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Potty training

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  • Potty training

    DS#1 just turned 3yo and has zero interest in using the toilet. About 6 months ago we got a potty seat for him, a bunch of books to read, etc. He seemed interested in the books and would occasionally sit on the potty (although he's never actually done anything on the toilet).

    Now ... he refuses to even sit on the toilet. We talk about it a lot and whenever I ask him if he wants to try going on the potty he yells "NO" and starts getting really mad.

    Is he just not ready?

    He definitely knows when he has to go poop (he'll sometime hide in his room), and I've seen him start and stop a stream of urine in the bathtub so I think he has some control. And he sees us go on the toilet a lot, so I think he knows what it's for. I just can't figure out how to get him to try going in the potty. I've tried incentives and bribes, and nothing like that has really worked.

    DH and our pediatrician both said to just let it go and that he'll potty-train when he's ready. Mostly I'm fine with just waiting (and waiting ... and waiting ... ), I've had so many moms tell me that they just waited until their kid was "ready" and then s/he totally potty-trained in just a few days. But then the peer pressure starts to get to me (most of his friends are either totally out of diapers or pretty close), and of course there's the fact that I'm SO TIRED of cleaning up poopy toddler diapers.

    Anyone have any tips or tricks for a kid who seems like he's just being really, really stubborn? I'm a bit, um, mess-averse ... so just letting him hang out sans diapers and seeing what happens doesn't really appeal to me.
    ~Jane

    -Wife of urology attending.
    -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

  • #2
    Re: Potty training

    I say completely drop it for at least a few weeks. It is amazing how they can change their minds about this in a short amount of time (that seems like forever while you are waiting). Generally speaking, I think the older kids get, the faster they train when it does happen. It sounds like you have given him everything he needs to do it when he is ready. I hope it is soon!

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    • #3
      Re: Potty training

      I'd drop it entirely for a few weeks, putting the potty away even. I am always amazed by how stubborn a toddler can be if they make up their mind about something.

      Then, when you do decide to go for it, I found that using real undies and skipping the pull ups was the only way to go. They need to be uncomfortable to make the transition, or at least my son did.
      Kris

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      • #4
        Re: Potty training

        About the undies, that reminds me that when dd1 trained, I let her pick out her new undies at Target. She seemed to like that.

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        • #5
          Re: Potty training

          So far, I have to say that potty-training was the source of the greatest amount of conflict between dude and I. Of course, Rick was deployed so that added to the drama, too.

          My big take-away? Exactly what everyone else said- they'll train when they're ready, no amount of pressure or reward can make them want to do it, and pulling your hair out isn't worth the stress. (and totally understanding that you're smack dab in the middle of it)

          I think for us, it was a ginormous amount of peer pressure from the other kids at crunchy school that did it.

          Jenn

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          • #6
            Re: Potty training

            Originally posted by DCJenn
            So far, I have to say that potty-training was the source of the greatest amount of conflict between dude and I. Of course, Rick was deployed so that added to the drama, too.

            My big take-away? Exactly what everyone else said- they'll train when they're ready, no amount of pressure or reward can make them want to do it, and pulling your hair out isn't worth the stress. (and totally understanding that you're smack dab in the middle of it)



            Jenn
            I agree. DD was trained in three days before she was three. DS #1 took his own sweet time and was almost 4. I tried everything and basically when he was ready, he did it.
            Flynn

            Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

            “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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