Curveball

[alison]

It looks like he's on track! I think my dd had a very short third nap around noon time at Bean's age. 30-45 minutes.

[Thirteen]

He fell asleep for 20 min., and woke up crying. Loudly, DH goes in, talking to him and picks him up. Noooooooo!
Oh well... We tried again, and no dice. We'll try again tomorrow.

[Thirteen]

We took it to the mattresses tonight. Started our bedtime routine at 6pm (so there would be plenty of time to get to bed at a decent hour), and slogged it out until about 5 minutes ago.
He did so well, until about 6:20, and then fell apart hardcore: screaming in my face, screaming in the swing, wouldn't suck his thumb to self-soothe, wouldn't comfort nurse. It was no bueno -- it came on suddenly, and I knew it was a pain cry, so I grabbed the Motrin and then held his screaming, wriggly body and tried to comfort him. He settled down around 7:15, and we cuddled until he was in a dreamy state. I carried him to bed, laid him down, and he rolled over and proceeded to cry. (So. Close.)
I patted him for another 5 minutes, then called a mental health time-out, and walked out of the room to: hide in the dark in my bed and let him cry for a bit. (I give him 4-5 minutes, to see if he can self-soothe: if not, I go get him). He wimpered for another 5 minutes, and crashed. I watched on the monitor, on mute because I am such a great parent, and went in search of an adult beverage from the fridge.
I know it sounds terrible, but... you guys, my ears are ringing from the screaming. I don't have any more fingernails to bite. My hands look so bad. :/
</PansyMom>

[Thirteen]

We took it to the mattresses tonight. Started our bedtime routine at 6pm (so there would be plenty of time to get to bed at a decent hour), and slogged it out until about 5 minutes ago.
He did so well, until about 6:20, and then fell apart hardcore: screaming in my face, screaming in the swing, wouldn't suck his thumb to self-soothe, wouldn't comfort nurse. It was no bueno -- it came on suddenly, and I knew it was a pain cry, so I grabbed the Motrin and then held his screaming, wriggly body and tried to comfort him. He settled down around 7:15, and we cuddled until he was in a dreamy state. I carried him to bed, laid him down, and he rolled over and proceeded to cry. (So. Close.)
I patted him for another 5 minutes, then called a mental health time-out, and walked out of the room to: hide in the dark in my bed and let him cry for a bit. (I give him 4-5 minutes, to see if he can self-soothe: if not, I go get him). He wimpered for another 5 minutes, and crashed. I watched on the monitor, on mute because I am such a great parent, and went in search of an adult beverage from the fridge.
I know drinking sounds terrible, but... you guys, my ears are ringing from the screaming. I don't have any more fingernails to bite. My hands look so bad. :/
</PansyMom>

[v-girl]

It's tough. I would have done the same. When you can't take the screaming, it's time to walk away so you can regain your composure. You did well.

[ladymoreta]

I think you did great! And it's not bad at all - I have several friends whose kids won't go to sleep with them in there. They need that couple of minutes to fuss/unwind, then they go right to sleep. If he had needed you right then, he wouldn't have gone to sleep. I hope he gives you a good nights sleep tonight!

[Deebs]

I don't know if it makes you feel better, but my youngest only cried her self to sleep from 7 or 8 months until 14 months. I would leave and set a timer for 10 min to keep myself from going in. There were only a handful of times that she wasn't asleep before the timer went off and most times it was within a couple minutes. The same child just turned two and now loves to go to bed at night.

[Thirteen]

Night waking at 3am - not bad.
7:09 - awake. Decided I didn't want to go in and get him until 7:30 ("official waking time," I've decided), and he was happy.
10:30-11:30 - fighting him down for a nap. Clean dipe, nursing him down, and reading to him.
11:30-12:30 - Nap #1.
12:30 - 1:50 - Wakeful time - kind of fussy (because Nap #1 was not long enough).
2:00-2:45 - Nap #2. Quick and dirty, but better than nothing.
2:45-6:00 - Wakeful time.
6:00-7:01 - Bath, nursing, bedtime hijinx. I let him cry for almost 10 minutes, and right before I went in, he stopped.

We added a sound machine (on my old iPhone: "White Noise app") to the mix today - I'm hoping he will associate it with quiet time and relax.

[Thirteen]

On top of the teething, I forgot to add that he's pretty much outgrown his swing (which became his go-to for relaxation for quite some time).
There are so many changes he's facing right now, it's hard on him. Poor little man!

[v-girl]

Poor little dude (and mommy).

[Thirteen]

He had one night waking at 4:30am - again, not bad. Nursed and went back down.
7:40 - awake! Hooray!
Nap#1 - it took an hour (!) to go through the routine and get him down, but he slept for 2 hrs, so I can't really complain.
Nap#2 - ugh. 20 minutes. I blame the teething.

Bedtime was a disaster - I didn't follow through. DH has been working nights all week, and both DS and I seem to be on the edge of an allergy attack/small cold thing? Not sure which, I just know it involves scratchy throats, hoarse voices, and post-nasal drip on my part. Meh.
The whole afternoon was getting him prepared to sleep by 7pm. At 6pm, I was too tired to do anything other than put him in his swing (I cheated, and I liked it, okay?) and let him swing, where he was QUIET, for an hour. He fell asleep in the swing, I twilight fed him, and put him in his bed.
The swing is Switzerland: he thinks I'm letting him play, and I know he's getting sleepy. No crying, no drama. I can't keep using it, though. He's outgrowing it so very quickly, and he needs to learn how to put himself all the way down.
We worked more at naptime on positive association with his room (which wasn't an issue until I decided to bootcamp him on all things sleep-related), and it's working out well. The sound machine is always the same, and he likes it. I stay in there for a while, smile and pat/stroke his back to calm him down. He reaches up for me sometimes when he cries. Breaks. my. heart.

[BonBon]

This parenting business is not easy, but you're doing great! (Sorry, I don't have any helpful advice other than what you've already got...) 3 of my 4 weren't nappers after ~6 months or so. It's rough.

[scrub-jay]

There is something to be said for survival my dear! It sounds like the two of you are making progress. I hope you both feel better soon!

[Thirteen]

Daylight Savings Time... Napped for an hour total. He's been yawning all day -- I'm hoping we can power through to bedtime, and the routine.
I suffered from a "sneaky hate spiral" on my parenting capabilities today, but I'm trying to remind myself I'm a good Mom.
I hate those guilt-ridden, inadequate thoughts that gang up on me sometimes. Blech!
Good Mom, Good Mom.


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[ladymoreta]

I suffered from a "sneaky hate spiral" on my parenting capabilities today, but I'm trying to remind myself I'm a good Mom.

You are a great Mom!!! It is so hard being the mommy of a bad sleeper. So many people tend to equate good sleeping with good parenting, and the guilt sneaks up on you. Trust me - I struggled with that for over a year. It's not that you're doing anything wrong. Anything you try can take up to a month to start showing progress, and then sometimes it isn't what your baby needed, so it doesn't work, and you feel like you've wasted all that time. It's hard, but he'll get there!