Bicycles

[MrsK]

So, K1 is begging for a bike this summer. I know, that was fast. Getting K1 a bike probably means getting one for K2 also. The boys will be 5.5 and 4 in June. I'm worried about teaching them bike safety. I don't ride a bike and I'll be on my own with the two of them and Lambie most of the summer. K2 thinks its funny to run from me and the boys scatter from time to time. When they are excited, K1's auditory delay kicks in and he literally doesn't hear. I'm worried that they'll stray too far, dart in front of cars, or in K1's case, not hear cars coming or misjudge his distance from a car. I'm already working on things like teaching them not to open the front door, dart out of the house, chase the ice cream truck without an adult, cross the street to the neighbors houses without looking. We have lakes and whatnot in the neighborhood and when spring started, the boys thought that bolting out of the house and making us chase them was hilarious. I also caught K1 trying to convince a friend to climb on our roof. I guess that I don't think they are ready to be responsible on bikes but I don't think I can delay it much longer without being over-protective. I do want to make sure I've established the safety rules befor giving them bikes though. Any thoughts?

[Pollyanna]

If you can't get them to listen to things like you described above then bike rules don't so much matter. Can you start an expectation chart? When you consistently do these things you may have a bike? Or is there a place in your backyard for them to ride so cars, etc are not an issue?

[MrsK]

We have some space under a covered deck where they can ride a little but not much. There is also a cul-de-sac at the end of our block. The neighborhood kids are playing ball and riding bikes in the cul-de-sac all the time, including kids who will be in school with K1. I want him to fit in with the neighborhood kids.

The family across the street has a kid K1's age who appears to have ADHD (not diagnosed but the family is working on it) and a daughter K2's age who is deaf in one ear. They also have a 2yo and are expecting again in August. So, similar to us. Maybe I should hit them up to tag team this with me? They are protective but not as much as I am.

[PrincessFiona]

Frankly, they're not ready until they can follow the rules. Getting them bikes now (unless they only ride in the backyard) could be dangerous. If they need to wait a year, so be it.

Kris


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[Pollyanna]

Frankly, they're not ready until they can follow the rules. Getting them bikes now (unless they only ride in the backyard) could be dangerous. If they need to wait a year, so be it.

Kris


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Exactly this. I know you know this MrsK. They just don't seem ready. I would also note that you may not be in such a hurry for him to fit in with the neighborhood kids until you really know you want him playing with those particular boys. Don't rush their time table in an effort to fit with other kids.

If you really want them to have bikes I would tell them they may only ride in the backyard until they follow the rules 100% of the time and you might be able to use it as a bride for K2 with the potty thing. No bike until you no longer have accidents.

You are not being overprotective in the least, I think you're being a thoughtful good mama.

If it makes you feel better, our 6.5 year old still does not have a bike. We just could not trust that she would stop at the street 100% of the time and we don't have room in our backyard so she has had to wait. She'll likely not be able to ride a two wheeler until she is 7 but you know what? She'll survive.

[fluffhead]

Not to minimize the dangers, but I generally lay a ladder at the end of my driveway so the three littler ones can ride around w/o me worrying about them straying into the street. (I've had visitors come very close to destroying their front ends when I forget to pick up the ladder, but that's another story...) Occasionally I'll take them to a park or a closed road to ride.

[MrsK]

The difficulty is that when they had bike day at K1's school, he was literally the only kid who didn't have his own bicycle. The teachers were asking me if he knew how to ride as it is one of the gross motor/vestibular milestones they are tracking and I had no idea whether he could do it. We ended up borrowing a bicycle from the school for bike day and the teachers determined that he can ride very capably. Since then, he's been begging for a bicycle and for a batman helmet. (Also a good idea since he has a turquoise glitter-covered helmet with kitty cat ears that he picked out when he got his tricycle for his third birthday. The neighborhood kids could be taunting him at school for that for the next 12 years.) He really just wants to fit in with the other kids -- which we encourage in light of his social delays. He's finally playing well with other boys, joining the pack so to speak and I don't want my anxiety to hamper his development -- physically, socially, or otherwise. He *might* be ready and it could be that *I* am not ready.

I'm kind of leaning toward getting a bike for K1 but not for K2. (This might be rough in light of the fact that K2 has a summer birthday. Yeah, happy birthday kid. Your brother gets a bike and you don't.) I definitely don't think K2 is mature enough; he's incorrigible these days and cannot even be trusted to stay close in the grocery store. I can make it a "when you are 5yo" or "when you start kindergarten" thing. Also, without K2 winding him up, K1 is pretty well behaved. So, I'm thinking one on a bike and one on a trike, or even one at a time if K1 wants to give K2 a turn, is more manageable.

I like the idea of putting a ladder or other type of barrier at the end of the drive way. I put a bench out in front of the house this weekend so I would have a place to sit and watch him. Maybe a "children playing" sign too? And in the beginning just letting him on the driveway when DrK or I are there and the baby is napping in the house (so I don't have to worry about leaving her in the event I need to chase him)? Eventually, in the coming years, I want him to be playing kickball in the cul-de-sac and chasing down the ice cream truck with the neighborhood kids (assuming that they are not hoodlums which they do not appear to be). I'm trying to balance his developmental and social needs, opportunities for him to learn responsibility and self control, with keeping him safe.

[Pollyanna]

Sounds like you've come up with a good plan!! The glittery helmet is cracking me up, ha!