new wave of books needed

[Flynn]

So DD will be TEN in October. I have found my usual methods of parenting aren't as effective and need some recs for new helpful books.

I like the "Love and Logic" series and will be picking up the one on teens (I know she's ten but I NEED some new material!).

What are some other suggestions?

Thanks in advance!

[weeniegeniewife]

My DD is 10.5 so we are in the same boat. What types of parenting books are you specifically looking for? Communication, discipline, puberty, etc? I'll try and see if I can help.

[Flynn]

We've had GREAT luck with American Girl "Care and Keeping" with regard to puberty.

I'm looking for ways to set boundaries with her in a way where there is less emotion/frustration and more straightforward consequences. So I'm looking for books on communication AND discipline.

[Phoebe]

I'm following this with thread with anticipation since I have a sassy/wonderful girl on the verge of being 11 years old. She thinks she should not have rules or a bedtime and I don't listen to her because although I hear her, she is not getting what she wants.

[Pollyanna]

Ahhh yes, this is the period affectionately known as the "ten year old talk" in our home. Every child in our home has pushed the boundaries at this age. The "talk" is then repeated around age 12. While are parenting is gentle, we have high expectations and do not let the kiddos get away with things or attitude just because they are going through a "stage". Sometimes and for some kids that means being on them every single day. It is exhausting but well worth the effort. You want a strong relationship as well as clearly defined boundaries by the time your child hits high school. It will make the high school years easier to navigate. And the time starts now.
I don't have a specific parenting book to recommend but we LOVE the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. I also recommend finding lots of ways to positively reenforce your child's good behavior at this time (and sometimes you'll really have to search,lol). Try to have more deposits than withdrawals from your relationship.

[Flynn]

Try to have more deposits than withdrawals from your relationship.

I LOVE this! Thanks!



I just bought a book "Raising Hapiness 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and happier Parents" by Christine Carter (this sites and uses some Gottman principles)

So far I like it. It talks about investing in your marriage, how to tweak motivating talks with your kids to get the most out of them and how to cultivate happiness.

[scrub-jay]

I LOVE this! Thanks!



I just bought a book "Raising Hapiness 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and happier Parents" by Christine Carter (this sites and uses some Gottman principles)

So far I like it. It talks about investing in your marriage, how to tweak motivating talks with your kids to get the most out of them and how to cultivate happiness.

I love this book and the UC Berkeley Greater Good Science Center (where she works). I like many of the principles she outlines, they are evidence-based and now that I'm reading Nurture Shock, I'm seeing all the same points(and research) reappear.

[houseelf]

Dr. Laura Berman _Talking to your kids about sex
Rabbi Scmuley Boteach- 10 conversations you need to have with your kids
Vicki Courtney- 5 conversations you must have with your daughter

The last two are religion based (Jewish and Evangelical Christian) so YMMV. Nonetheless, the underlying morality/life lessons are great food for thought

[Pollyanna]

Oh yes, totally forgot about Scmuley's book! Loved that one!!

[Flynn]

Dr. Laura Berman _Talking to your kids about sex
Rabbi Scmuley Boteach- 10 conversations you need to have with your kids
Vicki Courtney- 5 conversations you must have with your daughter

The last two are religion based (Jewish and Evangelical Christian) so YMMV. Nonetheless, the underlying morality/life lessons are great food for thought

Thank you thank you! I can't wait to dig in and let the bonding begin!!!!

[spotty_dog]

I don't have a kiddo in this age range, but my favorite parenting author does have a teens book, "Get Out of My Life! But first, will you drive me and Cheryl to the mall?" Oh, and it looks like he has a 2011 one as well, "I'd Listen to my Parents if They'd Just Shut Up." His approach to parenting is authoritative and compassionate, and largely steers away from reward/punishment behavior-oriented dichotomies, without ever being permissive or indulgent. His "Secret of Parenting" was the first book (after reading a good many, I am an obsessive researcher of all things that interest me) that I deemed useful enough to purchase for my home library after checking it out from the public library.

There are several chapters of Nurture Shock that are also pretty eye-opening about this stage.

(Um, in hindsight, strike that. I am pretty sure that Anthony Wolf will not suit your parenting style, from what little I know of it. Sorry not to be more helpful! )