Allowance Amount

[peggyfromwastate]

And for perspective-- my dd11 was telling me today on our "special family outing" (her choice-- the mall. Ugh) about her friend on the swim team who gets $120 a week in allowance.

Must have rich dawktor parents or something like that!!!

She buys clothes at justice "every weekend".

We go to the mall to window shop mostly (and dd11 had a return/gift card to spend.)

It's all relative.

I do find the mandatory trip to the bank before shopping for stuff is helpful!! And my ds8 has over $600 in the bank--- he was unsure about what it means to have money in a bank and we have had a lot of good discussions about how banks work, and credit cards, and mortgages, etc. he used to be worried that his money was just gone at the bank-- but he held onto his deposit slips like gold. So it's been a process for him, but he's starting to get it!!

[spotty_dog]

Today my kids were fighting over who got to scoop the cat litter. Score! But DH seems to think $2/week is too much for kindergarten. Thank goodness he is home for a couple of days and we can discuss it rationally, maybe tomorrow.

[MrsK]

And for perspective-- my dd11 was telling me today on our "special family outing" (her choice-- the mall. Ugh) about her friend on the swim team who gets $120 a week in allowance.

Must have rich dawktor parents or something like that!!!

She buys clothes at justice "every weekend".

. . .

That's way too much even for a teen. I don't think I even had that much pocket money in college. If kids have too much money, not only will they fail to appreciate working for money, they can get into trouble. I wouldn't want my kids to have enough money to buy cigarettes, pot, beer, etc.

I just remembered a girl I knew in high school who got her first checking account with an ATM card. She didn't understand how the ATM card work and she thought it just distributed "free money". Boy, was she surprised when she emptied her account in under a week.

[SuzySunshine]

So we still haven't started this yet b/c DH and I haven't had time to discuss it but I was discussing it with one of my girlfriends this morning. She is a big proponent of Love & Logic and went and say Dr. Fay yesterday - anyway the tip that someone gave her there was the following for allowance/chores.

They get a set amount of money based on age - it has nothing to do with how many chores they do but they have a chore chart and on allowance day if mom had to do their chores that has been noted on the chart. So say they get $2/week, but as allowances are handed out mom says "but it looks like mom made your bed on 3 days so that costs 75 cents or whatever so they only get $1.25. So they learn that everything has a cost - does that make sense? I thought that was interesting way to do it...like I said still deciding but thought that would raise some conversation.

[Pollyanna]

So we still haven't started this yet b/c DH and I haven't had time to discuss it but I was discussing it with one of my girlfriends this morning. She is a big proponent of Love & Logic and went and say Dr. Fay yesterday - anyway the tip that someone gave her there was the following for allowance/chores.

They get a set amount of money based on age - it has nothing to do with how many chores they do but they have a chore chart and on allowance day if mom had to do their chores that has been noted on the chart. So say they get $2/week, but as allowances are handed out mom says "but it looks like mom made your bed on 3 days so that costs 75 cents or whatever so they only get $1.25. So they learn that everything has a cost - does that make sense? I thought that was interesting way to do it...like I said still deciding but thought that would raise some conversation.

Eh, it may be logical but I don't like to run a family with a gains and losses kind of feel. That methodology strikes me as very cold and someone is always keeping score. Sometimes mom may make your bed because you were up late doing homework and she wanted to help. Sometimes your older sib may walk the dog for you because you have a headache. I don't like the idea of those things being boiled down to cost. How about we help each other out because we are in a family and love each other.

[GreyhoundsRUs]

I think it's great that you're investigating different ways of doing allowances. It's such a case-by-case thing - what are you going to stick with, and what will your kids best respond to You're doing your due diligence, for sure!

[MrsK]

Eh, it may be logical but I don't like to run a family with a gains and losses kind of feel. That methodology strikes me as very cold and someone is always keeping score. Sometimes mom may make your bed because you were up late doing homework and she wanted to help. Sometimes your older sib may walk the dog for you because you have a headache. I don't like the idea of those things being boiled down to cost. How about we help each other out because we are in a family and love each other.

This was my thought too. I don't like the idea of docking their pay. And it would be just a matter of time before K1 came to the logical conclusion that he could pay his brother to do his chores. (This would happen in a heartbeat. The day after K2 (then 13mo) learned to put his own shoes away, K1 (then 2y7m) persuaded K2 to put his shoes away too.

I've been re-thinking my original position because K1 has suddenly been talking about buying and selling things. Like saying that he wants his friends to buy him an octopus costume or that he earned $14 selling soup to elephants and wants to take us all out for corndogs. Although his understanding of numbers and currency is poor, he seems to understand that there is some sort of exchange of cash for goods. DrK wants to hold off until 1st grade for allowances but we may institute our own household currency system here. Maybe replace the stickers with play money or something he can accumulate and exchange for bigger rewards.

[ladymoreta]

LOL MrsK, that was my sister and I! She asked every week if she could do my chores for my allowance. I didn't care that much for buying stuff, and if I had something I'd rather do that week, I often let her. Mom was totally fine with it, but I'm sure she was amused.

We aren't there yet with our kids, but what my parents did worked well. I got $2 a week at first. At some point it went up to $3. Mom also gave me $7 a week for school lunches starting in middle school, but I could use it in the cafeteria, at the concession stand, or keep it if I chose not to eat at school. Around late middle school, she transitioned from an allowance to paid chores. My sister and I divided up the housework into two categories that took about equal time, and we switched each week. For that, we each got $20 a week, but we were able to do each others' if we agreed on it ahead of time. It sounds like a lot, but it went fast on things for school, gas money, pizza at late extracurricular meetings, etc.

[MDPhDWife]

Haha, DD8 has been hiring DD11 to do her chores for years! I see it as a valuable lesson actually. Think about it, as adults we often hire housekeepers or other service providers to do things for us. DD11 enjoys the extra cash and DD8 really hates doing chores so she considers it money well spent to outsource the task. It also teaches valuable lessons in negotiation. It's very interesting to hear the negotiations that take place between my girls.

[peggyfromwastate]

I think there is something to be said about this--- a chores exchange. I am going to think of a way for them to trade their nightly chores--- could help with the ones who really "hate" to set the table vs clear the table vs take out trash... Interesting...

[Flynn]

Our two older kids get $2.75 a week. $2.00 goes to spending, .25 goes to donate and .50 goes to savings. DH wanted them to save and donate he and I do in real life, not 1/3 or 1/4 of our income so that's how we do it. (anal much?)

They have chores and responsibilities but they like money so much they do them without prompting. Additionally all we have to say is 15 minutes less on Mindcraft and they would lick the floor clean if we asked.

[alison]

In our family, we just did what we were told--trash, loading/unloading dishwasher, washing rice (Asian family!), and didn't get an allowance. I never got one as a kid. We were simply expected to just do the task in exchange having a place to sleep at night. .

When it came to wanting to buy things, my brother and I would get the stuff we wanted from our parents, within reason. We weren't well off, and we kids knew that, so we just felt there were things that were simply out of reach for us.

[peggyfromwastate]

Yes-- as a kid I didn't get allowance but was able to negotiate with my mom for doing chores for money. I never had much money. I wasn't allowed to get a job either because of my crazy sports schedule and our busy summer plans that made it impossible to find a regular job...

My friends and I were all in the same boat for the most part.