breaking nervous habits

[TigerLily]

Hey guys!
I think of it here often. Hard to jump back in without being super awkward. I know this is the place with the wealth of knowledge and advice that I need though.
My 7 year old, (who was probably closer to 4 last time I posted about her) has all of these nervous habits. It's always something. For the last few months it's obsessively chewing on her finger and then wiping her finger on the side of her mouth so it's red and swollen and irritated and sometimes almost scabbed over. We tape her finger somedays, which helps the finger but she still chews on it. I feel like I'm constantly saying FINGER at her to get her to stop, but the minute she takes it out, it goes right back in again.
I feel like I need to get to the root of the issue, anxiety? Or is this just a normal thing? someone help! I don't want to be too hard on her and I can certainly be controlling...but her poor little face....

[HouseofWool]

My first guess would be anxiety. Would a fidget of some kind work as a substitute?

[TigerLily]

I should try that. Do you think I need to do anything about the anxiety? Or is that something that kids go through?

[Meenah]

Have you talked to her Pediatrician?

[samssugarmomma]

One of mine has some similar issues - though she has been diagnosed with a sensory processing issue, anxiety, and ADD. Mine probably has more issues than yours, but maybe so of this could help?

One of her things is chewing on anything and everything - her fingernails, her hair, bandaids, clothes, etc. We went through one school year where she ate pencils - including the metal part that holds the eraser. We did a few months of Occupational Therapy and that helped. One of the best things that helped was writing Social Stories -
Social stories are short descriptions of a particular situation, event or activity, which include specific information about what to expect in that situation and why.

She and her OT would write stories about why she was chewing on things, why it was not good for her, and what she could do instead. They would take specific examples from her week like "I chewed on the crayon in art class because I was feeling ....... She would also illustrate the stories - I can't remember why that was supposed to be helpful. We also got her some "chewing necklaces" - which looks like old school telephone cords and are a "safe" alternative as well as pencil toppers - so taking the chewing and redirecting it onto an approved / safe object.

It also helped to add meds for anxiety and ADD.

I found these fidget cubes that have helped with the chewing and the restless hands - https://www.amazon.com/Generic-Fidge...ds=fidget+cube. This link is for a knock off - I've purchased it and it isn't as good as the original. If you are really interested I can dig through my emails and find the original maker. The "real" ones are around $25ish.

Mine tends to move on to a new issue every school year - which is super fun! - and now it's lying and sneaking food. Good times.


For seeking help - we started with our pediatrician and she gave us a referral to OT and to a psychologist. We did therapy for a few months but I couldn't take playing the Feelings game anymore and there was a natural break with the end of the school year and we stopped going. *insert embarrassed mom face* We also consulted a child psychiatrist that specializes in adopted kids because we wanted to rule out some things and make sure we were treating the right stuff.

I hope that wasn't too random and if you have any questions I'd be happy to answer them.
Kate

[TigerLily]

Thanks Kate! I should talk to her pediatrician. I don't want to make a mountain out of a mole hill, but it seems like that is the best next step. She's always been an anxious kid. When she was little, like 2, I remember if I rearranged the furniture or moved things around I would have to prepare her before I brought her in. Moving was a huge ordeal. She is super smart but always feels under a ton of pressure at school to be perfect and get good grades.

[PrincessFiona]

It sounds like she could benefit from a therapist. Maybe some habit reversal training. I'd suggest that she needs to become aware of the behavior herself. You could talk with her about how she feels before engaging in the behaviors. Turn it into a game that every time she does the behavior she has to tell you a secret word (like pickle or whatever). You can keep an hourly behavior chart and reward her if it doesn't happen or come up with other goals to reduce. Once she can identify the behavior on her own, give her an alternative behavior, like a fidget. A therapist to work with these behaviors and anxiety might help.


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