I wrote about this book in the callroom and am pasting part of my review here.
Rachel Simmons took a very close look at the nature of bullying amongst girls and presents her findings in this book. Her research includes focus sessions she conducted in a variety of schools (with varying ethnic and economic backgrounds), one on one interviews with girls dealing with bullying and grown women who dealt with it, and current sociological and psychological reasearch on the topic. One of the main points of this book is that there are gender differences in what constitutes bullying. People typically associate bullying with physical agression and the majority of time physical agression is attributed to boys. This is why girl bullying falls through the cracks. Ostracism, rumor generation, singling one or two girls as the "odd girl out" are all considered the female methods of bullying. Since it is often done by whispering, note passing, non-verbal communication and exclusion, these behaviors are sometimes off the radar screens of parents and teachers. The author theorizes that the root of this behavior is from girls being told to "be nice" and not learning to be comfortable with anger and express it appropriately. Their anger or hostile feelings "go underground" and the agression comes out as emotional bullying.
My one complaint about the book is that it seems to go on and on with examples of girls bullying. It honestly gets a little depressing and I started worrying that my darling daughter will either morph into an evil tormenter or be tormented mercilessly. There doesn't seem to be much middle ground. I had to remind myself that this *is* a book about bullying after all, and the author extensively researched the topic. So, if you decide to read this book and start to feel this way, you have my permission to skim, skim, skim through the vignettes about girls and their school and make your way to the last three chapters! However, you might miss out on some very interesting research cited by the author. The last three chapters -- Parents & Teachers, The Road Ahead, and Conclusion -- offer some concrete examples of how girls survived their situations, how parents can help with their daughters (great examples), ways teachers can be more aware, etc.
I recommend this book to women, parents of girl children, and men who want some insight into the sometimes strange ways that women interact with each other.
Rachel Simmons took a very close look at the nature of bullying amongst girls and presents her findings in this book. Her research includes focus sessions she conducted in a variety of schools (with varying ethnic and economic backgrounds), one on one interviews with girls dealing with bullying and grown women who dealt with it, and current sociological and psychological reasearch on the topic. One of the main points of this book is that there are gender differences in what constitutes bullying. People typically associate bullying with physical agression and the majority of time physical agression is attributed to boys. This is why girl bullying falls through the cracks. Ostracism, rumor generation, singling one or two girls as the "odd girl out" are all considered the female methods of bullying. Since it is often done by whispering, note passing, non-verbal communication and exclusion, these behaviors are sometimes off the radar screens of parents and teachers. The author theorizes that the root of this behavior is from girls being told to "be nice" and not learning to be comfortable with anger and express it appropriately. Their anger or hostile feelings "go underground" and the agression comes out as emotional bullying.
My one complaint about the book is that it seems to go on and on with examples of girls bullying. It honestly gets a little depressing and I started worrying that my darling daughter will either morph into an evil tormenter or be tormented mercilessly. There doesn't seem to be much middle ground. I had to remind myself that this *is* a book about bullying after all, and the author extensively researched the topic. So, if you decide to read this book and start to feel this way, you have my permission to skim, skim, skim through the vignettes about girls and their school and make your way to the last three chapters! However, you might miss out on some very interesting research cited by the author. The last three chapters -- Parents & Teachers, The Road Ahead, and Conclusion -- offer some concrete examples of how girls survived their situations, how parents can help with their daughters (great examples), ways teachers can be more aware, etc.
I recommend this book to women, parents of girl children, and men who want some insight into the sometimes strange ways that women interact with each other.
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