Bittersweet

[ladymoreta]

Last night, I folded up DD's cloth diapers after washing them. I had a little sad thinking about how it's my last time to fold up diapers. It made me think of a blog I read awhile back about "lasts" (as opposed to firsts, or milestones). It seems so strange to me that, while we're still using pull ups for her while we're out on long errands and use pull ups for both kids overnight, we're leaving the diapering phase behind. With DS, I always knew the phase was coming back around for DD, but now it's just a strange feeling that I'm leaving these milestones behind.

How about you guys? What "lasts" that have been the hardest? Any that you sailed past without realizing?

[houseelf]

Egads, I can only answer this with a bit of background.

I talked a looong time deciding whether to have number three, so I went through a few "lasts" with my second. So I've done some of the emotional passages of "last moments" twice. Since I know I tend to be tenderhearted about the passage of time, when I decided to go for number three, I gave myself a pep talk that his life would not be monument to the waning of my motherhood. I want to be able to muster as much grace and happiness as he steps over each passageway of development. Still, I love my kids like crazy and it goes too fast. When I slip into one of these moments, I tell myself that I've been blessed with a longer motherhood season than most, this is not the last child's life I will be intimately involved in, and I try very hard to just be present in the moment lest longing/sadness rob me even of it. I'm not always successful, but that is my internal dialogue. it is a dance between not denying the emotions of grief and being both present and practical.

Nonetheless, the *hardest* milestones for me have been weaning from breastfeeding (which all occurred freakishly around the one year mark for every single kid even though I could have continued), the last day of preschool, the first day of kindergarten, and weeklong summercamp. I have a feeling this fall will be excruciating as my first born starts high school. That's just too crazy for me to wrap my head around. Heck, I can barely type that out with out a physiological response. Gah. Don't listen to me. I haven't mastered this stuff at ALL. LOL.

[v-girl]

Hugs!


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[MrsK]

Lambie is only 2 months old and I am acutely aware of this. I boxed up her and K1's preemie clothing for a preemie charity already and I've been selling K2's outgrown clothing.

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[mommax3]

Weaning my last one was difficult, especially because it happened sooner than I wanted it to (recurrent mastitis).

Getting rid of clothes that snapped at the crotch...baby clothes, I guess I mean.

The last time playground equipment was a fun way to spend an hour or so.

The last time bringing home the latest kid release on dvd/blu-ray and hearing "yay"!

The last time my youngest wanted to hold my hand when we were walking together, just because. He kept it up longer than his older brothers did, so the "last" time (last year) was not as soon as I thought it would be, and I was grateful every time he grabbed my hand until he stopped.

The last time they say "mom" in their high voice, before it changes (for boys, obviously).

The last time they need you to give them a ride somewhere.

The last time they look up to you, instead of the other way around.

[spaz]

Ok, I'm sorry but I will never ever be sentimental about diapers. I hope I never have to change any every again.. ( I didn't really care for the baby stage. I much prefer my teenagers!!!!!) It was strange not to take a child to mother's day out. ( I had at least one of my children there for 12 years) It just felt strange not to go there on Wednesdays and Fridays. Then I had the 4 or 5 years with no time to myself once that was gone. My oldest is actually MUCH more affectionate now that he is away at college. Whenever he is home he gives me several hugs a day. ( I think he really misses me. He is such a mamma's boy!) I miss hearing him play the piano. I sort of miss hearing him talk about sports and other things but we talk once a week and so that is fine.

Taking him to college was fine and will be with my middle one. I think I will have a much harder time when the boys get married and I am no longer the most important girl in their life. ( Neither one has been interested in dating yet.) I don't know. I like them more the older they get. I like the person they are becoming. I don't really miss the younger years. I guess I'm strange.

[MrsK]

Weaning my last one was difficult, especially because it happened sooner than I wanted it to (recurrent mastitis).

Getting rid of clothes that snapped at the crotch...baby clothes, I guess I mean.

The last time playground equipment was a fun way to spend an hour or so.

The last time bringing home the latest kid release on dvd/blu-ray and hearing "yay"!

The last time my youngest wanted to hold my hand when we were walking together, just because. He kept it up longer than his older brothers did, so the "last" time (last year) was not as soon as I thought it would be, and I was grateful every time he grabbed my hand until he stopped.

The last time they say "mom" in their high voice, before it changes (for boys, obviously).

The last time they need you to give them a ride somewhere.

The last time they look up to you, instead of the other way around.

OMG, you made me cry. Just when the boys were driving me crazy. ..

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[ladymoreta]

Ok, I'm sorry but I will never ever be sentimental about diapers. I hope I never have to change any every again.. ( I didn't really care for the baby stage. I much prefer my teenagers!!!!!)

Fair enough! I am also pretty happy to be leaving the baby phase. I hope I have a similar experience with liking my kids more as they become older. It seems like my style. I am loving toddlerhood/preschooler phase so much more than when they were babies, and I was one to celebrate when they started to crawl and walk.

OMG, you made me cry. Just when the boys were driving me crazy. ..

Haha this! I teared up a little, too!

[mommax3]

Bittersweet

Sorry for the tear-jerker post! We spent the weekend with my oldest (freshman in college) for his 19th birthday...I guess I was feeling nostalgic! For what it's worth, I wasn't a huge fan of the baby stage, either. However, the sweetness of those days can look pretty good in the rearview mirror! No matter where you are in the process, try to find things you enjoy, and hold on to the memories of those little things.

ETA: MrsK, my boys *still* drive me crazy! Actually, I think I arrived at crazy a long time ago and am well on my way to the destination after that!

[MrsK]

ETA: MrsK, my boys *still* drive me crazy! Actually, I think I arrived at crazy a long time ago and am well on my way to the destination after that!

They were doing it on purpose yesterday. And just when I was about to flip out, they cluster around to throw their arms around my waist and look up at me with those big puppy eyes of theirs.

[mommax3]

I cursed myself by posting earlier....we discovered today that my youngest is taller than me (at age 12). I am 5'7. Bittersweet indeed!

[moonlight]

I will come back to this and post more. I wanted to add the 3rd bday was really hard. In my mind the baby stage is truly over by that point. With each "last" I cried and cried because like Kelly I thought DD would be a only child.