My house looks awful

[diggitydot]

My perspective on the kids having chores is 1.) they need to know how to do these things, and, 2.) I'm not their fucking maid.

DH NEVER had chores as a kid because his mom is a clean/control freak. He and his brother "didn't do it right", so instead of instructing them how something should be done correctly, she just did it for them. Dude never learned how to load a dishwasher or wash laundry until he moved out. He's still not a terribly neat person, but has made HUGE strides in his skills. He actually floated the idea of hiring someone to come in and clean last week and was shocked when I told him it wasn't necessary. All the kids in our house are old enough that people just need to clean up after themselves and the house will be good enough.

[MrsC]

My perspective on the kids having chores is 1.) they need to know how to do these things, and, 2.) I'm not their fucking maid.

Couldn't agree more! This was my Mom's perspective, plus we make the mess so we help clean it. Her #1 piece of parenting advice to me was don't do for your kids what they can do for themselves. Within reason of course.

Don't beat yourself up, you're not making the mess. I find it hard to keep up with one kid!


Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk

[Ladybug]

Our house is/was a disaster by the end of school. I asked DHto take all this kids out of the house for the day and brought in our house cleaner whom I haven't used since winter started. She cleaned while I organized a ll the clutter. It took five hours and we only cleaned the first floor. She's coming back one Saturday to help with the second floor. It older her to put everything in the kids room on their beds and they had to put it away when they got home. The laundry kills. Everything they fold has be ironed later so it's not much help. I let them fold their own laundry and towels only.

[mommax3]

My kids do their own laundry and DH and I do ours. We do it once a week (clothes) and I do sheets and towels on another day. I have someone that comes in twice a month to do deep cleaning (bathrooms, kitchen, dusting, floors). We all take care of dishes, trash, and clutter...we ask the boys to do a specific task, or we do it. I did have to really get on the boys Sunday night about cleaning up after themselves. I explained that it was summer for me, too, and I had no intention of spending it cleaning up after them. So far, so good this week. It is definitely harder in the summer when we are here all day!

[Sheherezade]

Our house sounds like Sally's. We don't have specific chores for anyone (including me) but we all work when needed. Our house is usually tidy but not clean - we "clean" once a week and tidy many times a day. Cleaning once a week isn't enough with three cats and a dog, but so be it. We keep a lot of lint brushes around. Lol

I feel like summers can be either disorganized or pulled together year to year - I think it has something to do with getting off on the right foot. It's early enough that I might try to get it together if I were you because it does suck to have it feel so disorganized. That said, we've had several summers like that and it's fine. This year, we got our act together with several weekends of remodeling and cleaning for the guests that were coming in to town. It was a whole family effort.

You could do a spring cleaning event with the kids....devote the whole day (or two), wake them up early, assign out jobs, blast music, order pizza. You be the "foreman" for the crew. Reward the troops when it's all done and then set some livable maintenance schedule. I'd probably go for that if the schedule allows.

That said, I'm also in agreement with Sylvia. Cut yourself some slack. Clean doesn't last 72 hours no matter how well you do it. It's summer. You've got your kids home and all together. Enjoy it.

Angie

[medpedspouse]

I am for hiring out Kris. However, the kids still need some daily chores because I you have posted before how you have busted your ass to clean house and it is a mess soon after. Unless you plan on having a live in, the same will happen if you hire out unless those responsible for the mess take some responsibility for the clean up. I would say today is clean up day and have all hands on deck to get things cleaned up. I do this. Our cleaning person does the deep clean (ceiling fans, base boards, etc.) while I am decluttering my desk or cleaning out the refrigerator etc.

[PrincessFiona]

So here is my plan:

Next weekend (we're going to the cabin this weekend) we're going to have a major cleanup day. Each kid will be handed a garbage bag to take to their bedroom and fill. I want to get rid of crap. Then each child will be assigned one other area to clean up: bathroom,family room etc After this day of work, we'll all go to pizza/a movie to relax. At dinner when we're all out and no one can escape me, I'll present the new chore chart and rules.

This is my plan anyway.....I don't want to waste the money hiring it out if it will just get messed up again. I want my kids to take on more responsibility. I'm tired of being the maid. I'll let you know how the day of cleaning and meeting goes.

Kris

[SoonerTexan]

So I was getting sick and tired of the mess the condo was this week (on vacation with my in laws minus MIL) and suggested we do seething my mom did a few times back in the day and it worked really well.

We set the oven timer for 15 min and everyone had to clean for that 15 min. No excuses. A few people (youngest SIL) needed some pushing (actually DH the second day too!!) but with 8 teens, older children, and adults cleaning it was all done in the 15 min.

I remember this working really well as a child and I'm not sure why we didn't do it more often. The finite time limit encourages everyone to work quickly because they know it's over soon. Maybe you could do this every evening to help control the clutter? 15 min would make a dent. 30 would probably get everything after an initial big cleaning is fone

[HouseofWool]

If everyone is home for the summer - I would do 15 minutes right before lunch (or dinner) then 15 minutes again before bedtime so the house is relatively tidy to start the morning.

[diggitydot]

Another good prompt is when kids outgrow things. I won't buy anyone new clothes until they've gone through their existing stockpile and weeded out the ones that no longer fit. This came about because I discovered one of my kids was trying to fit into a pair of 4T sweatpants. She was 13 YO. She wore them as shorts and didn't understand why I was not amused.