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House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

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  • House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

    I have pasted the author's description of the book below because he explained it better than I could.

    From the author's website:
    When my wife and I bought a century old house in a suburb of my beloved city, I knew I had to write about it. The experience of purchasing a home place, among the most common events in an adult's life, felt more cataclysmic than, well, buying a house ought to feel. Second to childbirth on the seismic charts of human emotion. Suspicious of any prolonged navel-gazing, I didn't intend a memoir. I began the story as a novel. I sent seventy-five pages to my agent who said, "I can't sell this as a novel, but I can as a memoir."

    So I started over and what I discovered was that a house was inseparable from, and in many ways shaped by, the terrain on which it lived. This particular terrain was not just compelling to me, it was alive with ghosts of the past. The explosion of the suburbs in the late 18th and early 19th century was told in microcosm just outside my door. The families that had lived in this house told their own stories, all but forced themselves upon us, were still here. The contractors and real estate agents and house inspectors who moved through this structure added their own stories. And of course, the upper stratum of the narrative--the story of my family's life in the new structure, first as castaways on the third floor while the renovation was completed, and then as a miniature army of four advancing room by room, taking over foreign territory one front at a time and making it ours.

    House: A Memoir is an attempt to order and make sense of all these stories.

    It's also an answer to all the people who ask me why I still live in Cleveland. I never doubted the urge but I'd never explored the reason or understood the importance of living out my adult life in the place where I spent my childhood and adolescence, an increasing rarity in our vagabond culture. House: A Memoir is a love song to home, to the controversial notion of the suburb in America, to living where you grew up, to the history of this country and to the most contentious story of all, how we're using place in America.
    I've been meaning to read this book for 6 months or so but didn't get to it until last month. Given our upcoming move and the recent time spent thinking about what we want in a home, I think the timing was perfect. I also identified with the camping out in your own home while remodeling experience. Some people might find the tangents on suburbs distracting but I thought it was interesting. (btw, suburbs in this context are the very early streetcar suburbs, started around 1920). Before reading this, I really didn't know much about Cleveland or that general area of the country and I liked hearing about the history and growth of the city.

    There is an interesting twist at the end of this book that I am hesitant to describe that has more to do with the role of home in family life. I don't want to spoil anything but it is another aspect of the book that I can identify with.

    If you have lived in Cleveland, or remodeled a home, or felt the pull of houselust, you will probably like this book.

  • #2
    I read this a week or two ago. I plan to try to find the house one of these days; it can't be more than 2 miles from here.

    I was less than impressed with the way he justified throwing his family into total chaos for months and stretching them so utterly thin financially, and tying them to a place his wife didn't like, all so he could have a huge house in the town he grew up in. "my daughter's bedroom window overlooked a used car lot" (oh, the horror! ), and it's not like the old place wasn't also within walking distance of a couple of good shopping areas. I think after a while I was so annoyed by his attitude, I was reading to pick out more things to be annoyed by about him.

    That said, I did enjoy the book; it did give me a bit of a glimpse into the history of this town I just moved to, and some interesting food for thought about home and family. He's right about the spaces we live in helping define how we live; we've already developed some different habits and routines in this house than we had in our old house in Portland, partly because of the different layout and location, and because of this book, I'm conscious of developing those, which is interesting.
    Sandy
    Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

    Comment


    • #3
      was less than impressed with the way he justified throwing his family into total chaos for months and stretching them so utterly thin financially, and tying them to a place his wife didn't like, all so he could have a huge house in the town he grew up in.
      I thought he captured the conflicts and compromise of marriage and in some respects, it reminded me of medical training. I agree that his wife wasn't thrilled about Cleveland but she did seem to enjoy the house and he really wanted her to have darkroom space.

      If you do find the house, come back and post.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

        Bumping this thread for when JennP finishes reading it.

        Some online snooping found an address for him; the location seems to jibe with his description of it, and google street view shows me a house that looks like the one on the cover; now I just need to go by there someday and take a picture.
        Sandy
        Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

          Stalker!

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          • #6
            Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

            Originally posted by poky
            Bumping this thread for when JennP finishes reading it.

            Some online snooping found an address for him; the location seems to jibe with his description of it, and google street view shows me a house that looks like the one on the cover; now I just need to go by there someday and take a picture.
            When I saw the book cover I said "I know that house!" I couldn't figure out why b/c it clearly wasn't one of the Fairmount mansions or those kind of incredible places, but I knew I knew that house. Once we googled and found the address, we realized it's in the neighborhood behind our first apartment together (we used to live at Cedar / Fairmount, 5 doors up from Jillian's).

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            • #7
              Re:

              Originally posted by poky
              "my daughter's bedroom window overlooked a used car lot" (oh, the horror! ), and it's not like the old place wasn't also within walking distance of a couple of good shopping areas.
              FWIW - I would move from where they were, too. They were north of Mayfield (which I realize you are as well), bordering on East Cleveland. Probably behind the Honda or Pontiac dealership. That is a noisy, noisy area (my first aparment was on the south east corner of Coventry/Mayfield. I wouldn't want to have kids there.

              FWIW (again) I love the neighborhood you're in. You're close to East Cleveland as well, but for some reason the buffer of Monticello always made me feel better. There are great houses back in that little nook where you are.

