Freaking out about new daycare...

[diggitydot]

As someone who has had daycare provider's license revoked, I think you're 100% correct to make her first day will be her last with this gal. Not that this woman would intentionally harm or put your kid in danger, she just sounds like she doesn't have enough sense to foresee the potential and inherent danger in situations that she SHOULD see.

[Pollyanna]

Ummm, "very sweet" in this case translates into naive and irresponsible. I wouldn't feel bad at all, you will find the best situation for your children. I will keep my fingers crossed for you. Childcare mojo and prayers sent!

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

As someone who has had daycare provider's license revoked, I think you're 100% correct to make her first day will be her last with this gal. Not that this woman would intentionally harm or put your kid in danger, she just sounds like she doesn't have enough sense to foresee the potential and inherent danger in situations that she SHOULD see.

I think this is spot on. I think she's just naive which is interesting because she's a parent herself. I don't know what she'd do in a fire, etc. with that many kids. I'm going to see if DH's aunt can pick her up when nap is over. She definitely wouldn't hurt anyone and her references were quite good (although that's obviously a biased sample), I just don't want my child in that much chaos. Minimally because I don't want her to learn that she should be screaming at the top of her lungs to get attention or climbing TVs...

Yeah, feeling bad doesn't mean I'm not going to seek other arrangements.

[GrayMatterWife]

My son had a nanny his first year of life who also watched her own daughter (2-1/2) at the same time. It was a TERRIFIC experience for him. We loved her. And our DD#3 seems to absolutely love being with her three big sibs. She finds them riveting. A multi-kid environment can really work.

But, that being said, I would probably be VERY concerned about kids climbing on a TV. That just sounds unsafe. Lots of kids are great if...there is control, organization and proper supervision and stimulation. And fewer electronics used as a jungle gym.

[SoonerTexan]

Are there any moms that might be interested. One day could be attractive to them for some extra money without a lot of commitment

[Pollyanna]

Bottom line, we all just need to live closer to each other. Childcare would be beautifully handled in the commune

[scrub-jay]

Bottom line, we all just need to live closer to each other. Childcare would be beautifully handled in the commune

IMSN commune.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Bottom line, we all just need to live closer to each other. Childcare would be beautifully handled in the commune

Word. That would be a dream.

I'm so over this.

[SoonerTexan]

Bottom line, we all just need to live closer to each other. Childcare would be beautifully handled in the commune

Lived it. It is

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

I have her home safe and sound. She was fine but she's not going back.

The kids were still incredibly loud when I got there (the other kids were gone, it was only hers). And her 2 year old escaped out of the door while I was there and ran to the street. So while I realize that can happen to anyone, I saw enough of her kids behaviors that I don't want my kid repeating (yelling when speaking to me, jumping off the TV, running to the street) that she isn't going back. In addition to the concern about numbers.

I'm relieved she's home. And this weekend ill start looking again.

[Michele]

Another point of view:

Daegan was kicked out of daycare for biting. The director set me up with a former employee who was now watching a few kids in her home. The day I interviewed her, Daegan fell on a treadmill in her living room and tore a nice chunk of skin from his finger. Her house was FULL of tchotchkes and she watched 2-3 other kids and her own two school agers. (This was before Kai.) I was desperate and really had no other options. It ended up totally fine! And I still think of her fondly.

No she didn't put block on them when they played outside. And no she didn't go over any fire plans or emergency plans with me either. Yes she fed my kids Cheetos and fake sugar more than I would have. And yes she had to drive them a few times and I *gasp* didn't scrutinize her car seat set ups. If I would have focused on those things I would have gone insane. Certifiably insane.

In the end, my boys are fine. And she was there for me when I needed her MANY times. Fed my kids dinner and bathed them when I had emergencies at work and watched D with zero notice when I had to take K to the hospital to name a few.

This time of year, kids are wild. Summer is over and it's a transition time. Just sayin' if you came to my house now, you'd see a different set of kids than in October or March.

I'm just throwing this out there if you get stuck and need to use her again. Certainly trust your gut!!!! But sometimes a second look is worth it.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Thanks Michele! I always appreciate another perspective.

I can definitely see what you're saying. However there is such a thing as a first impression. Not getting emergency contact info and having so many kids on the first day isn't a great way to start in my opinion.

[PrincessFiona]

Go with your gut.

You have to be comfortable!

Michele, when my kids' 1st grade teacher came over to the house for the first time, Aidan (then 2)shocked her by leaping off of the sofa multiple times. It was quite an impression. I'll never forget her turning to me and saying "I'm not having that one "(in her 1st grade class). She did and they adored each other

My kids and I have wild days too. I'm a lot more comfortable with chaos

kris

[alotofyarn]

Bottom line, we all just need to live closer to each other. Childcare would be beautifully handled in the commune

My good friend from med school and I totally had this all worked out - she wanted to stay at home, I needed someone to watch my (then hypothetical, future) baby. Of course we didn't match together. I'm still nervous about daycare, but at least it's only 2 blocks from my office.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

I just feel like your own kids and their interaction with their siblings is different. I mean, I don't think moms who have 5-6 kids at home are irresponsible. But I think a daycare provider who has that many is a bit naive about the level of care/safety/supervision she can provide to children not her own. I guess I have less of a problem if I'm "neglecting" my kid because of their (theoretical) sibling than if she's being neglected because of some other child unrelated to her. Plus, I know she'll learn to yell and run out of the house - I'm not completely naive - I'd just like her to figure that out on her own, not because some older child taught her.