Baby Not Getting Enough Sleep?

[ladymoreta]

Well, I think DS takes after his Mommy and Daddy, and is not looking like a great sleeper. I'm not sure if this is something to worry about, and if I can or should try to change it.

I've been using the Total Baby app to record, well, pretty much everything he does, including how much he sleeps. His average amount of sleep, including nighttime and naps, is about 9.75 hours a day for the months of April and May. (He was born 3/23.) That seems low to me. What I've read is that it should be closer to 12-16 hours. Is that so much difference that I should be concerned, or is it okay?

I put him down for naps as soon as I see him yawning or starting to get fussy, and I start trying to put him down for the night around 8:00-9:00. However, he really fights sleep when I put him down. If I put him in his bassinet slightly awake, he often fusses until he's fully awake. I can rock him to sleep, which works better, but that's a big no-no. I still do it sometimes though. At night, I turn out the lights, turn on the white noise, and minimize interaction. He usually doesn't get good sleep - more than an hour at a time - until midnight-3:00, (eats), then 4:00-6:00 or 7:00.

The past couple nights, he's been cluster feeding all night - about 1-2 hours between start to start of feeding. And his feedings take about 45 min to an hour, so needless to say neither of us has been sleeping much at night. I'm hoping this is just a growth spurt, but I'm also worried that it could be his response to not sleeping enough during the day.

Thoughts? Advice? Are there other signals besides yawning or getting fussy I should be looking for to know when to have him nap? What are some ways to get a baby to sleep without rocking them? Or am I just being a new mom and worrying over nothing?

[SuzySunshine]

At that age I think those are good signs to watch for, soon he'll start rubbing his eyes. Another thing to watch for is when he turns away from stimulation that means he's either bored or tired.

At just over a month he's definitely not ready for crying it out so rocking him to sleep is what I always did at that age. Robert is also a cat napper, he takes lots of little naps and was never a good night sleeper until about 2 weeks ago. There is usually a six week growth spurt so I'm sure that is why he's cluster feeding.

Hang in there the first 3-6 months are the hardest IMO.

[Pollyanna]

However, he really fights sleep when I put him down. If I put him in his bassinet slightly awake, he often fusses until he's fully awake. I can rock him to sleep, which works better, but that's a big no-no. I still do it sometimes though. At night, I turn out the lights, turn on the white noise, and minimize interaction.

Thoughts? Advice? Are there other signals besides yawning or getting fussy I should be looking for to know when to have him nap? What are some ways to get a baby to sleep without rocking them? Or am I just being a new mom and worrying over nothing?

He is only about 6 weeks correct? You can rock that sweet little baby all you want, it is NOT a big no-no. I rocked my babies until at least 6 months and sometimes longer, they are all fine sleepers. Infancy is fleeting, enjoy your rocking and snuggling time.

As far as the amount of time he is sleeping, if he is happy then that is the right amount of sleep for him. The times you see in books are typically averages.

You are doing fine. Is there a particular reason you do not want to rock him to sleep right now? Are you just worried he won't "learn" to sleep on his own if you do? If someone told you that I just want to let you know it's wrong, really, it is okay to rock him as much as you want

[ladymoreta]

Yeah, I am definitely not going to let him cry yet. After looking into Babywise, I did some reading about it, and agree he's way too young - and I'm really hoping I never have to do it.

[ladymoreta]

That's what I was worried about - him learning to only sleep after rocking. I do it at least once a day anyway, but I feel like I'm setting him up for having to CIO later.

[peggyfromwastate]

I rocked Josie to sleep pretty much every nap at that age. I tried to have her "learn" to fall asleep on her own when she was about 6 months, but it wasnt' worth it. After a couple of tries, I just went back to what worked. I never clocked her total sleep time- it's really hard to tell at that age, honestly. So much of the time while they are eating is also "sleep". So I'd probably stop charting that aspect of it all, unless you really enjoy doing that. If it adds more stress to your day, don't do it.

Babies need different amounts of sleep at different times in their development, and it can change day to day. And every baby is different.

Josie won't let me rock her to sleep anymore (she's 21 months, but I still try!!). She points to her crib and wants to be put in there to fall asleep on her own. I wish I could rock her to sleep because it is so very peaceful-- it's like my reward at the end of the day. But no. She has decided she prefers her blankets.

