wet nurse

[HouseofWool]

My poor sister called me today in an absolute state of panic. (I rarely see (or hear) her cry.) Last night she went out with a girlfriend and my BIL put the baby to bed. Unfortunately Tate would not take a bottle. He screamed and screamed and screamed. He has taken a bottle lots of times before, but it has been a month or two.

Unfortunately, she has to go out of town next weekend for business and she is beside herself thinking of what she will do if the baby will not take a bottle. So she called and asked if I would be willing to nurse Tate and feed Sophie her stored milk next weekend if they cannot get him to take a bottle before then.

I, of course, agreed. But I had to ask what my BIL had to say. Her voice got really hard and she said he wasn't allowed to have an opinion on this. This is the same guy who flipped when I proposed pumping some milk for Tate while he was in the NICU so my sister didn't have to stress so much about it. I had to laugh at her answer because it is so practical and no-nonsense.

So - has anyone else out there nurse someone else's baby? It seems a bit odd to me, but I don't think it is that big of a deal.

Seeing as it is your sister I don't think it is a big deal at all!

I have never done it, and actually never met someone who has done it so this is a first for me But it is definitely nice of you to help your sister out.
My first would NOT take a bottle for the life of me and how I would have LOVED if there was someone to help me out!! I just don't think I ever thought of that as an option!

[spotty_dog]

One of the major network programs, I want to say it was Good Morning America, did a show on cross-nursing a few months ago.

Found it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mf156YDJSME OK, it was a year ago, LOL.

I've never known anyone close to me with a nursing baby who needed a lactating caregiver, but if I had a sister and she asked I'd say yes in a heartbeat.

Remember Salma Hayek and the African orphan? Sharing your milk is a precious gift.

[migirl]

I've never done it either, but if someone asked me (especially if it were someone close to me, like a sister!) ... I think I would.

[Thirteen]

My best friend's mother loves to tell the story of breastfeeding me, every year, at the annual Christmas party. Apparently, mom and dad were out on a date -- I wouldn't take a bottle, but she didn't think anything of it. So I guess as a healthy and well-adjusted adult, I'm thankful for the nutrition from all those years ago

I say, do it.
-A

[madeintaiwan]

I am pretty sure that DH was nursed by his mother's best friend, on more that one occasion. It was him or his brother, but one of them if not both of them were nursed while my MIL was working.

[Tenacious_D]

When DH's brother was an infant the whole family was visiting aunts and uncles down in KY and MIL had to go out for a few hours so her SIL ended up nursing both her baby and DH's brother because he got fussy. It's more rare in the states but women in other countries do it a lot more. It may seem weird at first but I imagine her baby will appreciate the warmth and connection.

[niener]

Ok this is going to show my complete lack of baby knowledge... but I had no idea you could even nurse a baby if you hadn't just had one! Although I have seen shows about women in other countries who all take on the responsibility of rearing the children, so I guess I did know that it was possible, it just never really registered. Huh...

But my ignorance aside, I think if it was between a fussy, hungry baby all weekend and helping out your stressed sister and her little one, I'd go with the later.

You can produce milk for a long time after having had a child - you would need to be feeding on a regular basis to maintain a supply but some people breast feed for extended periods of time. It's all a personal preference.
Also, I believe there is a drug that will induce lactating. So say I decided to adopt a baby from birth, I believe I could start lactating and feed my child that way. I know that with my c-sections they gave me a pill to start producing because I wasn't making milk right away!

And don't feel silly about not knowing those things... I would NEVER have known any of this had I not hide children myself!

It is true that you can induce lactation, but in this case Kris has a little nursling of her own!

Kris, if you are comfortable with it, do it. I would in a similar situation.

I do think your BILs reluctance is understandable if it is not something he has been exposed to. To some people nursing at all is weird. To many people nursing a toddler is weird. I thought so myself at one time! And maybe he feels like he should be able to handle the situation/look after his kid withouth help. But I hope he comes around and realizes that it is far better then leaving the poor little guy crying!

[HouseofWool]

Kirsty's right, the babies are just 10 weeks apart in age and my Sophie shows no interest in weaning. Apparently, Tater took a bit of a bottle last night and they will be working with him between now and then.

[niener]

Ah ok, that makes sense. Though yes, after reading this post I did a bit of researching and found out that you can indeed lactate without being pregnant! Some women can do it just by the suckling motion alone (although it's rare I think). Learn something new everyday...

Glad to hear the baby is doing a bit better with the bottle!

[GrayMatterWife]

Kris:

For whatever my thought is worth: Oh, for sweet pity's sake!

I understand that wet nursing in this day and age may be a little offputting to some people, but--to your BIL--pull it together, buddy! Assuming there would be no religious objections, you wouldn't reject a needed blood transfusion or organ donation to help your child. This is just another life-sustaining sharing of the body. Please. You are offering to share the comfort, nourishment, and humanity of your breastmilk for a child in need. It hardly constitutes an inappropriate intimacy. It's a wonderful gift to be able to give.

Your BIL would probably would rewrite the ending to "The Grapes of Wrath," too...