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If you give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that
person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end
and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.
Friday night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an
argument going.
Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder now days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to.
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred
dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
There is a theory, which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly
what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear
and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a
whole box to start a campfire?
You read about all these terrorists -- most of them came here legally,
but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15
years. Now, go compare that to Blockbuster: you're two days late with a
video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in charge
of immigration
person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end
and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.
Friday night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an
argument going.
Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder now days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to.
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred
dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
There is a theory, which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly
what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear
and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a
whole box to start a campfire?
You read about all these terrorists -- most of them came here legally,
but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15
years. Now, go compare that to Blockbuster: you're two days late with a
video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in charge
of immigration
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