              I've had mixed feelings about the book so far. At some points I just want to hear more about the house house house! Then he'll get into some historical thing about Cleveland that I may not have known, and I want to delve further into that. He jumps around more than I'm liking.

              And in general I'm ticked off that they managed to sell that first place for $150K in 2001. Obviously I don't know THE house, but I do know THE area, and it just kills me that we had such a hard time unloading our house that backed up to a freaking golf course in 2005! Sorry - it's still a raw wound - doesn't take much to get me going.

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              • #8
                Re: Re:

                Originally posted by Jane
                FWIW - I would move from where they were, too. They were north of Mayfield (which I realize you are as well), bordering on East Cleveland. Probably behind the Honda or Pontiac dealership. That is a noisy, noisy area (my first aparment was on the south east corner of Coventry/Mayfield. I wouldn't want to have kids there.
                Hmm..are you sure they were north of Mayfield? I got the distinct impression they were on Hampshire, which is one block south. There's a stretch of it that's behind the motorcars/toyota dealership area; I figured that's where they were.

                When we looked at places to rent right around Coventry, including north of Mayfield, the impression I got wasn't "East Cleveland" so much as "lots of college students". :huh:
                Sandy
                Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

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                • #9
                  Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                  married to an anesthesia attending

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                  • #10
                    Re: Re:

                    Originally posted by poky
                    Originally posted by Jane
                    FWIW - I would move from where they were, too. They were north of Mayfield (which I realize you are as well), bordering on East Cleveland. Probably behind the Honda or Pontiac dealership. That is a noisy, noisy area (my first aparment was on the south east corner of Coventry/Mayfield. I wouldn't want to have kids there.
                    Hmm..are you sure they were north of Mayfield? I got the distinct impression they were on Hampshire, which is one block south. There's a stretch of it that's behind the motorcars/toyota dealership area; I figured that's where they were.

                    When we looked at places to rent right around Coventry, including north of Mayfield, the impression I got wasn't "East Cleveland" so much as "lots of college students". :huh:
                    I'm going with north of Mayfield expressly because of the reference of backing up against East Cleveland. I actually used to live on Hampshire. Most CH-ers tend to not think about East Cleveland until you're north of Mayfield on Lee or S. Taylor. (Again, FWIW, my very first home - as an infant - was 888 Medford, which is right against East Cleveland (off of Noble). My parents were quite literally part of the white flight to the suburbs after the convienent store on the corner was robbed 3 times in 6 months. They packed up and moved us to Strongsville (ICK!).

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                      Hm...I can't find my copy of the book right now, but I think toward the end he makes a reference to "the Hampshire house" (talking about the one they moved out of). Let me know if you find that. I just figured he was exaggerating the "right across the road from East Cleveland" to help justify (to his readers) having to move out. :huh:

                      Strongsville, eh? At least you were close to the airport?
                      Sandy
                      Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                        I don't know, I wouldn't be too excited about my kid's view out the window being a car lot. To me that means bright lights shining at night (more than streetlights), distracting noises or conversations after bedtime, and streets that saw more traffic. Seeing as how I've never been to Cleveland, I can only go by the image I have in my head!

                        Our house in Denver was close to some used car lots and the points above are all based on that image in my mind. Those streets got more traffic than the residential streets and people would drive SO FAST. It still happened on our street from time to time but I didn't like it at all. Somehow we did adjust to the noise of living next to a hospital so maybe it wouldn't be that bad.

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                        • #13
                          Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                          Okay Poky - you're right. I finally reached the point where he specifically says Hampshire about the house they just vacated. Early in the book he didn't give any street names except for the one they bid on and lost on Derbyshire.

                          Still wouldn't want to raise my kids near that traffic and the sometimes-questionable population of Coventry.

                          As to his wife / her issues with Cleveland. She fell victim to houselust, too. He didn't find the house and foist it on her - she found it and took him to it, after they'd mutually decided to forego house shopping for another year. If she really detested Cleveland and/or her long-term prospects there, she could have used that year to push him to agree to another area. Once they committed to that house, it would have been financial suicide to up and leave it.

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                          • #14
                            Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                            Yeah; I know you're right about his wife, and I know I don't have kids, and I know my view of this area is probably skewed, because I never even considered buying a house here, and I really would have loved to rent near Coventry (or even better, near cedar-lee), and I know that the attitude when buying with kids vs renting without is *totally* different.

                            Something in the writing just rubbed me the wrong way, at least a little bit; I'm not sure what it was, and it probably says more about me than him or his writing.

                            We had to read Feynman's Lectures on Physics in college, and as I recall, I liked them a lot, so I picked up "Surely You're Joking, Mr Feynman" to read, and had trouble even getting through it because of his overwhelming arrogance that stunk the whole thing up. The feeling of distaste for the author was similar to what I got from Ruhlman's book, though it was *much* stronger in Feynman's case. (and I see from the one- and two-star reviews on Amazon of that book that I wasn't alone in that feeling. Whew)
                            Sandy
                            Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: House: A Memoir by Michael Ruhlman

                              Sandy, I haven't read his other books but from what I understand of them, he is a very specific writer and I think that comes across as arrogant at times either because it is or as a side effect. Maybe those high maintenance chefs were a bad influence on him.

                              I think another of his books is about a pediatric surgeon at a Cleveland hospital (Rainbow Babies?).

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