I look like an idiot!

[Phoebe]

My 6 yr old finally went back to school today. She has a field trip to an apple orchard. It is 60 degrees. She refused my urging to wear appropriate clothing. She is dressed in a skirt, sleeveless shirt and hair in her face. She refused to wear a coat. At the bus stop, my friend asked me if I remembered they had a field trip today.

The class was leaving before I could get there with a coat so I had the school secretary let her borrow a sweatshirt. I am not winning mom-of-the-year by letting my child go to school dressed like that and evenmore, I am tired of the power struggles with my child and she is only 6! She was complaining that she always has to do what I say. I told her that was her job. Like she doesn't have choices? The teen years may ruin me!

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: I look like an idiot!

Kate was like that. She's no walk in the park now, but she's stronger with other kids and *fingers crossed* will hopefully be better at dealing with major peer pressure issues.

Anyway, at that age she and I tried to set clothes out in advance, and to make special arrangements for "special outings" like the field trip. If she had more time to consider her outfit, it was less stressful for her and for me in the morning. But she went to school in some seriously wacky outfits. Seriously. I just "picked my battles" carefully. I often felt like a total idiot b/c of what she was wearing though. So I empathize with you!!!

[MDPhDWife]

Re: I look like an idiot!

Both my DD's are drama queens about how they dress and how their hair is done so I can emphathize with you about the power struggle. One day when I was feeling like an idiot for the ridiculous outfit DD was wearing, I took a step back & thought, how she dresses is not a reflection of me. I want her to know I accept her and her wacky style and that she doesn't have to change just so that I feel better about it.

As for the inappropriate dress for the weather, I too pick my battles, but I tell her she has choices. I've said "some kids like to be comfortable when they're outside, so they'll wear (fill in the blank) when it's cold/hot out." If she makes a bad choice and complains later to me about it, I'll remind her that it was her decision and maybe she'll make a better choice next time. It sucks when people are giving you the crooked eye though and you question your parenting.

I did something similar with the daily shoe battle. Everyday the girls come home and toss off their shoes and of course in the morning it's drama because they can't find them and we're running late. So I took DD to daycare once with just socks and said "some kids like to wear shoes to school, so they put them away where they can find them". Of course I told the teacher what I was doing, so they wouldn't report me. So far the shoe issue got better, but we're still working on it.