Announcement

Collapse

Facebook Forum Migration

Our forums have migrated to Facebook. If you are already an iMSN forum member you will be grandfathered in.

To access the Call Room and Marriage Matters, head to: https://m.facebook.com/groups/400932...eferrer=search

You can find the health and fitness forums here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/133538...eferrer=search

Private parenting discussions are here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/382903...eferrer=search

We look forward to seeing you on Facebook!
See more
See less

High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

    From a teacher blog I found on high school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:


    These are like a, you know what I mean, like how shall I say? Have a good laugh. Here's some actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays:


    1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
    2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
    3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
    4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room temperature Canadian beef.
    5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.


    6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
    7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
    8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge free ATM.
    9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
    10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.


    11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
    12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
    13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease. 14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
    15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.


    16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
    17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
    18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
    19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
    20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.


    21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
    22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
    23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
    24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
    25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.


    26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
    27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
    28. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

  • #2
    Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

    Holy Cow these are funny, my favs : 2, 9, 10, 23 and ...

    25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:



      My faves: 3, 8, 11, 15

      so funny!
      Peggy

      Aloha from paradise! And the other side of training!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

        It's always amazing what kinds of experiences kiddos bring when they write...I mean who really come up with that kind of stuff

        In being a high school teacher myself, I have had some doozies in research papers. My favorite: al’Khwarizmi (who wrote the first book on algebra) was a famous math-magician...

        And to think our children are the future!
        Jen
        Wife of a PGY-4 orthopod, momma to 2 DDs, caretaker of a retired race-dog, Hawkeye!


        Comment


        • #5
          Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

          #2 & #4 are actually solid IMHO.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

            Hee! I like them.

            I *thought* they seemed too good (or too deliberately bad) to be from highschoolers, though; turns out they're actually from Style Invitational entries:

            http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/co ... 00999.html

            And for those not familiar with Style Invitational:

            http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Style_Invitational
            Sandy
            Wife of EM Attending, Web Programmer, mom to one older lady scaredy-cat and one sweet-but-dumb younger boy kitty

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: High school analogies and metaphors, LOL!!!:

              Originally posted by poky
              Hee! I like them.

              I *thought* they seemed too good (or too deliberately bad) to be from highschoolers, though; turns out they're actually from Style Invitational entries:

              http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/co ... 00999.html

              And for those not familiar with Style Invitational:

              http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Style_Invitational
              That's some good research there Poky To bad they aren't from students, still very funny though It's so bad how many people steal other peoples work these days...

              Comment

              Working...
              X