My point is not to hijack, but just to let you know that I've been there, struggling with the whole "sleep" issue for a good part of the babyhood of all the kids, and at the end of the day I've realized that the kids will eventually learn to sleep on their own, and they will eventually have bad sleep habits no matter what I do (hello adolescence). Just try to go with the flow at this stage. Your baby is so very little!

[Pollyanna]

My point is not to hijack, but just to let you know that I've been there, struggling with the whole "sleep" issue for a good part of the babyhood of all the kids, and at the end of the day I've realized that the kids will eventually learn to sleep on their own, and they will eventually have bad sleep habits no matter what I do (hello adolescence). Just try to go with the flow at this stage. Your baby is so very little!

Peggy is right on. I know it is so hard not to worry. You are doing great, believe that.

[ladymoreta]

Thank you! I just keep second guessing myself... I sit here and read stuff from so many sources. Some say if he doesn't get enough sleep, he's going to be fat and stupid, but then when I look up sleep recommendations, what works is going to make him needing me and my glider to come with him to college!

I know it's silly, but I do stress myself out too much. I just need to step away from the Google!!!

[peggyfromwastate]

but then when I look up sleep recommendations, what works is going to make him needing me and my glider to come with him to college!

I know it's silly, but I do stress myself out too much. I just need to step away from the Google!!!

Not silly-- Normal! I remember when the twinis were babies and a woman in her 70s told me she had twins, too. I asked her if they slept thru the night yet! I was kidding, of course, because her twins were in their 40s (so probably they didn't sleep thru the night, lol) but the point was that at that time I was so fixated on sleep schedules that I was pretty much blind to the obvious-- kids do grow up.

Never fear, even though you want to go to college with your kids, they won't let you tag along.

[MrsK]

I haven't read everyone's responses to please excuse me if I'm being redundant. Go ahead and rock him to sleep. He's at that delicious age where you cannot spoil him so enjoy it! I had discussed sleep training with a sleep psychiatrist here. He told me not to worry about it until the baby is 6 months and he even endorsed rocking to sleep, nursing to sleep, and all the cuddles you'd like. He'll get the hang of it.

As for whether he is getting enough sleep, we've always had difficulty getting BabyK to nap. I discussed it with my peditrician and he said that some people are just not wired to nap. As long as the baby is growing and sleeping at night and not getting sick, the peditrician said he was not concerned about it.

[Tenacious_D]

Rocking him to sleep is nothing! Little E slept on me after nursing for hours on end. DH would go to class in the morning and be back 5 hours later and I might have moved once. He slept best on me during the day for naps (I rarely put him down) and did fine at night and now he is mr. independant curls up in his crib with his blankie and couldn't be happier.

[Urowife]

You've gotten good advice - don't worry about setting up bad habits, go ahead and rock him to sleep. I was blessed with a terrible sleeper, so if you ever want to commiserate, feel free to PM me. I've been there.

[ladymoreta]

So good to hear these! I really needed this after freaking myself out last night. DS is happily sleeping in my arms right now, and I just love it so much! I appreciate it, and hope you'll all be here for me during my next panic attack...

Peggy - I hadn't thought about the time he dozes while he eats. Since he eats for about 45 min to an hour at a time, those little catnaps probably do add up to a significant amount. That makes so much sense!

[ladymoreta]

Haha thanks Urowife! I'm also a terrible sleeper - I can remember when i was little lying awake and watching my digital clock go 12:34 and some nights 1:23 - and my bedtime was 9:00! I think he'll make a great teenager. If I left it up to him, he'd stay up all night then sleep until 1:00 or 2:00 in the afternoon!

[Michele]

Re: Baby Not Getting Enough Sleep?

I know I only have 2 but mine are so different when it comes to sleep that I feel like I know something. Which is nothing. Daegan is gonna fight sleep unless I lay with him. Kai is gonna fight me unless I leave him to sleep alone.

I'm starting to think that parenting is really justfinding what works for you and your child that day. And then refiguring it out the next. And as long as you love your child and aren't using the closet as a babysitter, you are probably doing ok.


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