Private School- Worth it?

Next year I'll have 2 in school (second grade and kindergarten). The school district is so-so, but the actual school is within walking distance to my house which is very convenient. There is a private school here in the city that's kind of the place to go if you are from an affluent family. Apparently the education is really great. They have financial aid applications as well, as there's no way we could afford to send our kids there without a needs-based scholarship. (Of course, not everyone gets a scholarship who qualifies because the funds are limited.) The application proces to even attend the school is a huge PITA with interviews, evaluations and so forth. Then there is the financial aid application, but I wouldn't mind that so much. You don't know if your kid is going to get financial aid until after they've been accepted, so you must go through the whole application process to even find out. Additionally, it's 75 dollars per kid to even apply to the school.

I guess my question is, do you think it really makes a difference? It's not religious, so it makes no difference in that respect. I don't know whether or not it would be a waste of my time to even fill it out and pay the money. I hate being poor. When DH was working as an engineer we were able to send our kids to a private Montessori preschool but now it's like we practically qualify for food stamps (not actually, but still).

[diggitydot]

If it's worth it to you, do it.

All of our kids have attended public schools in three different states/districts and while each one has been significantly different than the others, all of our kids have done well in them. We currently live in a district that is not the best, but the kids all attend very good schools (some of the best) with in the district and are doing exceedingly well. I'm a firm believer that education is what you make of it.

I mentally compare our kids' educational experiences with our neighbors' kids. Most of the neighborhood kids attend private schools, some parochial and some not. We aren't in an affluent neighborhood, at all. Private schools are just super common in this area. So far, our kids have access to better resources, more competitive classes, and more varied extra-curricular activities than all of the privately schooled kids. Our next-door peeps' (and some of my favorite neighbors, ever) kids attend the most expensive/elite private schools in the area. Both of their kids are missing basic skills like writing an outline, basic research projects, writing book reports, etc. These aren't elementary-aged kids. Her oldest just started high school and has no clue how to do a perfunctory book report. Nice kids with professional parents, but an apparently incomplete education from the most prestigious private schools in the county.

Do whatever works best for your family.

[Mrs. MD, Esq.]

I am a big believer that school is what you make of it -- private or public. My DH and I have this argument all the time. I went to public all my life and he went to private catholic schools. It seems like we got comparable educations, but for both of us, a lot of what we learned was self-taught/interest based. There are so many ways to cut corners if you want or to really supplement your education, that I truly don't think that private school is better than public school. In many ways, I actually think I have a better foundation than my husband in certain subjects (and vice versa). I want our kids to go to public school (unless the local schools are truly atrocious) and he wants them to go to private. We'll see!

That being said, if you think that this private school will give your children more opportunities for a better education, then there's no harm in applying. However, do keep in mind that it's possible that only one or two of your children will get in...which certainly could work, but it's something to consider.

Good luck!

[SuzySunshine]

I agree with diggity you have to decide what is best for your family.

We are going to our first post training job in July. My daughter still has one year of preschool before school but we already have a plan for our two possible locations. At one we will move to an area with excellent public schools and pay the higher property taxes because of the schools and because it is equidistant between the two hospitals DH will work at. At the 2nd location we will most likely put the kids in catholic schools through grade school but then send them to the public high school, the public high schools are good - we could send them all the way through and once we visit we might but the religious education is also important to us.

As someone who used to work at a private preschool that was next to impossible to get into find a way to set yourself apart if you do want to apply.

[MDPhDWife]

My BFF and I were just having a discussion about this exact topic this week! She has two kids that are very close in age to mine, a 4th grader and a 2nd grader. Up until this year they had always attended a private school which her MIL was on the Board of Directors. After her son was diagnosed with ADHD last year and continued to have behavior problems, she decided to give public school a try in hopes that there would be more support and resources available to him. Of course this was much to her MIL's dismay and it caused some tension/drama. Now that we're halfway through the school year I asked her how it was going and she couldn't be happier. She said within the first couple weeks of school the teacher set up a meeting with her because as it turns out her son is severly behind and the teacher wanted to forge a plan to catch him up. She said the public school has done so much more for her son than private school (with a family member as a board member!) ever did, especially when it came to communication. She was so moved she wrote an extensive thank you to the entire school district. I should point out that the public school district where we live is notoriously bad so this actually says a lot. So my reponse to your question would be it depends on the school itself, regardless of public vs. private.

[Pollyanna]

I agree with everyone else that school is what you make it for the most part. We have lots of Catholic k-8 here but most are painfully behind and lack resources. They just don't have the money to keep up and can't charge an outrageous tuition because families would be unable to attend. Plus, many Catholic k-8 (across the country) are big on busy work type of homework which I hate. So while we would have liked the religious component for our children it just didn't make sense to send them to one of the local Catholic schools. We decided that for us we will do k-8 public and then a Catholic high school. Our two oldest are in high school and have been really happy with this plan, even though they knew very few kids going into high school. High school is a hard time for kids and it's nice for them to be at a place where they can practice/discuss their faith and feel supported. It's just a completely different environment from the public high schools that is hard to describe.

