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Foxworthy on Minnesota

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  • Foxworthy on Minnesota

    Jeff Foxworthy on Minnesota


    If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through l8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,

    you might live in Minnesota.

    If you're proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each Year, because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation,

    you might live in Minnesota.

    If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too Spendy", you might live in Minnesota.

    If your local Dairy Queen is closed

    from November through March, you might live in Minnesota.

    If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, You might live in Minnesota.

    If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Minnesota.

    If you have worn shorts and a parka at

    the same time,

    you might live in Minnesota.

    If your town has an equal number of bars and churches,

    you might live in Minnesota.

    If you know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedi, Edina, Shakopee ,Winton and Ely, you might live in Minnesota.

    If you think that ketchup is a little too

    spicy,

    you might live in Minnesota.

    "Vacation" means going up north past Virginia for the weekend. You measure distance in hours. You know several people who have hit deer more than once. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.

    You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

    You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.

    You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

    You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.

    You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

    Where men are men and so are the women.

    There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Zups Grocery Store At

    any given time.

    You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

    Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

    You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

    You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

    You consider Minneapolis exotic.

    Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your Blue spruce.

    Down South to you means Iowa.

    A brat is something you eat.

    You go out to fish fry every Friday.

    You find 0 degrees a little chilly.

    You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Minnesota friends
    In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

  • #2
    Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

    Comment


    • #3
      Perfect!

      Since I was born here, I can appreciate it and I am proud of it all... well most of it!

      Comment


      • #4


        After a year of living here, I finally got up the nerve to ask someone what "tater tot hot dish" is. We don't have hot dish in Chicago - it's a casserole. Then, when I didn't even like it, my co-workers really thought I was nuts!
        -Deb
        Wife to EP, just trying to keep up with my FOUR busy kids!

        Comment


        • #5


          Alot of these could apply to Wisconsin, as well. As a southern transplant in Wisconsin, I find myself thinking, "WTH", quite often.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by grasshopper


            A lot of these could apply to Wisconsin, as well. As a southern transplant in Wisconsin, I find myself thinking, "WTH", quite often.
            I'm from the Northwest and LOL at this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !! I'll never forget a "black tie optional" event here. I had been here for about two weeks. THREE men had a button down shirt, a tie with a moose, bear or duck on it and CAMOUFLAGE pants!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
            • I've also learned that chives are "table onions" here???
              The women here I've met think that "having one too many" is about 5-7 beers in 3 hours.
              They generally eat what they kill here.
              "Comfort food" takes on a whole new meaning here. (think heavy cream, multiple carbs, and veggies slathered in butter and bacon????? )
              If you don't drive an American Car you are WELL outside the norm.
              A Pontiac Grand Prix is a "cool car" for young people.


            It's SUCH a culture shock sometimes!!!!
            Flynn

            Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

            “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Deebs


              After a year of living here, I finally got up the nerve to ask someone what "tater tot hot dish" is. We don't have hot dish in Chicago - it's a casserole. Then, when I didn't even like it, my co-workers really thought I was nuts!
              When I told people I had never had 7 layer salad -- I experienced the same thing.

              Um, generally my "salads" are tossed????!!!!!! THEY DON'T HAVE LAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!???????????????????????
              Flynn

              Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

              “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

              Comment


              • #8
                I grew up in Minnesota, so really enjoyed this. My grandpa's specialty (other than bringing home the wild mushrooms, venison, duck and goose) was making seven layer salad (with way too many onions!) I miss you grandpa!!! -m

                Comment

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