Minor But Annoying New "Trick"...

[ladymoreta]

Okay, I know in the grand scheme of things, this is nothing, but I'd really appreciate some advice. DS has started "falling" when we're walking and holding hands. He'll be calmly walking beside me, then just drops down on the ground. If I walk away, he'll get up and usually follow or catch up to me, but sometimes he'll run off somewhere else. If I'm in a safe place, like a store or the gym, I'll do that, but I can't in parking lots or when we're out for a walk. It doesn't seem like much of a consequence anyway, since he just giggles and gets to run free.

I have some luck with telling him since he can't walk like a big boy, I have to carry him, but this is getting really difficult when he arches and kicks with my 38 week baby belly. And I have no idea what I'll do after DD is born and I'm either wearing her or carrying the carseat.

Gah, this is mainly just a vent, but I'd you've figured out a way to stop a toddler from doing this, I'd appreciate suggestions!

I remember this well. My general rule for the kids is they get to choose what I hold -- their hand or their ear. It sounds barberic, but it keeps them attached to my hand after one time w/the ear. I know he's only 1, but my first 2 were so close together that I had no choice but to be super, super strict about it.

[Momo]

I always kept DS in stroller. Once I realized,when he was 5.5 mos.old, that I was expecting again, I knew then that it was best not to allow him the walking option! Be careful because getting the "genie back in the bottle" or in your case stroller, might be hard after baby comes! The double stroller is a huge MUST

[scrub-jay]

DD loves this too. UGH! I ask her to "march" and that becomes a little more fun. I look ridiculous in parking lots (think marching cadence), but w/e... keeps my kid in line. Don't judge me. Good luck!!

[Pollyanna]

#4 used to do this at about that age. She would fall down in the middle of the school cross-walk, parking lots, etc. I told her that if she can't walk and hold my hand then she would be carried. If she would not be still while being carried she would be in the stroller. She ended up being stuck in a stroller for about two months. Every place we went she was put in the stroller. Every time she asked "why" I would calmly explain that until she could walk safely holding my hand she would be in the stroller. Eventually we went from the stroller to being carried. When she got good at that she was allowed to walk while holding my hand. Be kind, calm, and firm. Don't walk away because it becomes a game. Explain the plan and follow through until he gets it, just don't expect him to "get it" over night. I know it's hard with a new baby on the way, just make sure you have a great double stroller.

[v-girl]

I was *that* mom. K was put on a leash (monkey backpack with a long tail for you to hold.

[Mrs. MD, Esq.]

I think the leashes are a great idea...especially in crowded areas!

[ladymoreta]

Haha! I LOLed at the ear rule! I may start with that and see if he gets it. If not, I do have a double stroller. Guess I'll get really familiar with that. Good to know about the walking away - that's what a friend of mine recommended, but I didn't think about it becoming a game. Makes sense, given his response to it.

[peggyfromwastate]

When my toddlers did that, I said "if you can't walk nicely, I'm carrying you and you won't like it" and I carried them like a sack of potatoes-- over my shoulder. It's not fun for them. So usually they walk along now.

[Michele]

Yep, hold my hand or I hold you.

Double stroller, or start wearing him on your back in an Ergo, you can double babywear if you need too.

[samssugarmomma]

Another in the "hold my hand or I hold you camp". DD3 is going through this right now - she's 20 months - and it is so aggravating. She always picks the dirtiest spot to "fall". Eww! And with winter snow and sluch coming - yuck! I'm hoping that this phase goes away quickly.

I used a leash with number 1 when she did this but it didn't really help since the issue was the "falling" - not running away. I've found the "hold my hand or be carried" stance to be failry effective.

[ladymoreta]

I just wanted to update and say that the "hand or ear" choice has been working brilliantly! I love it!!! It's pretty cute, too... DS will often grab his own ear while holding my hand, and sometimes when he knows I'm about to make him choose, he starts saying "ear" and holding it. He never fought me while I was holding it, so it wasn't ever really a punishment, just an amusing alternative for him.


Laurie

[MrsK]

I'm finding that "choices" work really well with my 2yo. Things like "are changing your diaper on the table or on the floor" "do you want to take a nap now or after we read one book". It makes him feel like he is in control but either way he gets his diaper changed and takes a nap.

Meanwhile, his latest "trick"... I have him climb in the car on the passenger side when I'm putting K2 in the passenger side infant seat so my toddler will be confined in the car. Then I walk around to the driver's side to buckle my toddler in his seat. But as soon as I open the door, he scrambles into the front seat and starts rummaging around. He weighs more than 30lbs so it's not easy to drag him back to his car seat. He thinks this is hilarious.

[v-girl]

Meanwhile, his latest "trick"... I have him climb in the car on the passenger side when I'm putting K2 in the passenger side infant seat so my toddler will be confined in the car. Then I walk around to the driver's side to buckle my toddler in his seat. But as soon as I open the door, he scrambles into the front seat and starts rummaging around. He weighs more than 30lbs so it's not easy to drag him back to his car seat. He thinks this is hilarious.

K does this when I unbuckle him and let him get out on his own. He's the youngest so I don't have a smaller child to tend to, but I usually just go with a firm "Get out if the car/in your seat or I'm taking away your trains for the rest of the day." He's 4 though so he gets that. I don't know if BabyK would "get" a consequence that is not immediate. I've only had to follow through once or twice though.

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