Sleep question

[alison]

Our 4-week (!) old baby wakes up every single hour over the course of the night and eats maybe 1 oz of formula and goes back to sleep again. During the day, she seems to have a lengthier sleep/wake cycle, usually napping for 2-3 hours and then up to feed.

Does she have her days and nights reversed? How do we get her back on track? I've read that we are supposed to keep the room bright during the day, make normal noises during the day, and then at night, keep the lights low and not stimulate the baby too much. The problem is that she seems hungry at night, but is far too drowsy to eat much. That means she wants to get up frequently and graze some more.

Getting up every single hour at night is crazy!!! Dh doesn't seem to mind, but I'm just so zonked when I have to face the day on that schedule!

Any advice? Thanks!

She definitely could have her days and nights mixed up.

I know they say to never wake a sleeping baby, but at a certain point momma needs some sleep! Since she is taking the longer naps during the day I would definitely try waking her up during the day during those longer naps and just see if this helps with her night time sleeping.

I don't have any great advice but I hope you can get her sleeping through the night soon!!

I always tried to cluster-feed before trying to lay them down for the night (if you're still bf'ing at all), and then give a little bit of formula to top them off.

Also, if she's only eating 1 oz, maybe she's not really waking b/c she's hungry. Have you tried just soothing / rocking / or a paci (if you use one - my kids were never into it)?

We have a recliner in our bedroom, and I'd basically put the baby down for the night in the bassinet / co-sleeper / crib, and when they woke, I'd nurse in the recliner and they'd spend the rest of the night sleeping on me. Not necessarily the best advice, but I got a lot more sleep that way.

[Cumberland]

Swaddling was key for my girls. They all stayed swaddled until they were 4-5 months old. Also, we tried to stick to a consistent routine from very early on- feedings at roughly the same time each day, naps usually an hour after each feeding.

I'm a huge Happiest Baby on the Block fan and we always kept the girls swaddled at night too. I also tried 'dreamfeeding' with my youngest. I would offer her a bottle when I went to bed - even if she was sleeping at the time - to 'top her off'. I didn't unswaddle or change her, just offer her another couple ounces. Sometimes she would take them, sometimes not.

[Michele]

Every baby is different but it might also be a growth spurt. With Daegan and with Kai, it seemed like every few weeks their sleep/eat patterns would get crazy....it would last about a week and then it would settle into a more regular pattern. This lasted at least the first 6 months, then it seems like it goes into an every month and a half cycle where things get crazy, then after about a week (or right when I'm about to go insane!) things smooth out again.

I also second the swaddle idea and the try something else (soothing/rocking/paci) ideas.

[alison]

We swaddle the baby at night; that helps with her not getting pissed off when she startles, but my impression is that she's not a huge fan. As soon as we swaddle her, she starts kicking like a mad woman. We re-swaddle her, and when she goes in to get her diaper changed, the girl wastes no time stretching her legs and arms out.

Most naps she's able to wriggle her arms free and put them above her head, where she seems to like them.

Jenn, she doesn't like the pacifier, but that's a good point: she might not even be hungry. Last night, dh slept with dd in the living room with her in her car seat... That seemed to work better than trying to get her back into her crib after each feeding.

How do you get the baby to eat more, and not just graze, without waking her up entirely?

[HouseofWool]

The hardest part about parenting is that there are no hard and fast rules.

My guess is that M isn't really all that hungry when she is waking at night. Rather she doesn't yet know how to settle herself down when she does rouse. I would try soothing her and laying her down when she is nearly asleep. (Laying her down can be in her crib or in her carseat - just so she doen't get into the habit of being snuggled to sleep. While it is sweet when they are little, soon they become hulking 19 pound 8 month olds.)

Then try feeding her every other awakening or every 2 hrs at night. But as others have said, there is typically a huge growth spurt right around 4 wks. When stuff like that happens, it all goes out the window and survival mode is the only option.

Hang in there Alison, it will get easier as you get to know each other better and you are more confident in your ability to read her cues.

[alison]

What? No hard and fast rules? Try telling that to a German! Dh gets bent out of shape when I fill the bottle a millimeter above or below the oz markings on the bottles. Hehe. That's enough to put a German in a tailspin!

My hunch is that M is a snuggler who needs to be with her father. I'm chopped liver.

[moonlight]

alison- is she falling alseep whie she is feeding or sometime after she has her 1oz.??

[alison]

alison- is she falling alseep whie she is feeding or sometime after she has her 1oz.??

Both, but usually during her feeding. When dh is in charge, he gives her a bottle right away. When I'm in charge, I sort of wait to see if it's just one of those sleeping wails that she sometimes has, or if it's a prolonged cry... Did that make sense? Dh doesnt have the patience for that and HATES it when I see if M is able to soothe herself or is indeed hungry.

[SuzySunshine]

We didn't swaddle A after about a week, it was obvious she didn't like it and liked to sleep with her hands above her head. We'd put her in her pj's and then a sleep sack and a hat - she was fine. I just don't think some kids like to be swaddled IMO.

[HouseofWool]

We didn't swaddle A after about a week, it was obvious she didn't like it and liked to sleep with her hands above her head. We'd put her in her pj's and then a sleep sack and a hat - she was fine. I just don't think some kids like to be swaddled IMO.

Sophie was the same way. If her hands weren't above her head she fussed like crazy! And she hated the cradle. That broke my heart a bit because it was the cradle that my grandfather built before cancer destroyed him. Every one of his great-grandchildren have slept in it.

[houseelf]

For this baby, I read the Baby Whisperer and took some friends' advice to swaddle. We had never done this before and had to kind of fight the baby the first day or so to get him to accept it.

The Baby Whisperer advocates her EASY method to get babies in a predictable routine and to stretch out feedings and sleep as long as they are able. Upon Waking, the babies Eat (E). Then they have an active period (A): swing, cuddle, baby gym, bath, etcetera. Approximately 1.5 hours later put the baby to sleep while they are still awake (S). Do so by tight swaddling and the same routine every time. I use a paci and a silky blanket by the cheek once he is swaddled. The final step is (Y) for "you time" but throwing laundry in and doing dishes doesn't strike me as qualifying for "you time".

FWIW, my BF babies have NEVER slept longer than a five hour chunk of time...even late as 11 months. Formula should help out.

Anyway, this encapsulates the Baby Whisperer's advice and it does work. (Just saved you $15!)

It does get easier to read their cues with time. Good luck.

Kelly

[rockgirl]

For my babies we used an early routine of bath,jammies, eat then bed. If they were dozing before I felt they had met their fill I would either nurse the other side or un-snap the jammies and play with their feet or the exposure to a chill usually wakes them a bit. swaddling never worked for us. I could usually get about 4-6 hours for the beginning of the night then they would wake every 2-3 hrs after. I was in bed at 7 or 8 right after the baby would go to bed so I was able to get 4-6 hrs and function the following day. It gets better as they plump up. Big hugs and hang in there. Baby will get the hang of it, in the meant time