I would say that it never hurts to apply, you might be really pleased with the private school and it may be the best fit for your kiddos. At the same time, if it doesn't work for you the neighborhood school is still an option. Good luck!!

[SoonerTexan]

I went to public all my life and he went to private catholic schools.

That's us. I got the better education, especially for high school, hands down. He agrees. I could walk to my beautiful, brand new, highly ranked school and had my choice of AP classes, etc. We had 17 National Merit Scholars that year. He had to drive 45 min into the ghetto every day to a school that was disgusting (I went with him once...it truly was that bad) and had relatively limited class options. They had 2 National Merit Scholars that year (not that it means much, but just a comparison). It wasn't even ADA compliant--there was a poor freshman there one year who was horribly sick (she died the next year) and had to be helped up a flight of stairs to her classes every day. That drove DH nuts, considering how much $$$ they dumped into their athletic facilities.

Of course, it totally depends on the private school and the school district. My parents moved to their city with schools at the top of their wish list. In other areas of DFW, public schools aren't much of an option.

I'd still consider Catholic K-8 for our children, though.

[Ladybug]

We're thrilled with our small private school. Even if/when we move to a better neighborhood we will most likely keep our kids enrolled here. I think the biggest perk is the small class size and individual attention, but not all private schools maintain those lower ratios. We also have a incredible arts program, lunch is amazingly healthy and provided for all students (no lunches from home) and there is physical activity each day (gym, ice skating, swimming, modern dance) in addition to daily recess time. I'm also a big believer in single-gender primary education. The boys are taught in much more physical, hands-on method and the girls have a a strong science and math program that is tailored to their specific learning needs. Academically our primary and middle schools are a year advanced. I think things even out more in HS with AP courses. I have seen middle school students struggle when switching to our school because there is a big jump from public school academically. It's something to consider and ask around when looking at long term education plans. I think our school is worth every penny but I don't think all private schools exceed public school's offerings. Oh, and our school is definitely not funded or professionally staffed to handle all learning disabilities. We do have many students with learning disabilites that work closely and successfully with our learning center staff, but there are always students whose needs exceed our abilities and we recommend parents enrolling them in a public school to access their resources. Getting parents to believe that is difficult though.

I'm always a big proponent of keeping all your options open. I would apply and see what happens. I'm sure you'll gain a greater knowledge of exactly what you want for your children's education, and greater self knowledge is never a waste of time or money.

Good luck!

[spotty_dog]

Our choice is pretty simple here. Our local public school is decent, the only private options are expensive and/or religious and/or a long way away and/or affiliated with education models I'm not totally behind (Waldorf). We'll send the kids to public school, and if that doesn't meet their needs, I haven't closed the door on the homeschool option.

Your husband is MS-1...remember that you will probably be moving in just a few years, so I dunno. I wouldn't agonize too hard about these few elementary years you're looking at.

[DCJenn]

My son attends the local public school- it's a magnet Spanish Duel Language school and it goes from pre-k through 8th grade. The school district is pretty terrible (but getting better) as it's the inner city district but the school itself is great.

High school remains a question- kind of depends on what's going on when he gets there and we have 6 more years to wait it out.

Apply - it can't hurt to have options.

J.

[SoonerTexan]

Crunchy School is public? Cool!

[Pollyanna]

Ladybug, your school sounds awesome!!!

[GrayMatterWife]

My son attends an "exclusive" private school here in town. I hate the fact that everyone else thinks it is exclusive. We are not "exclusive" country club-type people, and I don't like being type-cast by strangers when they find out where my son attends.

That being said, it is worth EVERY.SINGLE.PENNY. At least, in our situation. We live in a horrible (I mean, REALLY bad) school district. Public school was not really an option, even the magnet. And, the school he attends--while definitely pricey--is a loving environment with a very LOW student-teacher ratio. He loves it, he's really blossoming, there is great teacher-parent communication, and I sleep easy at night regarding his education.

It is worth far, far more to me than a house. If I could not afford to send him there and live in our house (the condo we just sold), I would have sold the condo sooner and degraded housing.

Crunchy School is public? Cool!

crunch school was preschool, I believe.

[Chrisada]

Definitely depends on where you live. Our public schools are as good as the exclusive private schools here. Pretty much everyone in my community goes to public. You move here for the schools. DH's parents are in Chicago and spend alot, I mean alot, of money for private school because even the elementary magnet schools were not up to their level.