Babysitter question

[Urowife]

I just met our neighbors who have 15-yr-old and 13-yr-old daughters. This family babysat for our landlords kids, so they are well recommended. I'm looking to have one of them babysit for our 17-month-old DD one afternoon a week for a couple of hours. My original thought was just to have the 15-yr-old babysit, but their mom mentioned in her voicemail (we're playing phone tag) that they could switch off every other week. I'm just a little concerned that 13 is a little young to watch a small toddler.

Many times I anticipate actually staying in the house - hiding in our spare room doing projects. Maybe the younger one could watch her while I'm in the house still? The girls do seem mature, but I'm still a little concerned.

Thoughts?

[SoonerTexan]

Haha, well at 13 I babysat for a family that had a 7 month old (who was a preemie and refused to be put down so I had to hold her the entire time), a 2 year old, a 4 year old, and a 6 year old. None of them were particularly easy and all of them hated to go to bed. Getting them all to sleep (literally wrestling the 2 year old into the bed while holding the baby) is still seriously one of the proudest moments of my life.

Then again...I was the oldest of 5, and that babysitting job sucked.

[Pollyanna]

I would let the 13 year old act as a mother's helper so you are there if needed. Most 13 year olds (even 15 year olds) have no idea how to handle a baby. Lots of them treat them like baby dolls (with the exception of SoonerTexan). I would monitor both girls for a while before I would even leave baby with the 15 year old (but I'm a nut when it comes to sitters for my children). And if you are not comfortable with the 13 year old just tell the mother she is too young for you. I imagine she is doing a little refereeing between her daughters to make sure they both get booked for babysitting. In the end it only matters what you feel comfortable with, not what works best for the neighbor girls.

Definitely go with your gut feeling on these things. I'd hire the 13yo for when you're at home. I babysat when I was that young. Looking back, I think the people who hired me were crazy, even though nothing bad happened.

ETA - You might even do a trial run with the 15yo while you're at home!

[Deebs]

I babysat extensively at 13, and am still striving to find a babysitter that was like me. I have to say - I was awesome. I was also more responsible than my older sister (3 years my senior). But, the family I sat for started using me as a mother's helper when I was 12 and really got to know me. I had a mother's helper over the summer who is 12, and in the next six months I will start using her as a sitter for 1 of the kids at a time. You can tell a lot by being home while she's sitting. I'd definitely start with that.

[houseelf]

FWIW, the super, uber responsbile 13 y.o. on our street only babysits our one year old when he is sleeping after 7 p.m. in his crib AND her mom is home a couple houses down. My one year old is darling, but he it T-R-O-U-B-L-E. This way the sitter can concentrate on the 6 y.o. and generally just be around in case the 10 year old uses his best 10-year-old boy judgment and tries to cook EasyMac in the microwave without adding water and sets it on fire. You know, just hypothetically speaking. :eyeroll:

[Urowife]

Thanks everyone! You all kinda confirmed what I was thinking. By the way, what do you pay a mother's helper?

I will be picking the two hours a day when DD won't be sleeping (she only falls asleep with me) or eating a meal, just playing. But, she still can be somewhat challenging because she gets into everything!

[MrsK]

Sorry for the late reply. . . I was a mother's helper at 12 and babysat other people's children at 13. However, at 13 I was still not allowed to babysit my own brothers. They were 11 and 9 then and my folks thought that I wouldn't have any authority to enforce rules with my brothers. I suppose that they would have given me grief if I told them to take baths and go to bed and perhaps the three of us would have torn the house down but it was very embarassing for me when the hired teenaged babysitters showed up.

[Deebs]

We pay our mother's helper $5/ hour. She typically is with 2 of the 3 kids. I try to schedule her when the baby is napping or DS is napping because I feel like all three is way too much (my kids are at really hard ages, though).

[v-girl]

If she had younger siblings, then I wouldn't hesitate. My 12 year old babysits her 3 year old monkey brother. He's wild, but she's fine with him. She has friends her age who do not have younger siblings for practice. I don't think I'd trust them with my 3 year old, or a younger child.

I did babysit at that age, but my mom & sister would take me to babysitting jobs with them so I had a lot of practice by the time I was 10. Yes, I babysat at 10.

[houseelf]

I suppose that they would have given me grief if I told them to take baths and go to bed and perhaps the three of us would have torn the house down but it was very embarassing for me when the hired teenaged babysitters showed up.

This is kind of where I am with the ten year old. It embarrasses him that a 13 y.o. who is two grades ahead of him "babysits" but I just don't trust his judgment right now. He's o.k. by himself during daylight when I do a 30 minute run somewhere, but add siblings, a prolonged period of time, and darkness and he just isn't ready. I'll take embarassment over potential catastrophe anyday.

[HouseofWool]

FWIW - my normal sitter just graduated from high school. But, none of the ones I normally use are available right now and I am using a 13 yo to watch 7 yo DS and 20 month old DD. Her mom will be 6 minutes away as will I, so if there is a crisis, we can be there quickly.

[SoonerTexan]

I used to babysit our neighbor's baby when I was a junior in hs...when the freshman boy was at home too. The mom just didn't trust him.

10 year old uses his best 10-year-old boy judgment and tries to cook EasyMac in the microwave without adding water and sets it on fire.

Haha! My brother did something similar at 10--tried to melt butter for popcorn in the microwave in a metal pan. I was babysitting and told him no popcorn...he didn't listen. 8 year old brother tried to tell him metal cant go in the microwave--he said "No--it's plastic that cant go in"

10 minutes later we had a microwave fire and the handle of the pot was charred off.

[scrub-jay]

I babysat our neighbors, but I took a babysitting course at a local hospital (I think it was a 9-5 training on a Sat. and Sun.). I remember it being very helpful and I learned to avoid popcorn while babysitting as it was the most common choked-on food during babysitting shifts!

Maybe suggest that the 13 y/o take a course (or both of them)? They really could learn a lot - and they usually teach infant/child First Aid and CPR.

Good luck!

[houseelf]

Hijack---My brother and I were latch key kids. Every day after school we would make a snack. One day I remember calling mom at work one day and telling her, "Now don't get excited, but the oven is on fire".