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I hate potty training

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  • I hate potty training

    This is not working. We've had false start after false start for 6 months. Being insanely busy and working doesn't help, but I just don't think the kid gets it. Over and over we sit on the potty and she will pee/poop 10 minutes after getting off. Or less. Often on the floor.

    We talk about it all the time, we've tried pull ups, real underwear, bribes, treats, books, potty themed TV shows. She's not necessarily against it, but she doesn't seem all that excited about it either. She is more than happy to walk around in pee or poop filled diapers and is even resisting us changing them. Yet she will often wake up from overnight or naps dry. She's dry a lot of the day.

    She's almost in 5T clothes and size 6 diapers really aren't cutting it anymore. She has leaks all the time.

    This is an articulate child. She gets the concept. She either just doesn't want to do it or truly cannot figure out when she is peeing/pooping until it happens.

    We took her out to lunch and gave her lemonade today--always a guaranteed pee bomb. Then we came home and sat on the potty with the kindle for 40 minutes. Twice she said she was doing it, but it was a false alarm. Then she got tired of sitting there and said she was done as I was nursing the baby in her room (right across from the bathroom open door). She walked over to her bookshelf and immediately peed. I admit I lost it a little.

    What the hell do I try next?
    Married to a newly minted Pediatric Rad, momma to a sweet girl and a bunch of (mostly) cute boy monsters.




  • #2
    you don't try anything. Leave her in diapers, put away the potty chair, and don't worry about it for a month or two. She will get it eventually.
    Kris

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    • #3
      I'm with Kris.

      I'm sorry. I know you're eager to be rid of the diapers. Unfortunately, they are ready when they are ready. It's impossible to push them. I went through a similar experience with Andrew and it was an exercise in frustration. He just wasn't ready, but I didn't want to see it. Potty training dragged on forever until finally at some point it clicked for him. It doesn't sound like N is ready yet. Give her more time. You'll get there.

      Kris
      ~Mom of 5, married to an ID doc
      ~A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss

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      • #4
        Originally posted by HouseofWool View Post
        you don't try anything. Leave her in diapers, put away the potty chair, and don't worry about it for a month or two. She will get it eventually.
        This, exactly this. Children potty train when they are ready, not a second sooner.
        Tara
        Married 20 years to MD/PhD in year 3 of MFM fellowship. SAHM to five wonderful children (#6 due in August), a sweet GSD named Bella, a black lab named Toby, and 1 guinea pig.

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        • #5
          And trust me - a few years ago I was right there when dealing with S. She was stubborn (I have no idea where she gets that) and it took forever to click. But it did and she is fine. Now, night training? Bwahahaha - I have given up and we will be buying pull ups forever.
          Kris

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          • #6
            I was ranting to my mom about it and she said I didn't train til 3. She is my daughter in so many ways...this makes me feel better about it. I'm still annoyed at the diapers, but at least I can avoid the "run through Target to get to a potty" for a little longer?

            Actually, I had a ton of anxiety relating to using the bathroom until mid-elementary school. I think my mom even took me to a Urologist at one point. It all resolved itself, but I hope pushing her didn't cause any issues.
            Married to a newly minted Pediatric Rad, momma to a sweet girl and a bunch of (mostly) cute boy monsters.



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            • #7
              Our kiddos were all 3 and a half plus if it makes you feel any better.
              Tara
              Married 20 years to MD/PhD in year 3 of MFM fellowship. SAHM to five wonderful children (#6 due in August), a sweet GSD named Bella, a black lab named Toby, and 1 guinea pig.

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              • #8
                I agree with no pushing her.

                I did want to throw out one anecdote though. My friend here had a son with the exact same attitude. Happy to pee/poop anywhere, just did.not.care. Two weeks ago he found a Buzz Lightyear toy he DESPERATELY wanted and she bought it and put it on a high shelf. She told him if he wanted it, he had to pee/poop in the potty. He did it starting the next day. He was the same as N, completely articulate, definitely knew what was going on, just didn't have any motivation. They went a couple of days with Buzz reminding him to stay dry during the day and he earned his Buzz after 5 days. So, I definitely don't think it's a big deal but if you wanted to try something because you're so confident that she actually understands, that's an option.
                Married to a Urology Attending! (that is an understated exclamation point)
                Mama to C (Jan 2012), D (Nov 2013), and R (April 2016). Consulting and homeschooling are my day jobs.

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                • #9
                  How old is she? If she isn't almost 5, then I wouldn't worry about it. My oldest was 4 1/2. The others were 3 something. Thankfully my memory is fuzzy about that time because I hated it so much. I was so glad to be through with diapers. My least favorite stage. I LOVE teenagers so much more. Give me a 17 year old boy any day over a baby!!! Or even worse, a toddler!!!

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                  • #10
                    She'll be 3 in Dec. I don't think she is having the accidents on purpose...I just think she has no idea "it's coming"
                    Married to a newly minted Pediatric Rad, momma to a sweet girl and a bunch of (mostly) cute boy monsters.



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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by spaz View Post
                      Or even worse, a toddler!!!
                      Pre-schoolers are tiny terrorists...
                      Kris

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                      • #12
                        FWIW, one of mine trained at almost 4. The other? Before the age of 2. It's a crapshoot. (Pun intended).
                        Angie
                        Gyn-Onc fellowship survivor - 10 years out of the training years; reluctant suburbanite
                        Mom to DS (18) and DD (15) (and many many pets)

                        "Where are we going - and what am I doing in this handbasket?"

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                        • #13
                          I wouldn't sweat it. She's young and the introduction of a new sibling always leads to toileting setbacks. I'm right there with you on the 5t pull ups. K2 blows his out every day. He's older than N and weighs 40 lbs. Then K1 has been having potty accidents since Lambie was born so I've effectively got three in diapers. Still, the pediatrician says it's all completely normal.

                          Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
                          Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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                          • #14
                            All of my kidswe re just shy of 3' and then it happened quickly. Something just clicks on the later side of two.

                            I remember reading a post where someone called potty training the seventh circle of hell. so true!
                            -Ladybug

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                            • #15
                              Oh yeah...too early for her. I'm sorry. Just stop for now.

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