and lifting...

As far as taking the baby out, I think it would be ok to take him out for short trips now, but personally, I would avoid heavy crowds for the first month - 6 weeks. Now that spring is coming (I hope), it's a little easier to get out (park, going for walks, etc.).

I can't imagine how it must be to have 3 little ones. Try (as impossible as it may seem) to take a few mintues here and there for yourself. Same for MIL. I remember feeling "cabin feverish," tired, and stressed at the begining (and that was just with one!). I remember looking so forward to taking a long hot shower....some days it seemed that was the best part of my day!

Good luck and take care! You're doing a GREAT job!

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: Help, please

We went out with #4 when he was 6 days old. The kids were definitely stir-crazy. It wasn't that bad- I think I had him in the car seat... He was little too- in the 5 lb range.

Can you go to a park or something like that?